


and I think about you, though, everywhere I go

by lover_of_many_things



Series: And—never—in Extremity, it asked a crumb of me [3]
Category: Booksmart (2019)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, because i just want them to be happy, some smut, very little angst if any
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-03
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2020-06-03 12:07:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 47,859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19463668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lover_of_many_things/pseuds/lover_of_many_things
Summary: Hope misses Amy. Quite a bit. They’ve messaged whenever they can with both of their hectic schedules, usually only able to talk once a day so conversations don’t flow easily as even simple ones can span a week. That’s why it brings a smile to her face when she sees Amy’s name as she picks up her phone after it vibrates.Snapshots of Hope's first year at college while Amy is in Botswana and how they are making it work. Follows a couch in any other country would feel as sweet.





	and I think about you, though, everywhere I go

**Author's Note:**

> I admit, this one got away from me. At this point I've just adopted Hope as my own. Also, Louie is Diana Silvers' character's dog in Ma. 
> 
> There is one part of this fic that has minor assault with a forced kiss, but nothing further. 
> 
> Sorry for any mistakes, I got tired of reading it over and over, but please enjoy!
> 
> :)

Barnard is nice; although it is a bit jarring to go from traveling the world to being confined to a dorm room. 

Hope doesn’t have much. She manages to fit everything she needs into the back of an SUV, and her parents road trip with her to New York. They stay long enough to get her set up in her dorm and see some of the sights before they drive back, not wanting to miss too many days of work. Hope feels a little sad watching them go, but she had come to terms with leaving home at the beginning of summer and she’s always been pretty independent. Saying goodbye isn’t hard. No. It’s re-acclimating herself to an academic environment with other people that’s hard. 

The first week is the worst. With all of her travel and seeing the world, Hope has forgotten how stupid people are. The carefree happiness that she’s acquired over the months crumbles away and is replaced with annoyance. The other girls in the dorm are alright, if not a bit over-friendly, and the RA seems pretty cool. Hope just really hates meeting new people and having to do the fake song and dance. She’d rather just sit down with someone and have a really deep conversation to get to know them—not a game of two truths and one lie where one girl’s lie is that her favorite color is light blue.

So Hope stays a loner. It’s pretty easy with the bitchy vibes she usually throws off, very few people actually come up to talk to her. She prefers to stay in her room and read a book when she’s not at class rather than hang out in the common areas. Luckily, Hope got a single room—not that she’d mind having a roommate per se. There’s just very few types of people that Hope can easily get along with. 

Hope takes pride in her room. During the first week she spends most of her time setting up her room and making sure it has the right vibe. It’s littered with small things that she picked up along her trip; little knick-knacks, ticket stubs, and other souvenirs. Over her bed she has a tapestry of the world where she’s colored in every country that she’s been to. And if there’s a small heart drawn in Botswana? Well it really was a nice place to visit.

Even though she doesn’t really have any friends, Hope keeps her door open in case anyone does want to talk to her. That and she likes to listen to the goings on in the halls, trying to piece together who all these girls are. No one ever does more than just glance into her room as they walk by, but the option remains there. Even though she doesn’t like to admit it, Hope is pretty lonely. There are no familiar faces like in high school and her girlfriend—the thought brings a smile to her face—is halfway around the world. 

Hope misses Amy. Quite a bit. They’ve messaged whenever they can with both of their hectic schedules, usually only able to talk once a day so conversations don’t flow easily as even simple ones can span a week. That’s why it brings a smile to her face when she sees Amy’s name as she picks up her phone after it vibrates.

_Can’t believe I’m dating a college girl now! How’s your first week?_ Hope bites the inside of her cheek to prevent herself from smiling too much. God, she’s already whipped. She quickly taps out a reply.

_Hmmm. Fantasy of yours? And it’s alright. Same old school stuff._ She fiddles with one of the bracelets on her wrist as she waits for Amy’s response. Amy had made the bracelet for her during breakfast before she left Botswana. She told her it was something to keep her close with, even though it wasn’t her best craftsmanship. Hope didn’t mind then and she doesn’t think she ever will. She plays with some of the beads on it, sliding them up and down the tassels, spinning a couple. After a minute or so, Hope fears that Amy has fallen asleep—it happens quite a bit when they text because of the time difference—but then her phone vibrates again and she looks at the message.

_….no comment. And it’s not same old! It’s COLLEGE!! So many new resources and doors are open to you now. Think of all the books!_ Hope actually laughs, picturing the enthusiasm Amy would say this with, and files away the ‘no comment’ response in her mind. 

_Nerd._ Hope sends and pauses before slowly typing out another text. She hesitates as she rereads it, nervous at the response it might garner, but she’s not meek. So after a moment of second thought she hits the send button with her thumb. _Wish you were here._

A response comes almost immediately after. _Me too._

It’s not ‘I miss you’, but it’s close enough and they both understand. 

* * *

After that, it becomes a bit of a ritual for them to finish every conversation with that exchange. Never an ‘I miss you’ always a ‘Wish you were here’. Hope finds it easier to type out. Maybe it’s because typing out ‘I’ places ownership of the emotion; it places a vulnerability and Hope doesn’t like being vulnerable.

They talk as frequently as they can, but it’s still hard and before Hope knows it she’s halfway done her first semester. She’s sitting in one of her mandatory literature lectures—she doesn’t really mind it and honestly finds it a bit interesting—when she feels her phone buzzing in her pocket. Who would be calling her right now? 

She pulls out her phone and her eyes widen when she sees Amy’s name on screen. She hurriedly grabs all of her things, ignoring the mix of annoyed and curious glances as she rushes out of the lecture hall. As soon as she’s cleared the door she answers the phone, slightly panicked since Amy has never called her before. “Hey! Are you okay? Is everything alright?”

“Hey! What? No-no! Everything is fine. I’m all good.” Hope lets out a breath of relief. “Sorry, were you busy? I didn’t mean to interrupt and worry you.”

Hope runs a hand through her hair and leans against the wall in the hallway. “I was just in lecture, but it’s almost done anyway. Why’d you call?...it’s really good to hear your voice.” She hears Amy take a deep breath on the other end of the line.

“I just...miss you...and connection has been pretty good recently so I figured maybe I could try to call and it wouldn’t lose it.” Hope smiles and looks at her feet, her chest warm and fluttering. 

“I miss you too.” For a moment they’re silent, just on the phone with each other, connected for a moment from thousands of miles away. Hope clears her throat, “...so how was your week?” She kicks her foot and listens as Amy goes into the story of her week. Her class lets out but she doesn’t really pay much attention, laughing while Amy describes a mishap in tampon creating this week where she accidentally fused the cloth to her shirt. Hope doesn’t notice the strange looks she’s getting from her classmates who haven’t seen her smile at all really in over a month, let alone laugh out loud. 

“So,” Amy says as she finishes her story, “how about you? How was your week?”

“Oh it was fine. Not much to tell, really. Just class, homework, and reading.” Hope shrugs and pushes off the wall, starting her walk back to her room.

“Oh come on, you know me. Please tell me about your classes. I miss learning so much, let me at least do it vicariously through you.” Amy pleads through the phone and Hope immediately relents.

“Okay, okay.” She starts to talk to Amy about everything she’s been learning in lecture, and honestly it’s a pretty nice way to study. She makes it back to her room and is in the middle of telling Amy about how her prof completely dissed Keroak when Amy yawns on the other side of the phone. “Shit—it’s like super late there, didn’t mean to keep you up.” 

“Nonono, it’s fine...I wanted to talk to you.”

“Still, you should probably get some sleep now.” Hope plops down onto her bed, she hears Amy sigh on the other end of the line.

“...I guess you’re right.”

“Aren’t I always?” Amy scoffs and Hope smirks.

“Shut up.” They fall into silence after lightly laughing at the exchange. Hope closes her eyes and bites her lip, before softly speaking.

“Wish you were here.” Amy responds almost as if it’s second nature by now.

“Me too.” They fall back into silence, neither ending the call after their typical send off. They just lay down on their beds, oceans apart, but together. Hope eventually hears Amy’s breath deepen and she assumes that she’s fallen asleep. She ends the call, smiling. Tossing her phone to the side, she crawls down her bed and grabs the guitar that’s been sitting in the corner, playing it for the first time since she’s come to Barnard.

* * *

The next day, Hope is just laying on her bed reading when there’s a knock on her door frame. She peeks over the top of her book and quirks an eyebrow at the girl standing in the doorway.

“Hey, I’m Kelly,” she smiles, “I just wanted to say that you sounded really good last night; I didn’t know you played guitar and sang.” Hope places her book to the side, dog-earring the page, and sits up. She examines the girl in front of her. She has brown hair that goes down to her shoulder and she’s shorter than Hope, though that doesn’t mean much since most girls are shorter than Hope. She actually looks a little like Trip—Annabelle (Hope can hear Amy’s voice in her head berating her), not exactly, just similar. It takes Hope a minute to place her face, since she doesn’t really know any of the girls at the school, but finally she recognizes her as her neighbor.

“Hope,” She answers once she finishes her assessment. “And I dabble, just haven’t played since getting here…did you need something?” Hope knows her voice is flat with the question and it definitely comes off as bitchy but she’s a creature of habit.

Kelly doesn’t seem deterred, just shakes her head. “Not really, just figured we should probably actually introduce ourselves since it’s been almost two months. You seem cool, if not a bit stand-offish.” Hope narrows her eyes a bit for a second before chuckling.

“Sounds about right.” 

“Well, if you ever need anything or wanna hang out, you know where I am. Door is usually open.” Kelly knocks lightly on the door frame again as she turns and exits. Hope stares after her for a moment and then picks up her book to read again. She thinks she just made a friend.

* * *

On days where Hope feels more down than usual, she crosses the street to the Columbia campus. She sits on the steps, reading a book, and picturing this situation a year in the future. 

She’ll sit here reading some book or another, waiting for Amy to finish class. Amy will come up the stairs where she knows Hope is sitting and join her while she finishes up the page or chapter. Then they’ll hold hands and walk to a nearby restaurant for dinner. And—Hope is brought from her imaginings by a guy stopping in front of her on the stairs. 

“Hey,” he says with a grin and Hope can already tell he’s putting on a voice, “what are you reading?” Hope quirks an eyebrow but otherwise remains unaffected.

“What will you do with a book? Since you obviously can’t even read words as large as the title on the front cover.” Hope lowers her gaze back down to the book, determined to actually read the page she’s been on for the 5 minutes she was fantasizing. The boy laughs and clutches his hand to us chest.

“Ouch, I’m wounded...what’s your name?”

“Not interested,” comes Hope’s monotonous reply as she turns the page having actually read it this time.

“Come on. Give me a chance, you just looked so...effervescent sitting in the sunlight.” Hope sighs and rolls her eyes, but snaps her book shut. She hasn’t gone full bitch in a while. Maybe this’ll be just what she needs to brighten her day. She stands and, seeing as she’s on a higher step than him, she absolutely towers over him.

“What do you think this is? Do you think this is some movie where a privileged boy who thinks the world is against him goes up to the cool girl and she feels bad for him and decides to show him how to be cool? There is no heart of gold under this bitch for you to try to win. Now walk your dejected ass further down the stairs cause you’re blocking my light and I want to finish this chapter.”

The boy flounders for a second before positively fuming; Hope thinks she can see the steam rising from his head. “Fucking bitch. Fucking ugly anyway,” he practically spits in her face as he turns on his heel and stomps away.

“Hey! I’m sorry.” The boy stops in his tracks and turns back to her with an almost smug look on his face, so Hope really can’t wait to finish her sentence. “I’m sorry that your mom has to deal with your shit all the time. Your first reaction to rejection is anger? Grow up, did you leave pre-school? You never had a chance and deep down you know that, so walk away like an adult and stop being pathetic.”

She casually sits back down and opens her book, reading but also watching the guy in her periphery. He opens and closes his mouth several times, his face turning red with anger and embarrassment at the crowd they’ve now drawn. He stomps off and Hope smirks, turning her attention back to her book; she feels better already. 

From then on she garners back her reputation as a bit of a bitch, but at least everyone leaves her alone to read on the stairs

* * *

Hope actually does start to hang out with Kelly. It starts off with just stopping in when the door is open, but they eventually have some nice talks which leads into actual hanging out. Kelly plays the ukulele, so sometimes they have jams although Hope doesn’t sing during them. Other times they just watch movies and hang out in each other’s rooms, laughing about something or another. It actually feels really nice for Hope to have a friend again. 

* * *

Soon enough the temperature drops and she’s already approaching the end of the semester. She texts and calls Amy in order to study a bit for her finals; just repeating the information to the other girl is enough to study if Amy doesn’t have any knowledge on the topic. 

During the first snowfall of the season, Hope takes a selfie outside with an unimpressed look on her face as snow falls around her and on her hair. She really does think it’s beautiful, not used to snow at all really, but she sends the picture to Amy with ‘ _it’s cold’_ as the caption. 

When Hope is back inside, wrapped in blankets and sipping on a cup of tea, her phone buzzes with Amy’s response. _Beautiful._

_Me or the snow?_ Hope types back, biting her lip. She knows she’s fishing, but hey, can you blame a girl who hasn’t seen her girlfriend in three months. 

_The snow, obviously._ Hope laughs and looks out her dorm window. The snow really is beautiful, at least while it’s falling. Her phone buzzes against her chest again, several times in rapid succession. 

_You know that was a joke, right?_

_I meant you._

_I mean, of course snow is beautiful but I didn’t even notice it was there with you in the picture._

Hope chuckles at Amy’s obvious panicking and starts typing out a response. _Way to really bring it back around there. Smooth._

_You know me. The smoothest._

_lol._ Hope doesn’t even pretend she’s not laughing.

_Hey rude! I can be smooth...sometimes._

_Okay, I’ll admit. sometimes, on occasion, you can probably make an attempt that could turn out to be smooth. By accident._

_:(._ Hope rolls her eyes at herself as she feels her chest tighten at the sign of the frowny face. She sends out her reply without even thinking about it.

_Babe, you’re many wonderful things, but being purposefully smooth is not at the top of that list and I think you just have to accept it._

_:D!_ Comes Amy’s response, followed by another momentarily. _You called me babe!_

_Indeed I did. Is that the only thing you took away from that last text?_

_No!....maybe._

_Dork._

_:(_

Hope laughs and then starts to talk to Amy about finals again.

* * *

Finals have just finished and Hope is ready to relax. She’s walking back to her dorm from one of the lecture halls bundled up in multiple layers of jackets. As soon as she walks into the building she shivers away the cold, kicking the snow off of the bottom of her boots and making her way to her room. The halls are pretty quiet with most people studying for that final exam or those who have already left to go home for winter break. Hope isn’t sure what she’s going to do to get home yet; probably find a bus or train and have her parents pick her up somewhere closer. 

She tilts her head as she approaches her door, seeing it slightly ajar. She’s pretty sure she closed her door and locked her room before going to her last final. She clutches the strap of her messenger bag more tightly, ready to use it as a weapon with the books inside of it at the first sign of an intruder. She reaches out slowly and then slams her door open, nearly throwing her shit across the room when she sees the figure of Gigi laying down on her bed.

_“_ GIGI WHAT THE FUCK?” She tosses her bag down onto the ground instead, letting the tension fall away from her with a deep breath. At the outburst, Gigi immediately pops up from Hope’s bed. 

“Oh hey! You’re here!” She pulls Hope into a tight embrace.

“Of course I’m here. It’s my dorm. Why are you here?” Hope grits out, but reciprocates the hug anyway; she’s missed this crazy girl. 

“Hmmm, you still smell the same, that’s good. And I heard you were finished finals today, wanted to see if you needed a ride back to Cali.” Hope feels Gigi bring a bit of her hair to her face to inhale, which Hope then takes as a sign to back up.

“How did you…? Y’know what. I’d rather not know. Yeah, sure. I’ll hitch a ride.” Hope really has learned to go with the flow over the past couple of years, especially when it comes to Gigi. She grabs her backpacking backpack and starts to fill it with things she thinks she’ll need for the next month and a bit. 

“Great!” Gigi hops back up on the bed and seems to fall immediately to sleep. Hope just shakes her head and continues packing. As she’s grabbing her guitar from the corner, reaching over Gigi as gingerly as possible there’s a knock on her door frame.

Hope turns to see Kelly in the doorway. “Oh, hey.”

Kelly gives an amused glance at Gigi’s sleeping form. “Hey, who’s that?” She gestures with her head.

“Oh, that’s Gigi,” Hope moves away from the bed, “she’s a…..friend from back home.”

At the same time as Hope says this, Gigi sits up, insulted at the question of who she is, “I’m her _best_ fucking friend!” 

Kelly startles at Gigi’s sudden alertness, before Gigi says that she’s “spent” and lays back down. Hope looks at Kelly, her eyes wide with fear and confusion, and laughs a bit. “Yeah, she does that from time to time.”

“She’s actually giving me a ride back home,” Hope continues.

“Right. Cali. Well, have a safe trip and I guess I’ll talk to you over break. If not, I’ll see you when you get back.” Hope is ready to just give her a wave and a bye, but Kelly moves in and wraps her arms around Hope giving a gentle squeeze before stepping back. “See ya.”

“Bye.” Hope throws her hand up in a wave at Kelly as she walks back and enters her room. Hope closes her door, turns back toward her room, and surveys it, looking for any other things she might need and packing them up in her backpack.

When she’s finished she hikes the bag onto her shoulder, a familiar and comforting weight taking her back to the summer, and shakes Gigi. “Hey, I’m ready to go.” Gigi rolls over to face her, eyes still shut. 

“Great, our ride will be here tomorrow.” Hope furrows her eyebrows.

“Wait, what? Gigi, who is picking us up tomorrow?”

“You’ll see, now go to bed.” Hope looks at the girl for a moment in disbelief, before sighing and tossing her backpack to the ground. She shoves Gigi over to the side so she’s no longer starfishing and taking up the whole bed, knowing that there is no way to get her out of Hope’s bed tonight. She quickly changes into pajamas and takes the spot she's made for herself on the bed before Gigi can take it again.

She grabs her phone and sends a message to Amy, even if she won’t see it until the morning by now. _You won’t believe what just happened...actually. Maybe you will._

Which is how, the next morning Hope finds herself in a car with Gigi, Annabelle, and Molly. Hope never thought that she’d ever say those names in the same sentence, including hers. As soon as they leave the dorm room and Hope sees who’s in the car she stops in her tracks. “Oh hell no.”

“Come on.” Gigi grabs her by the arm and basically drags her to Annabelle’s car. She’s shockingly strong. Hope finally relents and Annabelle pops the trunk for her to put her backpack in. The trunk opens and she tosses in her backpack, placing her guitar delicately on top, and trying to ignore Molly’s gaze drilling into her head from the front seat.

Hope slides into the back seat next to Gigi and clears her throat. “Um. Thanks for the ride.”

Annabelle just nods and looks at Hope in the rear-view mirror. “Don’t worry about it. It’s on the way home and I have the room. Plus more people who can drive so we can take shifts and don’t really have to stop.”

Hope leans back and looks out the window as Annabelle turns up the music, still ignoring Molly’s blatant stares. If Molly wants to talk to her she’s actually gonna have to talk to her. She slips out her phone and texts Amy.

_S.O.S._ The reply is almost immediate which is a surprise as normally Amy takes a bit long to respond in the mornings here. 

_What happened!? Is everything okay??_

_No. Your wife is drilling holes into my skull with her glaring._

_What? Why are you with Molly?_

_The ride Gigi was talking about was with Annabelle and Molly._

_Oh wow! What a combination. Please play nice. I have to get back to work now._

_Ooooo. Texting while working. How scandalous. And I make no promises._ Hope puts her phone away and doesn’t realize she’s been smiling like a goof until she sees three sets of eyes on her; Molly and Gigi’s gaze is constant while Annabelle’s flickers periodically from the road to the mirror to look at Hope.

“What?” Hope immediately drops her smile which only makes Gigi break out into a grin.

“Was that Amy?” Molly answers her question with another question.

“So what if it was?” Hope crosses her arms and Molly just hums and narrows her eyes. Molly opens her mouth to reply when Annabelle cuts in.

“So, how was your semester or whatever?” Annabelle sounds nonchalant but Hope meets her eyes in the mirror thankful for the save from Molly. They were never really close in high school but they respected each other and hung out at parties occasionally. She shrugs.

“It was alright. Finals went fine and the content is pretty interesting. Did a lot of reading. Pretty boring, don’t really talk to many people.”

“Still a bitch?” Molly quips over her shoulder though there’s a bit of a smile at the corner of her lips.

“Only to those who deserve it….what did you say? Don’t let college fuck it up?” Molly laughs at the retelling of her valedictorian speech.

“Yeah I guess I did.” With that, it seems some of the tension in the car fades and the girls switch between listening to music, singing, and talking. Molly and Annabelle recount some funny stories from their first semester at Yale and Gigi tells a completely unrelated story about her breaking into Sam Adam’s house to commune with his spirit. Conversation comes to a natural lull again about four hours into the drive. Hope just looks out the window watching the landscape fly by and change to different farmlands and small town as they drive through Pennsylvania. 

“So what’s Amy up to?” Annabelle asks and Hope doesn’t even think before answering, still looking out the window and not even realizing the question had been aimed at Molly.

“She’s working right now, making those tampons, but she’s done in like an hour…” When there’s no response she looks around the car, seeing everyone looking at her again with various emotions. Gigi’s wearing what Hope can only describe as a shit-eating grin, Molly is looking at her suspiciously, and Annabelle just has a raised eyebrow.

“Okay, I let it go last time, but now you have to talk about it. What’s going on there?” Annabelle questions and Molly doesn’t say anything but her eyes give her inquisitiveness away. Hope’s actually very impressed that Molly has kept her mouth shut and decides to listen to Amy’s wish to play nice.

“We’re dating...got together when I visited her in Botswana over the summer.” Hope plays with her bracelet a little bit.

“They’re in love and it’s beautiful.” Gigi practically starts crying and clutches at Hope’s arm.

“Wooah! Love is...that’s a big word. We’ve only been dating for a couple months and most of the time we’ve been an ocean apart.” Hope doesn’t want to admit just how much she feels about Amy to anyone other than Amy before she’s ready, and she especially doesn’t want to say it around Molly. She shrugs Gigi off of her arm.

“You know Amy means everything to me right? And she deserves the entire _fucking_ world. So if you do anything to hurt her I will _destroy_ you.” Molly’s gaze narrows to a glare and Hope rolls her eyes.

“I’m only human. I’ll probably fuck up some way at some point...but I hope it’ll never be on purpose. I do care about her...a lot.” Hope looks out the window again, not wanting to look at anyone after being even a little vulnerable. 

“Fuck. That was actually kind of cute. Fine. I approve, for now.” Molly relaxes back into her seat and rolls her eyes, mumbling about not needing her permission. Molly immediately turns back around and points her finger at Hope. “What was that?”

Hope sends her an innocent look, “Hm?”

Molly does the ‘I’ve got my eyes on you’ hand motion and leans back in her seat. Hope picks up her phone and sends Amy a text.

_Playing nice is hard when your wife doesn’t play along at first._

“So,” Hope looks up as Annabelle speak, a mischievous smile on her face, “have you fucked yet? In person or on the phone, I don’t judge.”

Hope feels her eyes widen a bit and she glances at Molly, who rolls her eyes. “I’ve already heard probably too much about it, you can answer.” 

Hope clears her throat, “Yeah...we have.” Annabelle full on grins at the answer.

“How was it?”

“It was…” A thousand adjectives fly through Hope’s mind: _beautiful, hot, perfect._ “wonderful”. She decides on. The girls all ‘awww’ and Hope rolls her eyes.

“Yeah, yeah. Shut up.” Molly’s laughter cuts off when her phone buzzes and she picks it up to read it. She turns to the back seat.

“Did you seriously just tell on me to Amy?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“She just texted me, _play nice with my girlfriend_.” Hope smirks to try to offset the blush she knows is growing on her face. 

“If I get reminded I think it’s only fair that you do too.”

Molly squints for a moment before relenting, “fine.”

Gigi suddenly surges forward from the back seat to turn up the volume yelling about how this is her song while Molly berates her for not wearing her seatbelt, and Hope admits to herself that this is pretty nice.

They switch out in Ohio and Hope volunteers to drive so that Annabelle can rest. They make a pit stop but everyone agrees that they’ll just rotate driving and make pit stops so they can drive straight to California.

They drive through the night and continue switching until Annabelle is once again at the wheel. By the time Annabelle is ready to switch with Hope again, Hope can’t feel her legs. They’re very long and she has no way to straighten them in the car. When Annabelle pulls off to the side of the road, Hope stumbles out of the car immediately stretching out her legs.

“I need a walking break at some point soon.” Hope talks as she stretches and the other girls agree, stretching in various ways. Hope hops into the driver’s seat, her knees angry at resuming this position so soon, and she sets out driving, looking for someplace interesting to stop. They are in the middle of Nebraska though, so who knows what they’ll find.

After about an hour back on the road, Hope sees the sign for a state park and she’s immediately in the lane and exiting toward the park. She looks in the mirror to see that pretty much everyone has taken a nap, breaking rule number three of road trips—someone has to stay awake with the driver at all times. She pulls into the pretty empty park and parks the car. 

Looking at the three other girls, she doesn’t feel like individually waking them up, so she takes the volume dial and blasts it. As soon as the girls startle awake with different yells and expletives, she turns the volume back down. “Wake up. We’re going on a hike.”

Hope gets out of the car and plants herself on the hood, waiting for the others to get out and join her. She takes a deep inhale and feels a calm wash over her at just being out in nature. She tilts her head back and closes her eyes, just enjoying the feeling of the sun on her face. 

She hears the car doors open and close, hears the sounds of everybody waking up and starting to stretch, but she stays as she is until she hears the footsteps of someone approaching. She opens her eyes and looks toward Molly, who stops next to the hood.

“Everyone ready?” Hope questions as she hops off the hood.

“Yep. Now, where exactly are we?” Hope shrugs.

“No idea.”

“Well, what’s the plan?” Hope almost laughs at Molly’s need for a plan.

“Explore. Enjoy nature. Figure it out along the way. I don’t go into many things with too much of a plan.” Hope gathers her hair and ties it up before putting her shades on and heading toward the nearest trail. Gigi follows after telling the story of the time she met the Mothman, Molly only joining after Annabelle sends her a shrug and follows Hope as well.

They walk the trail for about twenty minutes until they reach a river that turns into a small waterfall. Hope carefully picks a rock and sits down on it, sticking her hand in the water and letting the current pass through her.

“Wow...This is actually really nice.” Molly uncrosses her arms and looks around.

At the same time, Annabelle pipes up. “What the fuck, why do you so effortlessly look like a model whenever you sit on something and think?”

Hope bursts out into laughter at the comment. “I’ve been told it’s the contemplative pout.”

“Pout, my ass.” Annabelle scoffs.

“Wait, your ass pouts too?” Gigi speaks up from the other side of the river bank.

“No. HOW?! Gigi. What the—“ Molly and Gigi go back and forth for a bit before Gigi finds her way back over. Hope sits and watches, thinking about how much she’s actually enjoying her time with these girls. A small smile forms on her face as she watches the river.

* * *

No more than an hour later they’re back on the road with Hope at the wheel and Molly in the passenger seat. Gigi and Annabelle fall back asleep pretty quickly in the back seat but Molly stays up, looking out the window and humming along to the music. Hope drums her fingers against the steering wheel to the song and tries to ignore the growing tension. 

Molly eventually stops her humming and Hope feels her gaze shift onto her. “Just...say whatever you’re going to say.” She glances at Molly from the side of her eye and sees the shock on her face at being called out.

“...you’re not too bad.” Hope’s eyes widen at Molly’s version of a complement, and she actually turns her head to look at her for a moment before looking back to the road.

“Wow. What a compliment coming from the class pres.”

“Yeah, well. So far you make Amy happy...and you’re actually kind of, sort of fun to be around.” Hope’s about to make a quip about pulling teeth and enthusiasm, but manages to hold her tongue.

“...you’re not so bad yourself.” Molly nods and it seems to solidify whatever truce they’ve started to form over the past day.

The drive continues on uneventfully until it’s no longer Hope’s turn to drive and she hops in the back. She looks at her phone for the first time in hours to see a couple of messages from Amy. 

When she opens the chat she’s faced with a picture of herself: head facing the sky with eyes closed, sunlight shining on her face, body reclined back on the hood of the car. It’s a pretty good picture that obviously one of the girls took; the framing and lighting is nice and her hair looks good. She scrolls beneath the picture to see what Amy said.

_Wow._

_Didn’t know I was dating a model._

Hope smiles. _You stalking me now? Or just paying off the paps to get the picture?_

_It was a gift from a friend._ Hope quirks a brow, so Molly then definitely. 

_And how are you planning to use this gift?_ Hope bites her lip eagerly awaiting Amy’s response, unsure of what she’ll make of the question.

_What do you mea—OH._

_Wow. I um._ Hope watches her phone as the typing bubble pops up several times for different intervals. Hope looks out the window as she waits for a response, knowing Amy is probably fumbling over her words trying to figure out how exactly to respond. A minute later the fated buzz comes from her phone and she looks down at the message.

_...can I? Would you feel weird about it?_ Hope almost chokes on air, not having expected Amy to ask for permission to masturbate to a picture of her. She glances around the car to make sure no one is paying attention to her and it doesn’t seem like it, so she quickly responds.

_Not at all...that’s actually pretty hot._

_But_

_I think it’s a bit unfair._

_Oh?_

_OH._

Hope panics a bit at the possibility of panicking Amy and quickly backtracks a bit. _You don’t actually have to, just jokin around._

Her phone doesn’t vibrate at all in the following minutes and Hope just sighs and leans her head against the window, a bit worried that she freaked Amy out.

“Okay seriously, what’s with all the sighing back there? You’re depleting all the oxygen in the car.” Moly pipes up, glancing at Hope in the rear-view mirror.

“Nothing. Just...thinking.” Molly hums and casts another look at Hope through the mirror before shrugging and focusing back on the road.

Ten minutes later, after Hope is sure she’s bounced the entire car with her leg—man, she could use a joint right now—her phone vibrates. She scrambles in as much as Hope scrambles; meaning she picks up the phone immediately to open it.

“Oh!” The sound involuntarily exits Hope as she looks at Amy’s most recent text. It’s a picture of Amy. She’s sitting on her bed in her pajamas—a tank and shorts—and it’s obviously a selfie from the close-up and camera angle. She’s running one hand through her hair and smiling, while looking down. She looks bashful, happy, adorable, and hot all in one picture. Hope is so enraptured until she sees Amy’s caption. _Idk how to be hot_.

_You’re stunning x._ Hope adds the kiss without even thinking and immediately saves the picture in her phone. She looks up to see Molly’s eyes flicking frantically between the road and the mirror to look at her.

“Oh...my god. Are you sexting right now? You totally fucking are! I send Amy one picture of you and it gets her so hot and bothered that you’re sexting. When she knows I’m in the same car with you...unbelievable. But also, entirely believable. Tell her to get it.” Hope thinks she now has whiplash from this conversation.

“What? No. We’re not sexting right now. It’d be too weird to do that with her wife in the car.”

“Damn straight,” Molly replies before pausing, “well...not so straight.” She laughs at her own joke and Hope feels some of the tension ease out of her. Would she sext Amy? Absolutely. Would she sext Amy in a car full of some of their closest friends?.....undetermined. She unlocks her phone again. _Your wife told me to ‘get it’. She thinks we’re sexting._

_Oh no. You told her we aren’t, right? She can’t hold another embarrassing sex thing over me._

_Of course I told her we aren’t…yet._

_...you are going to be the death of me._

_But you would...want to? Some time?_

Hope fights a blossoming blush. _Yeah, I would._

_Coolcoolcoolcoolcool._ Hope laughs at just how ‘Amy’ that response is. Another message comes through right after. _Well I’m going to bed now...but we should definitely revisit this. another time. When you aren’t in a car with my best friend._

_Sounds great. Have fun with that picture ;)_ Hope locks her phone and drops it into her lap, leaning her head against the window and closing her eyes to take a nap while she may or may not be thinking of a certain redhead. 

* * *

Hope doesn’t hear from Amy for the rest of the trip home, but she knows how busy Amy gets and she’s actually having a pretty fun time with Gigi, Annabelle, and Molly. None of them have ripped each other’s heads off yet at least, which is a good sign. Annabelle drops off Gigi and Molly first, since Hope lives the closest to her, they all say their goodbyes and actually make plans to hang out over the break. By the time Annabelle drops her off at home late that night, Hope is exhausted and pretty much collapses onto her bed, immediately falling asleep.

The next morning—or rather, afternoon—Hope wakes up to her dog jumping on top of her as her Dad opens the door of her room. “Oof!” The air leaves her lungs as the golden lab jumps up and lands on her stomach. “Louie!” She can hear her dad laughing, but she can’t currently see him behind the very excited dog covering her face with kisses.

“Looks like someone missed you.” Finally, Hope manages to shove Louie off to the side and sits up, petting him in an attempt to satisfy his want for affection.

“If only being missed included a lot less slobber.” Hope says wryly, wiping at her face with her unoccupied hand. 

“Less slobber just means tighter hugs.” Her dad quickly crosses the room and scoops her up in a tight hug, lifting her from her bed. Her dad is where she gets her height from so her feet don’t even touch the ground. She allows herself to appreciate the hug and the comfort of her father for only a few moments before she starts to squirm and escape.

“Ugh, you’re _so_ annoying.” Her dad finally lets her go, but messes up her bed head even further.

“Yeah, yeah you little squirt. Where d’you think you get it from?” Hope snatches her dad’s hand from her head and tosses it aside as he laughs and leaves the room. She shuts her door after him and turns back to get dressed finding Louie still on her bed, looking up at her with his tail wagging and tongue out.

“Missed you too, bud.” She scratches in his favorite spot behind his ears before grabbing some clothes from her bag and heading off to the bathroom, Louie following behind until the door closes in his face with a whispered apology from the other side.

When she emerges from the bathroom dressed and showered, leaving two straight days of being stuck in a car down the drain, she joins her dad in the kitchen. As she sits down at the table her dad places a nice breakfast of eggs, bacon, and toast down in front of her. “Mom home?” She questions as she picks up a piece of toast and scoops the egg up into it. Her dad sits across from her with a plate of his own, although he made himself lunch. 

“No, she’s had to start working weekends with this new case she’s on. Supposedly the defense has a pretty good case, but she’s trying to gather everything she can against it...you know, attorney stuff.”

“Yep.” Hope pops the ‘p’ and takes another bite of her makeshift egg sandwich. 

“But she should be home later tonight and tomorrow. She’s missed you and will be happy to see you.” Hope just nods as she continues to eat her breakfast. 

Hope and her dad spend the rest of breakfast in light conversation about her semester and his work, and when they finish Hope takes their plates and washes the dishes, tossing Louie her final piece of bacon.

As soon as she finishes the dishes she heads back to her room, pulling out her top drawer and reaching underneath the top to grab the remaining bit of her stash of joints. She pockets them just in case, hoping they haven’t lost too much potency, grabs her signature jacket, and walks to the front door. She throws an, “I’m going out!” over her shoulder as she ties her shoes and doesn’t wait for a response before leaving and hopping in her car.

Hope has no idea where she’s going and she sets off on the road. She drives around to her favorite hidden spots in LA, almost just to see if they’re still there after being months away from them. She finally decides on driving up to the top of the Kenneth Hahn State Recreation area. She parks, grabbing a book from her glove compartment that was specifically for ‘emergency books when she brought nothing else to read’ and takes a walk along the path, detouring through the hummingbird garden. She loves to stand silently among the birds until they forget that she’s there, and they fly around and so close to her that she can just observe them as they truly are. 

After about ten minutes just standing and existing among the tens of hummingbirds she continues on her trek slightly further up the path to a little outlet of land on the hill. She walks out to the edge of the outlet, and sits down with her back against one of the few trees in this area. Stretching her legs out, she takes one of her joints from her pocket and lights it. As she smokes she takes in the great view; it isn’t too hazy today so she’s actually able to see downtown and if she squints she can just barely see the ocean in the distance. On the other side there’s more hills and trees and, of course, some suburban houses.

The joint dies about halfway through since she spends more time looking around than taking consistent hits, so she relights it and finishes it off before putting the roach out against the tree bark. She places the burnt up joint onto her thigh so that she doesn’t forget to throw it away—she doesn’t want to kill the environment any more than the city already is. Before picking up her book, she grabs her phone and takes a picture of the view, sending it to Amy. _It looks better in person._

She picks up her book and gets immersed in the words on the page. Hours pass this way, with Hope merely turning pages and occasionally adjusting her position. She reads until she feels her high go away, which with how late she got up today sets her around dinner time. She’s packing up, closing her book, and grabbing the remainder of her joint when she feels her phone vibrate. Checking, she’s relieved to see it’s from Amy since it’s been over a day since their last conversation.

_The view is not the only thing there that looks better in person._

_WAIT._

_Aaaahhh that came out wrong._

_I’m so tired._ Hope bursts out into laughter at the series of messages, not caring what she looks like from an outside perspective. 

_I guess the picture didn’t do it for you then?_ Hope starts walking back to her car, glancing to and from her phone. When she passes the nearest trash can she tosses her litter inside. As she reaches her car, she gets Amy’s next message. 

_No! No, the picture totally...does it for me. You’re just very pretty and I’m too tired to try to be smooth._ Hope smiles at the message and tosses her phone to the passenger’s seat as she drives home. 

She pulls into her driveway about 45 minutes later, grabbing her phone as she gets out of the car. _You’re doing alright ;) and get some sleep._ She types out as she opens the door and shuts it behind her, toeing her shoes off. Louie comes running as fast as his senior feet can take him to greet her. She kneels down for optimal petting angles. 

“Hope, honey? Is that you?” Hope rolls her eyes at the sound of her mother’s voice.

“Nope, it’s your other daughter.” Hope looks up from petting Louie to see her mom, still dressed from work rounding the corner.

“Well thank god. I love her to death, but Hope can be a pain in my ass.” Hope chuckles and stands from petting Louie. 

“Hey, mom.”

“Hi, baby.” Her mom crosses to gather Hope into her arms and Hope returns the hug. Hope does love her mom, very much so, but they just sometimes don’t see eye to eye on some things. Her mom is also a bit of a workaholic, and while Hope knows it’s for a good cause and that her mom tries her best to balance what she can it still stings to come second sometimes. “How was your day? How was your trip? How was your semester? Tell me all about everything.”

Hope and her mother pull away from each other to sit down at the kitchen table where her father is reading a book. Hope tells her mom about everything she’s asked about, laughing through the story of the trip across the country. She finishes catching her mom up and they all fall into an amicable silence until her mom speaks up again.

“Sooooo…how’s Amy?”

“She’s...she’s good. Doing her thing in Botswana. Saving women from lion attacks one tampon at a time and all that.”

“And how’s long distance going?” Hope shrugs one shoulder.

“It’s good.” Her mom levels her with a gaze and quirks an eyebrow; she gets her calling out gene from somewhere. After a couple of seconds having a staredown with her mother Hope relents. “Okay, fine. It’s hard not being able to see her and only texting with the occasional call, but we’re making it work. There’s only a few more months to go.”

“A few months is a long time, Hope. And if you aren’t happy…”

“No, no I am. I’m really happy...and she’s worth it.” Her mom narrows her eyes a bit, sussing Hope our before nodding.

“Well, I’m glad,” her mom covers her hand with her own and gives it a pat and squeeze, “you know I just want you to be happy.”

“Yeah, same.” Her dad pipes up from behind his book and she chuckles.

“I know.”

“Good,” Her dad says while putting his book down. “Now, it’s dinner time!”

He stands and puts on oven mitts, reaching in and pulling out some very delicious looking baked chicken marinated in something or other. He plates it and they all sit down to eat, family whole again for the first time in months.

After dinner Hope goes back to her room, letting Louie follow behind and join her. She hops onto her bed, Louie following behind her as enthusiastically as he can, and grabs her laptop. She opens up Amazon and starts clicking through, looking for a Christmas present for Amy. She knows it won’t get to her and then to Amy in time for Christmas, but maybe it can be a Christmas/New Years gift. She continues scrolling through Amazon looking through with different keywords; she starts with nerd, jokingly, but then doesn’t make any progress so she starts to narrow down her search. 

After an hour with nothing, she sighs heavily and shuts her laptop. She’ll figure something out soon. She goes to sleep with Louie at her feet and ideas forming in her head.

The next morning she is woken up by her phone buzzing on her nightstand. Groggily she rubs her eyes to try and wipe away her tiredness, blindly reaching her hand around to grab her phone. She brings it to her face and unlocks it, not really registering who sent the text until she opens the thread. The name ‘Molly’ stares her in the face and Hope blinks, running her hand down her face and aggressively against her cheek to make sure she isn’t dreaming. But no, the message is still there.

_Let’s hang out today._ Hope starts to hesitantly type out a message. 

_Have you been kidnapped? If you’ve been kidnapped tell me something nice that you’ve never told me before._ The response is immediate.

_Fuck off, if you don’t wanna hang out just say so._ Hope sighs and rolls her eyes not wanting to burn this newly built, fragile bridge.

_Well now I know you’re okay. Relax, I’m just joking around. It’s what I do with people I don’t mind spending time with. What did you have in mind?_ Hope’s hands are nudged by Louie about who has now walked up the bed to bug her until she sits up as he always does. She gives in and scratches his head, getting up to let him out of her room. She heads to the bathroom to get ready for the day and gets dressed in her usual casual attire. 

She’s sitting and eating breakfast when the response comes. _Did you just admit that you enjoy spending time with me? Does that make us friends now? I’m not sure how I feel about that. How do you feel about lunch?_

_I’ve admitted no such thing and lunch is the most inferior meal, but I do partake if that’s your question._ Hope sends the message with one hand as she eats.

“Is that Amy?” Hope’s mom pipes up from across the table and Hope shakes her head.

“No, it’s her best friend, Molly.” 

“The one with you on the trip back home right? The one you didn’t like?” Hope shrugs.

“She’s alright, I guess. Still a little uptight for my tastes, but she can be cool...she wants to hang out today.” Hope’s parents glance at each other and her dad stands, walking over to her and placing the back of his hand on her forehead.

“Are you sick?” He questions as he pulls at her cheeks a bit and Hope slaps away his hand.

“Stop it.”

“I’m sorry. You can’t blame me for checking for a fever when you’re admitting a girl you used to strongly dislike is cool.” Her dad sits back down and her mom hides her laugh behind her hand.

“Yeah, well opinions change I guess.”

“So grown!” Her dad exclaims slapping his hand across his heart in a heavily exaggerated fashion.

“Alright, I’m leaving.” Hope stands and heads back to her room, hearing her parents laughter behind her. Despite her wish to keep a stony face, a small smile slips onto her face at the familiarity and warmth of the situation. She checks her phone as she walks into her room.

_Hm. I agree—breakfast, brunch, and dinner are all superior meals. Wanna meet at the Spot for 1?_ Hope glances up to the time on her phone: 11:30. More than enough time.

_Sure thing, prez._

Hope opens her Spotify and puts on her favorite playlist, tossing her phone onto her bed. She turns to look around her room, arms crossed, until her eyes land on her bookshelf. This is one of the ideas that she thought of while trying to fall asleep last night and _she_ thinks it’s kind of romantic, so she’s hoping Amy will too.

She slides her hand along the book titles as her eyes scan them, thinking of which ones to pick. She selects a few: _Fahrenheit 451, The Handmaid’s Tale, The Belljar, Into the Wild_ , and _Sharp Objects_. All books that she has thoroughly enjoyed, although she admits, some are kind of heavy. She piles them onto her desk and roots around through her desk to find a notebook. She quickly scribbles messages for each book about why she likes them, what they mean to her, where she was when she first read them, what they taught her, and other little reactions to big happenings in the books. She scatters the messages throughout the books, even adding a couple of messages just for Amy along with a couple of stimulating discussion questions, knowing exactly who her girlfriend is. 

By the time she’s written all of this it’s already 12:30 and she has to leave soon if she’s going to be on time. She scribbles one more note and delicately tapes it to the book on the top of the pile. She quickly puts on her jacket, grabs her phone and keys, and picks up the pile of books, planning to drop them off at the post office after lunch so they can get to Amy as soon as possible. She says bye to her parents as she heads out the door and places the books carefully in her backseat before driving out to the Spot. 

Luckily it’s pretty close to her so she makes it right on time. She strolls into the Spot and immediately spots Molly—even if it wasn’t a small space, Molly is easy to pick out in any crowd with her very specific and professional like posture, hands clasped out in front of her on the table. Hope approaches and sits down.

“Hello, Hope.” Molly Greer’s and Hope nods.

“Hey...this feels like an intervention or something.” Hope grabs the menu to start looking at food—it’s been a while since she’s been here. 

“Don’t be silly. This would hardly be the place for that...anyway, how’s home?” Hope raises an eyebrow at Molly, still slightly suspicious of the other girl, but she doesn’t want to ruin the potential whatever-this-is. 

“It’s...good. It was nice to see my parents and my dog. And god, I’ve missed home cooked meals.”

“Oh I _know._ I almost cried last night when my mom made meatloaf. And I don’t even really like meatloaf.” Molly leans forward in mock seriousness. Hope laughs and nods.

“Yeah I get what you mean. What—“ As Hope is about to ask Molly what her plans for break are the waiter shows up and she cuts herself off. They order their food and drinks; Molly, a water and a club sandwich, and Hope, an ice tea and some kind of fancy grilled cheese. When the waiter leaves, they turn back to each other.

“So what’re your plans over the break? Gonna petition something to city hall?” Hope sips on her drink.

“Actually,” she pauses for a moment in all seriousness, “nah, I’m just fucking with you. I’m just relaxing…and helping my successor balance the school budget at some point.” Hope laughs.

“There it is.” They continue to talk companionably as their food comes and they eat it.

“So,” Hope breaks the silence, “I gotta say, I never saw this coming. Why’d you wanna hang out with me?” Molly picks up a fry and eats it. 

“Well. It turns out you’re not so bad sometimes, and it’ll make Amy really happy if we at least get along. So I’m trying.” Hope nods.

“That’s respectable. You aren’t so bad yourself.” Hope finishes her food and Molly eats one last fry.

“Great! Now that we’re done with that mushy stuff, could you give me a ride home? My mom needed the car today so she just dropped me off.” Hope rolls her eyes good-naturedly and nods, grabbing her jacket and keys before getting up.

“I see how it is, luring me in with almost compliments just to use me for my car.”

“Exactly, I’m so glad you get it.” Molly gathers her things and follows after Hope to her car. Molly slides into the passenger side as Hope settles into the driver’s seat. Hope watches as Molly quickly looks around. “Nice car...what’s that?”

Hope is confused for a second before she glances to see what Molly is talking about; she’d completely forgotten about the books in her back seat. She’ll just have to go to the post office after she’s dropped off Molly. “Those are for Amy...I’m gonna send them to her later.” 

Hope pulls out from the Spot and starts off in the general direction where she thinks she remembers Molly’s house is. She looks at Molly to ask her where she lives, and sees an almost smug look in her eyes that she can’t quite place. “Where do you live again? I forget.”

Molly sighs. “We were literally there, like, a day ago.”

“Yeah, well I was tired.”

“Fair. Actually, can we stop by one place before that?”

“I’m not a taxi.” Hope grumbles and drums on the wheel, looking for incoming traffic before she makes a turn.

“Come on, I promise it’s on the way and it’ll be real quick. You might even enjoy it.” Hope hums, a bit doubtful.

“...fine. Where are we going?”

“Amy’s house, I have to drop something off to Doug and Charmaine.”

“Wait, wait wait wait. You want me to go to Amy’s house? ...Where her parents are? When she isn’t? That’s like a death wish for me.” Hope shifts her direction towards Amy’s house anyway, ready to just drive by slow and have Molly jump, tuck, and roll out of the car while she drives around the block.

“Oh, don’t be dramatic. Doug and Charmaine are wonderful and are so focused on supporting Amy that they won’t even be able to interrogate you or anything.” Hope sighs.

“Fine. But I’m not talking more than I have to.”

“I would expect nothing more.”

“It’s supposed to be—“ Molly cuts Hope off.

“I know what it’s supposed to be, but I can expect something less.” Hope laughs at her response.

“Ouch.” The rest of the drive is spent in a relaxed silence until Hope pulls up in front of Amy’s house and feels the tension in her shoulders.

“Dude, relax.” Molly unbuckles her seatbelt and gets out of the car, Hope following after word.

“Easy for you to say. They’re your parent-in-laws.” Hope follows after Molly as they walk up to the door.

“Wow. Never thought I’d see the day where I’d see you scared. Certainly not of Doug and Charmaine.”

“Shut up.” Molly laughs and knocks the door. Moments later, Amy’s dad opens the door.

“Molly! How’re you doing? And Hope, it’s wonderful to see you again.”

“I’m great, Dougsicle. So good to see you. Is Char Char home? I have something for you two.” Molly grins at Amy’s dad.

“She is. Come on in, both of you!” Doug ushers both of the girls inside and shuts the door behind them. 

“Char! Molly’s here with a package for us!” Doug calls out into the house. Hope is busy looking around the house, so she doesn’t hear Amy’s mom’s response. She’s never actually made it inside the house before, having picked to wait outside the last time. It’s a nice house; she can tell it’s cared about and that the family is very closed based on all the multitudes off pictures of Amy and her parents along the wall. Hope’s eyes scan the pictures and absorb every baby picture of Amy she sees because she is _adorable._ Her smile is so wide that her eyes squint, her head tilted up to the camera, and her freckles are on full display across her nose and cheeks. A small smile forms on Hope’s face as she takes in all the little Amy’s, and she’s so distracted that she doesn’t hear Amy’s mom approaching.

“Oh Hope! It’s so nice to actually meet you! Amy tells us about you all the time.” 

“It’s nice to finally meet you—“ Hope starts to say, turning to face Charmaine but the words die in her mouth as she sees Amy peeking out from behind her mom with a small, nervous smile on her face.

“Surprise.” She gives an awkward wave. Hope just stares trying to compute for a moment. Amy, her girlfriend, who is in Africa is not in Africa but is still her girlfriend, and she is standing in front of her. She knows she probably looks stupid, but she really couldn’t care less in the moment if her eyes are wide and her mouth is open. She’s startled out of her stupor by Molly clapping her on the back.

“Get it? You were the package—oh! And there she goes.” As soon as Molly claps her on the back and she’s jolted back to reality, she rushes forward and wraps Amy up in her arms. Hope hears Amy squeak before she feels her arms wrap around her too. Hope leans back, lifting Amy off of her feet and making her laugh before placing her back down. She hears the “awws” behind her but she doesn’t really register them, just focused on Amy. She pulls away just enough to hold Amy’s face in her hands.

“You’re here.” Amy nods, squishing her cheeks against Hope’s hands in the process.

“Mhm.” Hope genuinely and fully smiles.

“Hi.” Amy smiles as best she can with Hope’s hands holding her face.

“Hey.” Hope is suddenly hip checked off to the side by Molly who then wraps Amy up in her arms.

“Okay. That was cute and all, but I didn’t get enough hug time earlier so it’s my turn.” Hope is offended for a split second at being hip checked but then just observes the best friends hugging and Amy’s parents watching contentedly from the kitchen. Amy’s dad catches her eye across the room and waves her over with a smile. Hope smiles a bit nervously and crosses the room, letting the best friends have their moment as they start showering each other with compliments.

“It’s nice to see them back together, isn’t it?” Doug says as Hope takes a seat at one of the island chairs. 

“Yeah,” Hope looks back at the pair, “you can really tell how much they care about each other.” Doug hums.

“She cares about you, too.” Hope turns to face Amy’s dad in surprise.

“Yeah?” Hope clears her throat to try and rid the patheticness from it. Amy’s mom chuckles and pats Hope’s hand as it rests on the counter.

“She tells us about you all the time. Whenever she calls really. Sometimes we have to pull it out of her, but once she starts talking it’s hard to stop her. She’ll go on and on about how pretty you are and how—“

“Mom!” Amy’s voice is so high it can almost be qualified as a squeak. Her cheek is still pressed against Molly’s as they hug, but her eyes are wide in horror. Hope looks back at Amy and pouts.

“I’m enjoying talking to your mom. Please, continue.” Hope turns back to Charmaine and smiles.

“See, it’s fine. She wants to hear this.” Hope hears Amy groan behind her, but she continues to listen to Amy’s mother talk about Amy and her habits of talking about Hope. It’s when Charmaine gets into baby stories that Hope feels herself being dragged from her chair and down the hall by Amy.

“Okay! Talk to you later guys!” Amy shouts over her shoulder.

“We’ll continue another time.” Hope says to Charmaine and Doug with a smile and wave, before she’s pulled into Amy’s room. Molly follows in after, closing the door behind them.

“Okay, well my work here is done for the day and my mom is coming to pick me up so you two can have some _alone_ time, but we’re hanging out tomorrow.” Molly points at Amy and then shifts her gaze to Hope. “And, uh, today was nice. I wouldn’t mind hanging out again sometime.” Hope nods and Molly curtly nods back before turning and making her exit from the room. 

“You and Molly actually getting along? This must be a dream.” Amy laughs and sits down on her bed. Hope joins her and reaches over to hold Amy’s hand, playing with her fingers.

“I really hope it’s not.” Amy smiles. “...so how are you here? Not that I’m complaining. Definitely not complaining. But don’t you have another 6 months before you’re back home?” Amy shrugs.

“I wanted to come home for Christmas cause I missed my parents and Molly and you, so a couple months ago I started working longer hours and weekends to save up for leave. My parents helped with the flight and now I’m back for a month.” Amy finishes her simple explanation but Hope is still floored at the fact that she was listed next to Amy’s parents and Molly in levels of missing. After Hope not responding for a few seconds, Amy start to worry. “A-are you okay?”

Hope cups Amy’s face and tenderly kisses her for the first time in months, savoring the way their lips move against each other. She quickly relearns how their lips fit together after months of being apart. She pulls away just enough to rest her forehead against Amy and rubs her nose softly against hers.

“You’re here.” She practically breathes out and Amy smiles, nodding against Hope’s forehead.

“I’m here.” Amy captures Hope’s lips again, tangling her fingers in Hope’s hair and Hope hums at the sensation. 

They make out for—honestly, Hope isn’t really sure how long—before they separate, Amy rolling off of Hope to lie next to her as they had somehow become horizontal during their makeout session. Together they catch their breath and just enjoy the feeling of lying next to each other while holding hands. Once they catch their breath, Hope brings their joined hands up to her chest in order to slightly tug at Amy. 

“I actually have something for you in the car.” Amy turns over on her side to face Hope, but doesn’t let go of her hand.

“Really?” Hope hums an affirmative.

“Yeah…I was gonna go to the post office after lunch with Molly to send it to you, but now I guess I can just hand it to you.”

“What is it? Can I see it?” Amy props herself up on her other arm to look down at Hope so that Hope can see the excitement in her eyes.

“I don’t know...now you’ll be home for Christmas so I might just wait.”

“Oh, come on.” Amy drops down half on top of Hope with her chin propped up against Hope’s chest as she pouts at her. Hope glances down and honestly can’t handle it, so she palms Amy’s face and gently shoves her to the side as she gets up.

“Ugh, fine. Just stop making that face.” Amy laughs. Hope let’s go of Amy hand and stands to head out of Amy’s room. Before she can leave the room a hand wraps around her wrist, stopping and turning her to face Amy.

“Wait. You might encounter my parents, so we should make it look more like we weren’t just making out for a while.” Amy sets out about fixing Hope’s hair and righting her clothes.

“Amy, I really don’t think your parents are that dumb.” Her tone is flat but she still smiles at having Amy fuss over her appearance.

“Maybe not, but I’d just really like to avoid that conversation or possible lie because I’m terrible at lying, you know this.” Amy steps back, apparently seeming Hope’s appearance acceptable. 

“Yes, I do.” Hope leans down to give Amy one last peck and then runs a hand through her hair, messing it up again while giving Amy a wink. Amy puffs out her cheeks and opens her mouth to speak but Hope is already out the door with a, “be right back!”

Hope walks through the kitchen and living room on the way to the door, but Amy’s parents aren’t there, thankfully—Hope might put on a confident face, but the thought of talking to Amy’s parents entirely alone still scares her. She walks outside and quickly makes her way to her car, unlocking it and opening one of the back doors. She pauses. She looks at the pile of books with the message taped to the top and feels her nerves build. Before, she wouldn’t see Amy’s reaction to the gifts, only receive a text or call about them. Now, her message is going to be read right in front of her and Hope isn’t sure if she can take that. But, Hope isn’t a coward—or so she likes to tell herself—so she grabs the stack of books that have fallen and moved around. She organizes them in the way she wants and heads back inside.

She hovers outside of Amy’s room for a second longer than necessary and then toes the door open. Amy, who is sitting on her bottom bunk bed look up as she walks in and her face brightens at the sight of books. Hope stands in the middle of the room with the books and shuffles her feet a bit.

“Merry Christmas...I know it’s not much, but—I hope you like them.” She holds the books out to Amy as she stands, and watches nervously as Amy takes the stack. She rubs at the back of her neck while watching Amy read her note on the top book. 

_For when you’re missing me as much as I’m always missing you. A few of my favorite books with some of my grade A commentary and some stories sprinkled throughout. Let me know what you think of them, whether or not you’ve already read them. Wish you were here._

_Love,_

_Hope_

Hope had agonized over writing _Love, Hope_ since she had written it down. People ended notes with _Love,_ all the time—it didn’t have to mean anything, right? Hope ignores the voice in her head saying that this definitely means something and watches Amy’s reaction.

Amy’s cheeks flush a bit and she lets out a quiet gasp as she finishes the note and looks through all the books. “These are...all your copies?” Hope nods at the question. “This is so dope! I mean—why did I say that?—it’s so sweet and very you, and just, I love it. Thank you.” Hope laughs at Amy’s word fumbling, as Amy places the books on her desk and approaches Hope again. She pulls her into a kiss.

“You really like it?” Hope mumbles against Amy’s lips.

“Of course. I love books, and even if I didn’t. It’s a gift from you. Of course I love it.” Hope feels her heart skip a beat at the inference that can be made through Amy’s statements. What she said means more to Hope than she might ever know. Hope cups Amy’s face and gently presses her lips to her forehead, then moves to her nose, before heading back to her lips.

They’re mid kiss when Amy accidentally yawns and Hope laughs at the apologetic look on Amy’s face. “I’m so sorry! It’s just—39 hour flight and I’m still exhausted.”

“Not the worst thing to happen to us while being intimate.” Amy groans and mumbles something sounding like ‘never living that down’ under her breath. “Hey, let’s just lay down and take a nap. As long as I’m with you I’m happy.”

“Yeah?” Amy questions.

“Yeah. Let me just text my parents, then I’m all yours.” Hope runs her hands down Amy’s neck, shoulders, and arms, making her shiver. Amy’s cheeks redden and Hope knows exactly where her mind has gone to. She smiles as Amy shuffles over and climbs up onto the top bunk while Hope types out a message to her mom and dad, explaining the situation and that she may not be home for dinner. Then she shrugs off her jacket, tossing it onto the bottom bed before climbing up to join Amy. She settles next to Amy for a moment feeling very snug in the dimensions of this bunk bed before wrapping Amy up in her arms and turning them on their sides to spoon. 

“You’re like a giant in this bed.” 

“Yeah, yeah. I’m a giant everywhere.”

“Maybe...but you’re my giant.” Amy laces her fingers with Hope’s where they rest along her stomach and squeezes. Hope tightens her hold on Amy and nuzzles into her shoulder. 

“Nice turn around on that one. Very cheesy.”

“Thanks.” They laugh lightly and then fall into a relaxed silence as Amy let’s her flight exhaustion take over, and she falls asleep in Hope’s arms. Hope follows not long after, her entire body content with being near Amy again.

* * *

By the time they wake up from their nap it’s dinner time and Amy convinces Hope to stay for dinner. It doesn’t take much. Dinner is nice and not too awkward. They mostly talk about what Amy has been up to in Botswana, which Hope is more than glad to listen to.

After dinner Hope hovers with Amy in front of the front door. “I should probably get going...you should rest up.”

“Yeah, I guess so. But I’ll see you maybe tomorrow after I’m done hanging out with Molly?” Hope shakes her head.

“Spend the whole day with Molly. We both know how much you’ve missed her. I’ll see you the day after; I’ve waited months. Another day is nothing. Plus, we have a whole month.” Amy smiles.

“Alright. Text me when you get home please.” Hope leans down and lightly kisses Amy, not wanting to do anything too hot and heavy lest her parents walk in. Hope pulls away and opens the door, winking as she does.

“You got it, nerd. Try not to miss me too much when you’re with the wife.” Amy rolls her eyes and lightly shoves a chuckling Hope out of her house. Amy lifts up onto her tiptoes, and gives Hope a peck. 

“Remember to text. Seriously. People are wild.” Amy pokes her finger into Hope’s chest to punctuate her message and Hope nods. Amy nods back and steps back into the house. “See ya, babe.” Hope smiles at the term of endearment and Amy closes the door, her cheeks reddening.

Hope twirls her keys around her finger as she walks to the car. The drive seems to fly by as Hope thinks about the fact that Amy’s home and will be here for an entire month. Hope is home within ten minutes, even with the traffic. She walks into her house, Louie greeting her at the door, and goes to sit with her parents in the living room. 

She quickly pulls out her phone to shoot Amy a text. _Honey, I’m home._

_Are you making fun of me?_

_Usually._

_:(._

_Oh c’mon babe, I haven’t been able to poke fun at you in person in months._

_This isn’t even in person._

_You got me there._

_...goodnight._

_lol._

_I’m really glad that you’re home._

_Me too <3._

Hope finally looks up from her phone to see both of her parents looking at her with soft looks on their faces. “What?” 

“Nothing!” Her dad buries his face in his book and her mom slaps his shoulder as he holds in his laughter.

“You just...look very happy.” Her mom says simply. 

“Oh. Well...I am.” Hope shrugs with a small smile.

“Good, I’m glad. Well, I’m going to go to bed. Work in the morning.” Her mom stands, kisses her dad, and walks over to Hope, planting a kiss on her forehead before heading off to bed.

“Night.” Hope and her father call out at the same. Her dad goes back to reading his book and Hope hangs around for a bit before heading off to bed.

* * *

The days pass by pretty quickly as she spends most of her time with Amy, although she’s also hung out with Gigi and Annabelle once, and before Hope knows it, it’s Christmas. She gets up and spends the morning with her parents and Louie, opening gifts, eating food, baking cookies, and enjoying time together that they don’t often have. Her gifts mostly consist of books and clothes which really is all she could want.

Around lunch time, as she’s strumming her guitar on the couch in the living room while her parents are out grocery shopping for later, her phone rings. She pauses and puts the guitar aside. She doesn’t often get phone calls, but she sees Amy’s name on the screen and tucks her hair behind her ear as she answers. “Hey.”

“Hey! Are you—are you home right now?”

“Yeah...why?” There’s a knock at the door as soon as she answers, and Hope stands, walking over to the door. She smiles as she opens the door, seeing Amy shuffle awkwardly on her feet, holding a gift bag at her side. “Hold on, I gottta call you back. Someone’s at the door.” Hope hangs up her phone and Amy laughs.

“And you call me a nerd.” Hope steps back and opens the door, motioning for Amy to come in.

“Come on in. Wait...how’d you know where I live?”

“Oh! Annabelle told me.” Amy walks in and Hope closes the door behind her. Louie comes racing—well, as much as he can at his age—down the hall to greet Amy, tail wagging so aggressively that his entire body is wiggling.

“This is Louie. Louie, say hi to Amy.” Amy bends down to pet him and Louie immediately starts licking Amy’s hand and arm.

“Hi Louie, I’ve heard so much about you. You’re a good boy, aren’t you?” Louie slowly starts to transition into laying down and Amy is content to rub his belly as he flips onto his back. Hope watches, smitten at the interaction.

“Not that I don’t like you being here, because I do, but what brings you? Merry Christmas, by the way.” Amy looks up at Hope and stands, wiping her slobbery hand down her pants to dry it off as she lifts up to kiss Hope.

“Merry Christmas.” She says as she pulls away, “And you got me an amazing gift, so I had to get you something too.”

“No you did—“ Hope’s words are cut off by Amy covering Hope’s mouth with her hand. Hope raises an eyebrow, unimpressed.

“Yes, I did.” Amy removes her hand and lifts the bag, handing it over to Hope. Hope takes the gift and holds it almost gingerly between her fingers. She moves to sit down on the couch and Amy follows her. She places the gift in her lap.

“I thought you’d be with Molly today.” Amy shakes her head.

“Nah, we celebrated Hanukkah at her house a couple of days ago, so we can do Christmas together...now, open it.”

“Okay, okay. Bossy—I like it.” Hope smirks and starts to open her gift.

“It’s nothing big, but I thought it’d be nice. Y’know? I hope you like it. I mean, if you don’t that’s okay and don’t worry about it. Don’t like pretend to like it _for_ me or anything, okay?” Amy continues to ramble on, but Hope is entirely focused on the gift. Inside the bag there are three picture frames and a small bottle. She takes out the bottle; it’s filled with dirt and ‘Botswana’ is written across it in Amy’s penmanship. She places the bottle off to the side and pulls out the picture frames. The first frame is a simple map of Los Angeles, and the border is in the shape of the placemarks on google maps. The next frame has a map of Botswana in it with the same border but the border is a light blue instead of a light green. The last frame is of New York City, centered around the Columbia and Barnard campuses, and the border is a pale yellow. It’s obvious that Amy hand made the borders and put all these gifts together, so Hope finally looks up at Amy her head tilted in curiosity. She likes the gifts, but she thinks she doesn’t fully understand the reasoning. Amy just continues her ramble.

“—and y’know. You love travel so I thought, here’s some of the land of a place you travelled to. The pictures are also all kind of travel oriented b-but they’re more personal because it’s like...it’s like LA is our past. It’s where we first met and hooked up. Botswana is where we officially became a couple and is kind of our present…and New York. Columbia and Barnard. That’s—that’s our future. Together. I mean, if you want…” Hope is just staring at Amy as she tapers off on her ramble, looking at the ceiling and rubbing her neck with her hand.

Hope places her hand at the back of Amy’s neck and Amy’s eyes shift to find Hope’s right before Hope is tugging her forward and crashing their lips together. Amy is frozen in surprise for only a second before she’s responding. It’s only when Amy slides her tongue along Hope’s bottom lip that she remembers she’s just in her living room where her parents could walk in at any time, and she pulls away. 

“Thank you. I love it.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Hope holds Amy’s hand and gives it a squeeze. She’s leaning in to kiss Amy again when she hears the front door open and she drops her head to Amy’s shoulder with a small groan before pulling back. “Hey mom, hey dad.”

“What? You never greet us. Who’s here?” Her dad calls back from around the wall. He peeks his head around the corner and his eyes widen a bit. Hope hears a whack, hears her mom exclaim annoyedly, and then she’s walking around the corner with bags in her hands. 

Hope covers her eyes with her hands at the interaction.

“Oh!” Hope’s mom says, surprised, “you must be Amy! Sorry for the reaction. It’s just Hope never has anyone over.” Hope groans and throws her head back against the couch. Then her dad finally comes around the corner and starts talking.

“Not that she doesn’t talk about anyone. She talks about you all the time. I mean, at least once a d—“ His sentence is cut off by a pillow nailing him in the face and Amy laughs at the situation.

“It’s—it’s lovely to meet you Mr. and Mrs. Richardson.” Hope gives Amy’s hand a squeeze of solidarity and encouragement. 

“Please. Call us David and Faith.”

“I—okay.”

“Will you be joining us for dinner?”

“Oh, no. I just wanted to stop by to see Hope and give her her gift. My parents are making dinner. Thank you so much for the offer though.”

Hope’s dad smiles and heads toward the kitchen. “Another time then.” Her mom follows after her father to the kitchen to put their bags down.

“Some time later this week!” Her mom says loudly from the kitchen, so that they can hear her. 

“Oh! Uh...okay!” Amy says back, apparently having made plans with Hope’s family for the week.

“Please ignore them. And you don’t have to have dinner with us if you don’t want to.” Hope says, her head still resting on the back of the couch.

“No, I don’t mind. And I want to.” Amy taps their held hands against the couch between them.

“Okay.” Hope bites her lip to hide a smile, and stands, pulling Amy up with her, “c’mon.” Amy allows herself to be dragged off down the hall by Hope into Hope’s room.

“Dinner’s in an hour!” Hope’s dad’s yell reaches through the now shut door. Hope takes the bag of Amy’s gifts and delicately places it on her desk before sitting down on her bed. She watches as Amy looks around her room and takes everything in. She smiles at Amy’s ‘research mode’ face as she looks around.

“So.” Hope says as she leans back on her hands.

“Soooo,” Amy fidgets and then a smile curls at the edges, “your mom’s name is Faith and yours is Hope? If you had a sister would she be named Trust?”

Hope groans and falls back onto the bed, draping her arm over her face. “Do you know how many times I’ve heard that or something along those lines?” Hope hears Amy laugh and then a second later feels Amy straddle her hips. Hope’s arm is lifted up off her face and is tossed to land above her on the bed.

“I like them, they’re fun...I wasn’t really sure of your relationship with them cause you don’t mention them much.”

“Yeah. They’re pretty alright.” Hope lightly rests her hands against Amy’s thighs.

“What do they do?”

“Mom’s a lawyer, so she’s busy all the time. Dad’s an English professor.”

“That...explains a lot actually.” Hope traces a pattern over Amy’s thighs.

“Yeah? Do you wanna continue to talk about my parents? ...Cause that’s not what I was thinking we were gonna do in my room.” Hope runs her hands slowly down Amy’s jeans and feels Amy shudder against her. Amy lets out a shaky breath and shakes her head.

“No. Nope. Definitely want to...continue where this is heading.” Hope smirks.

“Well, come on then.” Hope hooks her fingers through Amy’s belt loops and pulls her down on top of her. Amy squeaks and catches herself with her hands on either side of Hope’s head. Hope looks up at Amy as her hair curtains around them, blocking them from the rest of the room.

Amy slowly lowers to lay on top of Hope, and Hope’s entire body relaxes as Amy softly takes her lips with her own. Hope loses herself in Amy, moving her hands from resting against Amy’s hips to slide up her side. When Amy moves attention to her neck, Hope’s fingers grip into Amy’s sides.

It’s seems like it’s seconds later that the call of ‘Dinner!’ reaches Hope’s ears. She slowly pulls away from Amy with a breathless groan.

“I’d keep going, but they’ll come in here in five minutes if I don’t go out.” Amy sits back and moves off of Hope to stand up. Hope stays lying there a moment, catching her breath and calming her heart. Amy clears her throat. 

“Yeah, no. That’s a good idea. I um...I almost got a bit carried away.”

“Me too.” Hope says as she sits up and breathes out. She stands and joins Amy, fixing her hair up as Amy fixes Hope up too. “See you soon?”

“Yeah.” Amy nods. “If not tomorrow then I should be free the day after.”

“Can I take you on a date then? A real one.”

Amy smiles and nods, glancing down at her feet. “Yeah, I’d love that.”

“Cool.”

“Cool.” Hope smiles and opens the door to her room. She walks past the kitchen with Amy, who says her goodbyes, and she walks her to the door.

“Let me know which day and I’ll plan it all. Thanks again for the gifts. I love them.” Hope kisses Amy as they say their goodbyes and watches after she leaves until she’s safely in her car.

She then goes to sit down and eat dinner with her parents, mind filled with date possibilities.

* * *

The next morning Hope wakes to a text from Amy saying tomorrow works better for her. She goes to the bathroom to get dressed for the day and stops short when she sees the hickeys on her neck in the mirror.

“...damn.” She pulls at her collar to see the extent and decides she’ll wear a collared shirt today...and apply some foundation. Luckily her mom is working today so she won’t be around to notice, and her dad is pretty oblivious when it comes to these kind of things.

She spends the day texting Amy and coming up with plans for tomorrow.

* * *

Hope can’t believe that the date had only been made two days ago with the amount that she silently agonizes over finalizing plans the morning of. She spends about thirty minutes figuring what she’s going to wear; it has to be the right mixture of hot and casually put together. She finally decides on a darker pair of jeans, black boots, and loose fitting white t-shirt with a rainbow pattern going across the chest, with her favorite jacket over top. She runs her hand through her hair, deciding she likes the way her waves are falling today. Grabbing her keys and her small bag, she throws the bag over her shoulder and heads out the door. 

She’s moving a little ahead of schedule, so she texts Amy to let her know she’s on her way. She tells her dad she’s leaving and hops into her car. The drive to Amy’s is quick and easy; she pulls into the driveway in less than ten minutes.

She parks the car and gets out, calmly walking to the front door. Logically Hope knows that they’ve already been dating for months and have also already had sex, but something about an actual date just makes Hope a little nervous. She rubs her hand down her pants before raising her fist to knock on the door.

A minute later Amy opens the door and steps out to join Hope on the front step, closing the door behind her. “Hi.” Amy hops up to give Hope a peck on the lips before turning to lock up.

“Hey.” Hope rests her hand on the small of Amy’s back. “You look cute.” Hope noses into the side of Amy’s head. And Amy does look cute, really cute. She’s wearing a cute patterned button up shirt with her patched up jean jacket over top. She looks entirely Amy and Hope loves it—she chooses to ignore her mental phrasing at the moment.

“T-thanks. You also do...look cute.” Amy finishes locking up and turns, grabbing a hold of Hope’s hand. “So what’s the plan?”

“That, is for me to know and for you to find out.” Hope and Amy walk to the car. Hope lets Amy be in control of the music, whether that’s through her own phone, the aux cord, or one of the many CDs in her glove compartment. Amy looks a bit overwhelmed at all the options and sticks to Hope’s phone which is already plugged in. She just resumes the playlist the Hope was playing on the way over.

Hope starts driving, tapping along to the music on the steering wheel. She rests her elbow on the door frame through the opened window. She laughs, completely enamoured, as Amy very passionately sings along and dances to the songs she knows. She glances at Amy as frequently as she can while still paying attention to the road. Eventually when they’re stopped at a red light Amy holds her hand out like a mic in front of Hope. Hope looks at Amy’s hand incredulously. 

“No. No way.” Amy just rolls her eyes and sticks her hand closer to Hope’s mouth.

“C’mon! I’ve seen your guitar. I bet you can sing too.” Amy moves her hand until it’s pressed up against Hope’s mouth. The light turns green and Hope lightly bites Amy’s knuckle. Amy lets out a startled gasp and pulls her hand back, sticking her tongue out while Hope laughs.

The song changes to one of her favorites and Hope almost rolls her eyes at the universe. The opening verse to _Teenage Dirtbag_ flows through the speakers of the car. She makes her decision a split-second before the chorus comes in, joining in to the song. Hope doesn’t hold back; honestly who could when listening to this song. It takes her until the second verse starts to notice that Amy stopped singing.

“What?” She glances over.

“Wow.” Amy smiles and maybe Hope blushes at the look of adoration on Amy’s face. Whatever. 

“Come on, don’t leave me hanging on the chorus again.” Amy grins and joins back in. Hope and Amy sing the rest of the song together and from there Hope is more inclined to join Amy’s singing from time to time.

Fifteen minutes later Hope is parking downtown which is a feat in and of itself. Hope and Amy get out of the car and Hope leads them through the streets of downtown LA.

“Okay, so I admit this is a little bit self-indulgent, but I think you’ll like it too.” Hope drapes her arm around Amy’s shoulder as they walk down the sidewalk. Amy wraps her arm around Hope’s middle so that it’s easier to walk together. 

The walk isn’t long and soon enough Hope is walking Amy into The Last Bookstore. They don’t have any bags to check so they head right on in. It’s a bookstore downtown that is labyrinthine in its stacks; there’s also a bunch of sculptures made from books and even some artist galleries too. It can get kind of busy since it’s a pretty popular place, but Hope has always liked coming here, grabbing a book, and getting lost in the stacks until she finds her own little corner.

“I know that it’s not much but—you like to read nearly as much as I do. So I thought we could grab some books, find a spot, and just read, talk, and relax for the afternoon. If you want.” Amy grins. 

“If I want? You do know Molly and I got fake college IDs just to get into the libraries, right? This is like my wet dream.” Hope’s eyebrow’s shoot upward as she smirks. 

“Sounds like this date is off to a great start.” Amy fumbles for a second before, surprisingly, composing herself and leans up to speak in Hope’s ear.

“We’ll just have to see where it leads.” Hope is momentarily dumbfounded and turned on—where on earth did that come from? Not that she’s complaining. No way. Amy leads her through the stacks and Hope’s focus is solely on her...until they walk through the poetry section. So she likes poetry. Sue her. She stops and peruses, causing Amy to stop as well. Hope takes her time looking through the different books of poetry. She sees from the corner of her eye that Amy is switching between looking at poetry books and classic books

They spend their time looking through the shelves, gathering books that they like and making their way upstairs. They look through the different galleries, Amy ends up buying a couple more patches for her jacket and Hope buys another small, leather-bound journal. They make their way to the horror room and then through the book tunnel. Hope then takes the lead and goes to her normal spot in the very back of the store right by the windows and manga shelf. She sits against the back wall and pats the spot beside her, until Amy joins.

They look through their book selections together and talk about what the book says it’s about or why they picked it. Soon enough, they are peacefully reading together while resting against each other. They cycle between reading and talking, speaking up when something in one of their reads interests them or they think the other would like it.

Before she really realizes it, the alarm she set hours earlier on her phone so they wouldn’t be late for dinner goes off.

“Woah, dinner time already. You wanna pack up and head out?”

“Yeah...I’m gonna buy like three of these though.” Hope helps Amy gather the books they picked out and carries them downstairs, immediately hopping in line to check out. Before Amy can even register it Hope is buying the books she liked and the ones Amy is interested in. “Hey!” Amy argues for a moment as the books are being bagged.

“Too late.” Hope scoops the bag up, Amy following after her as she starts the walk back to the car. “Plus, even more books to remember me by.”

“Yeah, but these won’t have the cute commentary in them.”

“Give me five days with them and I can fix that.” Hope smiles at Amy and she thinks she sees Amy genuinely consider the offer. If Amy wanted her to, she’d create commentary for every book in the world. “So, did you have fun? Was that okay?”

Amy awkwardly loops her arm with Hope’s, forcing her way in between the crook of Hope’s arm and the bag of books she’s holding. “That was perfect. Right up my alley.”

“Nerd.”

“Pot calling the kettle black I think.”

“I’m not a nerd. I’m broody, introspective, and mysterious.” The corner of Hope’s mouth quirks upwards into a smirk. 

“You can be all that and still be a nerd. Think more multi-dimensionally.”

“Nah, you’re definitely the nerd in this relationship, babe.”

“I’m just saying there’s room for two.” Hope laughs and they continue small talk till they reach the car.

Hope drives them to a small Italian restaurant that’s nice but not overly fancy for how they’re dressed. They’re seated quickly and make their orders not long after. They’re in the middle of talking about the newest true crime documentary on Netflix when both of their phones vibrate at the same time. 

Curious, Hope takes hers out of her pocket as does Amy. It’s a message from Gigi. 

_Party at Nick’s on New Years. I better see you there or I will find you._

Hope looks up to see Amy still looking down at her phone, looking a bit surprised. “You get the text from Gigi too?”

“Yeah, I just...wasn’t expecting an invitation to a party.”

“Well considering how you went to jail at the last one and saved everyone else’s ass I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re the most requested guest at every one of our former classmates’ parties.”

“I will not be pulling a repeat performance of that night.”

“I certainly hope not. I mean I love you, but I don’t really enjoy being covered in vomit.” Hope laughs a bit, but stops when she sees that Amy is just staring at her, eyes wide and mouth open.

“What did you say?” Hope tilts her head.

“That I don’t really enjoy being covered in vomit? It doesn’t really do it for me.”

“Nonono, not that. Before that.” Hope hums and thinks.

“Well, I said that I l—OH.” Hope’s eyes widen. “Um...it kinda just slipped out. You don’t have to like respond to it or anything. I didn’t mean to just spring it on you. Not a first real official date kind of thing.”

“Do you, um, do you mean it?” Amy plays with the utensils in front of her.

“I...Yeah. Yeah, I do.” Amy smiles and then looks around.

“That’s uh...aaaah” Amy shakes her head a bit and Hope laughs.

“Don’t feel any pressure to say it back yet, whenever you’re ready.” They smile at each other.

“Okay. I do really, really like you though.” With that, they finish up their meal. Hope leaves the table to go to the bathroom—spending all day in the bookstore was nice, but she has a tendency to forget about basic human functions when reading—and when she gets back she sees Amy signing a check.

“No fair. I asked you on the date.” Hope crosses her arms as she sits down.

“Yes fair. You bought the books. This is an equal partnership.” They have a stare down for a few moments before Hope relents—she always relents eventually when it comes to Amy.

“Fine. I get it next time though.”

“Deal.” They collect their things and head back to the car. 

* * *

“Do you wanna stay over tonight? We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to. I just… I like sleeping next to you.” Hope steadfastly keeps her eyes on the road as she asks this question. Amy clears her throat before answering. 

“And if I do? Wanna do things that is.” Hope gets a little turned on by the confidence seeping slowly into Amy’s voice.

“Then I can have us at my house in fifteen minutes.”

“But—what about parents?”

“Well, mine are probably in their room reading, if not already asleep. And also they don’t care as long as I’m safe. So that just leaves your end.” Hope glances at Amy to see her looking very determined at her phone. 

“I’m really bad at lying and especially bad at lying to my parents…”

“So don’t lie, tell them you’re staying over at mine.” Hope shrugs.

“Just—just tell them I’m staying overnight at my girlfriend’s house?”

“Yeah I mean, they’ll probably appreciate the honesty, and they thought you and Molly were banging for years whenever you hung out and still let you have sleepovers.”

“That’s...yeah, that’s fair.” Amy calls her parents and Hope focuses on the road and music to try to give as much privacy as possible in the tiny car. Hope tunes in again when she thinks the conversation is winding down.

“Yeah...mhm. Yes, I know. I’ll see you tomorrow. Yep. Okay, love you too. Bye.” Amy lets out a deep breath. “Sometimes I think they’re a bit too supportive...they kept going on about what we have being beautiful and special.” Hope clicks her tongue.

“I think that’s sweet. Maybe a little lame, but mostly sweet. They care about you a lot.”

“Yeah. They’re pretty great.”

* * *

Hope pulls Amy along by her hand through her house and into her room; they only stop to say hi to Louie for a moment. They don’t run into either of Hope’s parents on their walk through the house and Hope has never been more thankful to have her room on the other side of the house from her parents’ room. Hope searches through her drawers and gets out a pair of shorts and a shirt, tossing them to Amy, and grabbing another set for herself. Amy jolts when the clothes hit her in the chest but she catches them before they fall on the ground.

Hope takes her jacket and shirt off and Amy’s jaw drops. “Wow. Wow, um. Wow.” Hope laughs.

“You’ve seen me in less, you know.” Hope puts on her sleep shirt then removes her bra underneath and changes into shorts.

“Doesn’t mean I’ll be any less affected, each time. I mean—have you seen you?” Hope smiles and brushes her hair behind her ear, before moving to sit on her bed. “Oh! Right. Right.” Amy juggles the clothes in her arms, quickly changing. Hope runs her eyes up and down Amy’s form in her clothes. It’s a really nice sight; Hope could get used to it. Although Hope’s shorts almost reach Amy’s knees.

“You look adorable, really, but do you _always_ have to make me feel like a giant?” Amy chuckles and walks to Hope.

“Hey, I can’t help my height, and like I said, you’re my giant. Well, I mean. I don’t own you or anything. You’re entirely your own person. You know what I mean right? I—“ Hope cuts Amy off by grabbing fistfuls of the sleep shirt she’s wearing and pulling her to stand in between her legs. Hope leans forward and places a delicate kiss on Amy’s neck. She kisses her way up Amy’s neck to her ear, taking Amy’s earlobe between her teeth with a slight tug before whispering against her ear.

“This ‘entirely her own person’ wants to be yours tonight.” Hope thinks she can audibly hear Amy gulp and feels her shudder against her. Hope leans back to look at Amy and sucks in a breath at the look on her face. Her pupils are blown wide and her mouth hangs open just slightly, the light blush on her cheeks accentuating her freckles beautifully. Hope would be content to look at Amy forever but then Amy surges forward and connects their lips, and Hope is more inclined to follow where the kissing leads.

Hope wraps her arms around Amy’s waist and leans backwards into the bed, taking Amy with her. They break apart to shift further up the bed, Amy pulling off her shirt as she moves. As soon as they’re in a more comfortable position, Amy’s hands slide under Hope’s sleep shirt and she moves her mouth to Hope’s neck. Hope’s hand slips through Amy’s hair, scratching a bit at her scalp. 

“I’ll have even worse hickeys at this rate.” At that, Amy’s Head pops back up, curious.

“Wait, wait. I’ve given you hickeys?” Hope nods and reaches around her bedside table until she finds her pack of makeup wipes. She takes a one out and wipes away the foundation on the other side of her neck, revealing the healing hickeys from a few days ago.

“Pretty big ones too.” Hope’s breath turns shallow as Amy gently traces along the hickeys she left on her neck. Her mouth drops open to say something, but then she bites her lip in hesitation.

“...is it bad that I find it kinda hot?” Hope suppresses a groan and shakes her head.

“Not at all, just don’t make it a habit. Don’t wanna spend the money on foundation.” She pulls Amy back down to her by her hips, kissing her again. Her hips grind up into Amy’s and she moans as Amy deepens the kiss. 

* * *

Later as they lay together, catching their breath, Hope tosses Amy back her sleep shirt and puts her own on as well. 

“Just a precaution.” Hope snuggles back down into her bed and wraps her arm loosely around Amy. Amy reaches up and takes Hope’s arm, pulling it more tightly around her and Hope closer. Hope entangles their legs and lifts her head to kiss Amy on the cheek. “So how’d I do?”

“With what? You know you’re very good at this, especially with your tong—“

“I meant with the date, you doofus...but good to know. I’ll keep that in mind.” Hope flicks her tongue against the back of Amy’s ear and smirks until Amy pinches her arm. “Ow.” Hope pouts.

“I was trying to let some of the air out so it doesn’t all go to your head. And the date was perfect. Thank you.” Amy rubs gently at the spot she pinched on Hope’s arm. She then brings Hope’s hand up to her mouth and kisses her palm before holding her hand against her chest.

“Cool.” Hope immediately wants to facepalm. First she accidentally tells Amy that she loves her and then she says ‘cool’ while cuddling in response to Amy saying that the date was perfect. She’s really on a roll tonight. “I had a lot of fun today. With you.”

Amy turns over far enough to look at Hope. “Me too.” Amy kisses Hope and then turns back over, “good night.”

“Night.” Hope settles in and goes to bed entirely content.

* * *

Hope mentally thanks her father with all her might for not making it awkward when Amy leaves her room with her in the morning to go grab breakfast. They have breakfast and then Hope drops Amy back off at her place with promises to see each other later that week for the dinner that her mom insisted on. 

* * *

Hope and Amy have gone out together a few times since the first date. Mostly just small things, but Hope enjoys every second that she can with Amy while she’s here. Amy’s days back home are dwindling and Hope just wants to spend as much time as possible with her girlfriend before she goes back to Botswana for six more months. Would she rather spend New Years with just Amy somewhere quiet? Absolutely. Is she willing to risk whatever Gigi might do if they don’t show up to the party tonight? Absolutely not.

Hope has been lounging around all day reading one of the books Amy she bought at the bookstore and writing down commentary for it. Intermittently she answers texts from Amy, Molly, Annabelle, and Gigi about plans for tonight; she’s so glad she was never an approachable popular person in high school because even four people regularly texting her throughout the day feels like a lot.

The plan is for Amy to drive over to Hope’s and then they’ll take a Lyft together to Nick’s house. Through their conversations Hope has gathered that Annabelle and Molly are heading there together and Gigi will probably just apparate there at some point in the night—which Hope thinks is code for Jared is taking her.

Hope spends the rest of her day reading and writing, pausing only to eat and then change, until it rolls around to 9pm when there’s a knock at the front door. She closes the book and puts it aside to head for the door, nudging Louie aside to pull it open. “Punctual as always…” The playful tease falls away as she takes in Amy. Amy is dressed simply in a pair of overalls with a light, striped sweater underneath, but Hope finds the look as hot as it is adorable. That’s something that Hope has noticed over the years as well, Amy loves to dress in layers. 

“You look nice.” Hope pats her pockets down, making sure she has everything before joining Amy outside and pulling the door shut. She kisses Amy and threads their fingers together.

“You too.” Amy swings their hands as they walk and she calls the Lyft. Hope knows Amy has a way better score on Lyft than her, although hers isn’t nearly as bad as Molly’s according to Amy. That doesn’t actually surprise her all that much.

Five minutes later, the Lyft is pulling up to Hope’s house and they’re climbing in the back. The party started around eight, and the drive takes about half an hour so they should get there right at the swing of things. At least Hope thinks that’s when it’ll start to get into the swing of things. Hope’s been to parties early in the night before and it’s just plain awkward until more people show up. They keep their hands on the middle seat between them and talk about their former classmates; who they’re expecting to be there and what they’ve heard about their peers over the months. 

Finally, the Lyft pulls up to Nick’s house and the two slide out of the car. Hope drapes her arm across Amy’s shoulder. “Ready for party round 2?”

“Technically round 4.” Amy and Hope walk up to the house, different from the last one since Nick’s aunt safely made it off of the cruise ship, but still just as nice. The music is audible from the front yard and some lights are flashing inside along to the music. Hope is about to open the door when Amy tugs at her shirt. “Wait. Nobody knows we’re dating. Do you wanna go in more subtly?”

“No, I don’t care what any of them think...do you?” Hope has already started moving her arm from around Amy’s shoulders before Amy has grabbed a hold of it to keep it in place.

“No! No. I just wanted to make sure.” Hope looks Amy in the face to make sure Amy truly is okay and comfortable with this before nodding. 

“Let’s do this thing.” Hope opens the door and strolls through—because that’s what she does, she strolls—with Amy at her side. She already sees some familiar faces, including Ryan, Nick, and Tanner, milling about and a couple of heads swivel in their direction as they pass with a couple of shouts and cheers at seeing Amy present. Hope was right and the party is in full swing.

The music is loud so Hope leans close to Amy to talk in her ear. “Do you want anything to drink?” Amy nods.

“Whatever you’re having is fine.”

“Sure thing, babe.” Hope cups Amy’s face and gently kisses her. Maybe she kisses her a little longer than would be considered a peck, and maybe she does that because Ryan, Amy’s old crush is standing across the room. She pulls away slowly to see a semi-dazed look on Amy’s face. “Be right back.” She walks off to where Hope knows the bar set up usually is at Nick’s parties.

A hand claps down on her shoulder and she turns to see Tanner. “YOOO!! You and Amy are a thing now? That’s wild! Happy for you though, bro. Nothin’ but love. You need a drink? I’ll get you guys some drinks.” Tanner walks behind the bar and makes two drink while Hope leans against the makeshift bar, the kitchen island, and surveys the room. She sees Annabelle and Molly walk into the party and Molly immediately makes her way to Amy who is talking to George, who immediately jumps ship on the conversation when Molly approaches. “Here you go! I promise, they’ll taste good.”

“Alright, thanks dude.” Hope throws him a two fingered salute and grabs the two drinks. 

“Let me know if you want more!” She nods and walks back over to Amy.

She waits on handing Amy her drink until she and Molly are done complimenting each other’s outfits, lips curled upward in a smile at the open display between the two of them. When they seem to have worn down, she gives Amy her drink and sips her own. 

“Y’know I’ve never seen you do the girlfriend thing in person.” Hope looks at Annabelle who seems to have been watching her. “It’s cute that you’re whipped.” Hope just rolls her eyes, not having a good enough comeback for that cause it’s kind of true and she knows Annabelle could rip apart any argument she makes. It’s one of the reasons Hope respects her. “Well, I’m gonna go make my rounds. Hit me up later if you’re gonna smoke and don’t see me.”

“Sure.” Hope is sipping her drink and surveying the party when Amy’s arm slips around her waist and pulls Hope against her. She hums in contentment and looks down at Amy.

“People watching?”

“You know me. It’s what I always do at parties; I didn’t want to interrupt you and the wife.”

“Are you ever gonna stop calling her that?”

“Are you two ever going to get a divorce?”

“You two are disgustingly cute, so I have to leave. I’m gonna go say hi to Nick, since he’s obviously already seen me.” Molly interrupts with crosses arms. Amy separates from Hope and plants her hands on Molly’s shoulders even though one is holding a drink.

“Are you gonna be okay? Do you need me to do something? I can—I can’t fight him. But I can sternly talk to him.” Molly puts her hands on top of Amy’s and slides them off her shoulders.

“What I _need_ you to do is to relax and have fun at this party with your girlfriend and your best friend after she’s said hi to her old crush. I’ll be fine, promise. A semester at University has done wonders.” Hope isn’t sure if she’s ever agreed more with something that Molly has said—to be honest, she was always zoned out when she talked about class agenda things. Molly gives an assured nod then walks over to Nick who is now talking to some guy that Hope never learned the name of.

Hope brushes her hand along the back of Amy’s arm to get her attention. “Wanna find somewhere to sit? She’ll catch up.” Amy casts one last wary glance toward Molly and Nick, before nodding.

“Somewhere still in sight though.” Hope nods, knowing Amy is still concerned for Molly and will do anything for her. 

“Of course.” Hope leads them to a couple of chairs in the living room that have a view back to the hall and kitchen area, and a direct line of sight to Molly. Hope finishes her first drink not long after and gets up to get another one since Amy is still nursing her first.

It doesn’t take long to get Tanner’s attention for a drink and to get back, but when she does she finds her seat taken by Ryan. She pauses in her stride and takes a deep breath, calming the old insecurities that rise to the surface.

“Hey.” Hope says, announcing her presence as she comes to a stop next to Amy who looks up at her and smiles before looking back at Ryan.

“Hey, Hope. How are ya dude? It’s been a while. I didn’t know you and Amy are dating now. That’s like, crazy. But the good kinda crazy, Y’know?” Hope nods.

“Yeah. I’m doing good. How bout you? Are you and Nick still a thing?” Hope takes a sip of her drink and just narrowly dodges the elbow that Amy tries to push into her side.

“Good, good. And yeah, but it’s just a casual thing. Whenever we’re both around kind of thing.” Hope hums. “Okay, well I’ll talk to you guys later okay? We’re playing drinking games out back closer to midnight, and if karaoke starts up I’ll let you know, Amy.” Ryan gets up and walks away with a friendly smile and wave. Hope nods back at her.

“Yeah, see you later!” Amy holds up a hand in a wave. Hope returns to her seat.

“So how’d your convo with an ex-crush go? You and Molly can compare notes.” Hope chuckles and Amy gently nudges Hope with her shoulder.

“Shut up. It actually went...really well. It’s so easy to talk to her now that there’s no feelings there other than friendship.” Hope feels the remaining insecurities in the pit of her stomach shrivel up and die. 

“I’m glad. Ryan’s one of the cool, relaxed ones in this group. Now that you don’t have feelings for her anymore you can actually have a full conversation and actually get to know her better.”

“Yeah, it is—wait a minute!” Amy turns to face Hope with a gasp, who just blinks at her.

“What?”

“Were you jealous of her?”

“What? No. We’re dating. What would I have to be jealous over now?” Hope takes another sip of her drink.

“Now. You said now. Which means there was a then. Which means that you were!” Amy’s voice lowers to an emphatic whisper and she pokes Hope in the shoulder. Hope groans and throws her head back, cursing her phrasing and Amy’s attention to detail.

“Maybe I was back then. Just a little. But I’ve been working on it. You have and deserve all my trust and not the worry bred from my insecurities, or whatever.” She finishes, looking into her drink and then taking a sip, as if the ‘or whatever’ lessens the meaning of what she’s just said. Amy still hasn’t said anything by the time she finishes drinking so she chances a glance at Amy. 

Hope’s eyebrows raise in surprise as she sees the look she’s now come to recognize as Amy being turned on present on Amy’s face. “That was one of the hottest things you’ve ever said to me.” Hope tries not to take offense at the several other hot things that she’s said to Amy over the months. 

“That really does it for you?”

“You saying that I have all your trust and you are working through your insecurities? Fuck yeah that does it for me.” Hope smirks.

“Good to know.” Hope’s leaning in to kiss Amy when a hand lands on both of their shoulders and they start apart. 

“There you two are! I’ve been looking everywhere.” Gigi drags out ‘everywhere’ and moves her hands to wrap both Hope and Amy into a hug. “I’ve missed you both so much.”

Hope pats Gigi’s hand, “missed you too, Gig.” Gigi removes her arm from around Hope to just completely wrap Amy in her arms. Amy somewhat awkwardly pats Gigi on the back as Gigi takes deep inhaled of her hair,

“You still smell so good. God, I’m glad you’re here. Now come on! Dance party in the other room! RIGHT NOW!” Gigi practically carries Amy out of the room and Hope follows after, amused and picking up Amy’s drink. She goes to top it off when she hears Molly.

“Gigi, what the _fuck_? Where are you carrying Amy to? Get back here!” She tops her and Amy’s drinks off and watches as Molly chases after Gigi who is carrying Amy who is reaching out to Molly. It’s a pretty funny image. No one else really pays the occurrence any mind since Gigi is involved and it’s just to be expected at this point.

Hope follows after the group into the next room where, surprisingly, there actually is a small dance party happening. Usually it’s just Gigi. Amy has been put down and is laughing with Molly as they dance together. Hope looks on fondly, content to just lean against the wall and watch.

“Could you reign in the heart eyes a little? I don’t want you to lose your reputation as a bitch cause then I’m the only one left.” Annabelle appears next to Hope and Hope rolls her eyes.

“What? Do you think you’re Gigi now? Popping up unexpectedly?”

“I literally just walked up but you were too preoccupied to notice. Thanks for proving my point.” Well, shit. Hope’s normally more observant than that. “Go on and dance. I’ll watch the drinks.”

“Do I look like someone who dances?” Hope says to Annabelle before she makes eye contact with Amy who tries to wave her into the crowd. She shakes her head with a small smile. A determined look crosses Amy’s face and she does this strange sort of shuffle dance across the room; it’s cute. When she finally gets up to Hope she grabs Hope’s wrists and starts tugging her . 

“Come on! It’ll be fun. Just for a bit.” Hope puts the drinks down next to Annabelle so they don’t spill, and as soon as she’s back up Amy is tugging her to the dance floor again. She puts up as much resistance to seem convincing, only a bit of it genuine. See, Hope’s a tall person which means she has long limbs, and wow does Hope has _long_ limbs. She’s never really been a dancer at parties because she just feels lanky next to everyone else, and it’s also at an energy level that she rarely gets to.

Amy finally manages to get her into the small crowd of dancing bodies and then she resumes her very particular type of dancing around Hope and Molly. Hope laughs and starts to dance in a much more subdued way, really just moving her hips and shuffling a bit. She feels a little awkward but overall it’s kind of nice. A couple of songs later Gigi appears in the crowd again, dancing dramatically using mostly arms. She circles around Hope while dancing then grabs one of Hope’s hands and twirls her, which Hope has to bend down slightly to do. By the time she’s twirled and righted herself, Gigi is gone again. 

After one more song, she catches Amy’s attention and motions that she’s going off to the side of the room. Amy nods and leans in to talk to Molly; they seem to be having a full conversation, so Hope walks back over to where Annabelle is still standing with the drinks. Hope takes her and takes a hefty gulp.

“Have fun?” Annabelle asks with a smirk on her face. 

“Shut up.” There is no animosity behind the words at all and Hope just leans against the wall next to Annabelle, happy to stand silently with her and watch the room around them. Jared enters the room, thankfully not wearing a shirt with his face on it, and Hope watches a series of reactions on Molly’s face as she notices Jared and then looks at Annabelle. Interesting. Hope takes a sip of her drink and files that information away for later. 

Gigi emerges from the dancing crowd only to snag Jared into it and they dance with Molly and Amy, or at least adjacent to them. 

“So do you want a ride back too? It’s on the way.” Hope turns her head to look at Annabelle.

“Yeah, sure. That’d be awesome. Do you know when you’re leaving yet?”

“Two weeks.”

“Works for me.” Hope picks up Amy’s cup too, not wanting to leave it alone and motions outside with her head.

“Wanna smoke?”

“Hell yeah.” Hope nods and takes one more look at Amy, but she’s busy dancing so she walks out of the room. Amy can find Hope if she needs her. She and Annabelle walk through the house and into the backyard. The air is cool but it’s still a nice night and Hope is fine in her jacket. There’s a fire pit going on the other side of the yard that people are gathered around, but Hope walks to the more uninhabited area.

“Joint or cigarette?” Hope reaches her hand into her pocket.

“Cigarette, I’m driving tonight.” Hope hums and grabs the pack of cigarettes she has instead of the joint. She puts a cigarette between her lips and lights it, taking drag before passing it to Annabelle.

“Y’know I’ve never seen you drink at a party. If you do you’re normally one and done....Nothing wrong with it. Just an observation.” She says as she blows out the smoke and Annabelle takes a drag.

“I just like being in control of myself. Knowing all my decisions are mine through and through, not influenced by anything else. Mostly just at big parties like this. At smaller things I let loose; the things Molly has witnessed this semester, we’re definitely good friends now. Which, still a bit weird to say.” They continue to pass the cigarette back and forth. 

“I get that. It’s why I stay on the outskirts usually and watch.” Hope doesn’t mention the time she definitely didn’t stay on the outskirts and almost fucked Amy in a bathroom. Thankfully, that all worked out in the end. They continue to chat amicably as they finish their cigarette before they head back inside. 

Hope does a scan of the main room and clocks 5 different couples making out; two being Ryan and Nick and, surprisingly George and Alan—they must have talked and made up since graduation. However, her scan finds no short red head so she starts heading back into the ‘dance’ room, sipping on her drink and carrying Amy’s. Annabelle branches off and heads to another room.

As soon as she enters the room she spots Amy in the crowd and the smile that appears on Amy’s face let’s her know she’s seen her too. Amy leans over to say something to someone, probably Molly, then weaves her way through the crowd. 

“Hey! There you are.” Hope holds out Amy’s drink as she approaches and Amy takes it, but then leans up on her tiptoes and kisses Hope. 

“Here I am.” Hope says when they separate and then she notices Amy’s face scrunched up a bit.

“Did you smoke a cigarette?” Hope chuckles and nods.

“I shared one with Annabelle.”

“You know smoking kills, right? Nearly half a million people die from it every year, just in the states.”

“Yes, dear,” Hope says slightly sarcastically but is quick to amend her statement at the look on Amy’s face, “look, I only smoke cigarettes at big parties and I go to approximately 3 parties a year. It won’t become a habit.” 

Amy takes a sip of her drink. “Alright. Just...let me know when you’ve smoked so I’m prepared when I kiss you.”

“Wow, that bad, huh?” Hope raises an eyebrow.

“No! Just unexpected. You didn’t taste like...you.” Amy trails off as she finishes her sentence, looking a little embarrassed. Hope reaches up and pushes Amy’s hair behind her ear then cups her face. 

“Okay. I’ll let you know.” Hope is leaning in toward Amy when a pair of hands jerks them apart.

“Drinking games. Outside. Now. There’s only four hours left.” Gigi says intensely. Hope checks her phone.

“Gigi, the new year is in two hours, not four.”

“Huh? Who cares about the new year?” With that Gigi leaves and starts going around to other people, seemingly gliding around the room. Amy blinks, utterly confused. 

“Four hours u-until what then?” Hope shrugs. 

“Should we top off and go?” Hope watches Amy look around for a second and she follows her gaze to Molly who is sitting down across the room and talking to Jared. “...I’m not sure if that’s a conversation we want to interrupt. Up to you, though.”

Amy puffs up her cheeks a moment in thought before the air out of them, making her lips flap. “You’re right. I’m grilling her later though.”

“As is your wifely duty.”

“You’re the worst.”

“Yeah, but you still _like_ me.” Hope whispers in Amy’s ear as they walk over to the bar. Amy opens her mouth to respond but then closes it and Hope watches as a thoughtful looks passes over her face. Before she can ask about it Amy has changed the topic and Tanner is refilling their drinks, ready to join the drinking games himself.

There’s a bunch of groups of people playing different drinking games, and every once in a while people rotate around when they’re tired of one. Amy and Hope join a random group and Hope gets a front row seat to how competitive Amy can be. She’s just sitting back, really, sipping her drink accordingly while Amy wreaks havoc on everyone else’s livers. 

They’ve been outside for about twenty minutes when Molly and Jared finally join. Hope sees Annabelle, standing next to Nick, tilt her head and narrow her eyes as she looks at the pair. If Amy can’t get something out of Molly—which she doubts—maybe Hope could get something out of Annabelle.

They continue to circulate until they get to beer pong and it ends up being, god knows how, her and Gigi against Molly and Amy. Hope doesn’t do drinking games. Hope doesn’t do sports other than track. Gigi carries their team, but Amy and Molly are a solid duo. They absolutely destroy Hope and Gigi then proceed to do a seemingly choreographed, obnoxious (to some) victory dance. Gigi tries to get Hope to do a celebratory loss dance but Hope crosses her arms and shakes her head.

“No. No, absolutely not. Keep whatever is happening here far away from me.” Amy and Molly hear Hope from across the table, exchange a glance, and then are joining Gigi in her strange dance around Hope. “This is possibly the worst thing to happen to me. And that’s including the time Amy—“

“OKAY!” Amy immediately stops dancing and puts her hand over Hope’s mouth. Molly barks out a loud laugh. 

“Oh, you mean the time that she—“ Amy’s other hand finds a place over Molly’s mouth.

“I hate both of you.” Amy drops both of her hands, to reveal grin that can only be described as shit-eating on both Hope and Molly’s faces.

“No, you don’t.” Molly plants a kiss on Amy’s cheek and ruffles her hair up.

“Dude!” Amy fixes her hair before mumbling , “you’re right.”

During this entire exchange, Gigi still hasn’t stopped dancing and has in fact moved on top of the table they’re using for beer pong. At some point she had dragged a drunk George up there and now they are swaying together to some song or another in their heads.

* * *

The games continue until there’s only thirty minutes left until the new year. People then start to disperse; some wanting to find someone to kiss at midnight, some wanting to just relax a bit, and some wanting to ring the new year in with a _bang_ if you catch Hope’s drift.

Amy has gone off with Molly to chat, so Hope sits on one of the couches in the living room and half pays attention to the countdown on TV. She relaxes into the sofa and does the most cliche thing to do at this time of the year: she thinks back on where she was this time last year.

This time last year, she was still in high school. Gross. This time last year, she was severely apathetic. This time last year, she was still pining over Amy. This time last year, she hadn’t seen the world. This time last year, she hadn’t figured out what she wanted. This time last year, Hope didn’t know herself, only thought that she did. 

Over the past year, Hope has seen the world, good, bad, and ugly. She has figured out what she wants in life, or at least what she wants for herself in this moment. She has opened herself up to Amy, alarmingly wide. Over the past year, Hope has learned to find happiness in things, even when her mask of apathy is on; she at least knows it’s a mask now. Over the past year, Hope has learned who she is in many situations; she may not like who that is all the time, but she at least knows it’s her. Hope doesn’t think she’d change this past year for anything. 

At some point during her musings Hope must have closed her eyes. She feels a body sit next to her, a head rest on her shoulder, and then she smells Amy’s familiar scent. She can’t describe it, really, other than the fact that it’s Amy through and through. “Hey.” Hope rests her head on top of Amy’s and opens her eyes. According to the TV they’re down to two minutes. Amy hums in response and laces their fingers together. 

“I have to tell you something.”

“What’s up?” Hope squeezes her hand reassuringly.

“Sometimes I really like cliches.” Hope furrows her brows, confused.

“Okay? I mean, a lot of people do, me included. It’s why they exist.” As Hope finishes talking she sees the countdown hit thirty and people start to join in with the count down. Amy shifts and Hope lifts her head to let Amy move more easily. She turns to sit cross legged facing Hope on the couch. 

It’s when the countdown hits twenty that Amy gulps and opens her mouth again. “I, um—I love you.” Hope’s eyes widen in shock for a moment and she thinks she may have malfunctioned a bit in processing this information.

“Yeah?” She says a bit breathlessly, a smile she doesn’t even consciously make forming on her face. Amy nods.

“Yeah.” She cradles Hope’s face in her hands and gently traces her thumbs across her cheeks. Hope faintly hears the countdown from ten, but that is so far down her list of important things happening at the moment that she doesn’t care at all.

“I love you, too.”

“Cool.” Amy grins dopily and then leans in to kiss Hope right as the countdown ends and cheers of ‘Happy New Year’ erupt around them. When they pull back Hope chuckles.

“That really was so cliche.” Amy shrugs. 

“It just felt like a good moment.”

“It was.”

To go from that moment to being held in tight headlocks by a dramatically fake crying Gigi is not what Hope expected, but she’s also not surprised which probably should be worrying.

“I love you both so much!” She rapidly switches between kissing her and Amy’s head. Hope pats the hand that is slowly but surely choking her in comfort (?. She’s not really sure.) Finally, Gigi’s grip loosens and Hope watches as she can see Gigi mentally set her sights on Annabelle. It’s a fascinating thing to witness really, possibly equivalent to a lioness stalking her prey before pouncing. 

Amy pecks her on the cheek and then is up to go wish Molly a Happy New Year. Hope stands and figures she should make rounds if not to wish others a Happy New Year, then to at least acknowledge they exist. Wow, she marvels in a moment of self-reflection, look how far she’s come. A couple of people wish her a ‘Happy New Year’ and she nods in acknowledgment, even sending the wish back to some.

There’s some commotion and Hope turns to see Theo walking in the door. “Sorry I’m late, yo, this party still going?”

Tanner and Nick both yell out exclamations from separate sides of the room and then charge Theo, who just accepts the collisions as they fall into a heap. Hope can’t help but chuckle and shakes her head. Sure, some of these people might be idiots, but they’re all pretty alright.

Hope decides it’s probably not healthy for her kidneys or bladder to put off a trip to the bathroom any longer, so she heads down the hall to where she knows one is. Surprisingly there’s no line—everyone must still be mingling and celebrating the New Year—but the door is closed and locked. Hope leans against the wall and waits, looking down at the floor. A minute or so later, the door opens and a body walks out, immediately colliding with her. 

“Hey, watch i—“ she cuts herself off when she sees that it’s Amy who she’s holding by the shoulders.

“Oops. Sorry. Hi.” Amy laughs and Hope lets her arms slide down Amy’s arms.

“Hey...So we meet in a bathroom yet again.”

“I mean, technically we’re still outside of it. But...we could change that.” Amy steps forward and fists the front of Hope’s shirt. Hope bites her lip, super into Amy coming on to her, but _holy shit_ does she have to pee. 

“I really would at any other time, babe, but I _really_ have to go.” Amy snorts and covers her mouth as she snickers, stepping aside to let Hope by. Hope’s bladder doesn’t allow her the time to find the snort adorable. She walks past Amy and closes the door telling Amy, “be right back.”

Hope quickly relieves herself and washes her hands before stepping back outside to join Amy who is leaning against the wall opposite of the door. “You know, I think this has been the universe telling us that bathrooms aren’t our thing.”

Amy grabs her hand as they walk to rejoin the party. “I really think I could’ve told you that after the first time.”

As they walk into the room Hope makes eye contact with Annabelle who waves them over to her and Molly. Hope looks at Amy and they shrug at each other before walking over. 

“You guys wanna hitch a ride? Molly and I are gonna head out soon cause traffic will be crazy.” 

“Yeah, that’d be great. Thanks, Annabelle.” Amy responds and Hope nods.

“Don’t mention it. Just gotta go say goodbyes.” Annabelle starts to walk around to people saying goodbye and Theo groans in complaint when she says she’s leaving. Amy leans toward Molly raising her eyebrows rapidly. 

“Sooo….?” Molly glances between Hope and Amy and Hope gets the message; this is a best friend thing. She squeezes Amy’s hand before letting go.

“Haven’t seen Gigi in a while, gonna make sure she hasn’t been kidnapped or something.” Amy gives an appreciative nod before turning back to Molly. Hope sticks her hands in her pockets and walks from the room, figuring she might as well actually search for Gigi now. She finds her in the kitchen fast asleep draped across the island. Jared is sitting on top of the counter across from her, making sure she’s okay, and sighing some hefty heavy sighs.

Hope stands next to Gigi’s sleeping form and looks Jared up and down. “You okay, dude?” Hope can’t help if the phrasing sounds entirely unenthusiastic; her social battery for the night is completely tapped out. 

“Oh,” he looks at her, “hey Hope. Yeah. Yeah! I’m good. I’m great. I’m greeaaaat.” He attempts a grin that looks more like a grimace. Hope quirks a brow.

“Yeah. You really sound it.” Hope doesn’t know why she’s digging. Six months ago she would’ve taken the answer at face value and moved along, now she’s trying to be a better person or something. Honestly it’s kind of exhausting. “Is it Gigi?” The aforementioned girl twitches as if being summoned to consciousness by her name. Hope takes a half step back, just in case—for what she has absolutely no idea.

“Nah, no. Gig is fine. She’s just taking her nightly nap. I just...I have some things to think about.”

“Sounds dangerous. Good luck... and get her home safe.” Hope has reached the level of involvement she wants to have in the situation, so she nods and walks away, hoping that has given Amy and Molly enough time to talk about whatever they’re talking about. 

“Thanks. I, um, I will!” Jared calls after her and she raises a hand in the air in farewell and acknowledgement. On her way back she waves to a few other people, slowing to give the two girls more time to talk. She even waves at Ryan who smiles easily and waves back. The usual churning in her stomach at the sight of the other girl has almost entirely calmed.

When she walks back into the living room Amy and Molly are hugging and she spots Annabelle across the room probably waiting for them to finish too. As Hope sees them start to pull away she walks up as does Annabelle. 

“Ready to go?” Annabelle questions, swinging her keys around her finger. Molly and Amy nod. The group heads out and Nick spots them at the door, shouting a goodbye and prompting others to do the same. They wave goodbye and then head out to Annabelle’s car. Molly quickly slips into the passenger’s seat, and Amy and Hope slide in to the back. “Alright, where are we going first?” Annabelle asks as she turns on the car and pulls out from the house.

“You can head to mine.” Molly speaks up, her voice normal but just slightly clipped at the end enough to know something is up. Hope’s musings are interrupted as Amy grabs her hand and tugs her closer to whisper in her ear. 

“I think I’m gonna stay over at Molly’s tonight. She needs a best friend night.” Hope feels disappointment bloom in her chest, but immediately douses it. Molly is always gonna come first for Amy. She knows this, and honestly tonight Hope agrees that Molly needs Amy. Hope nods. 

“Okay. Will I see you tomorrow?” Hope whispers back, keeping her voice under the sound of the low radio. Amy nods.

“And if not tomorrow, then the day after.”

“Cool.” Amy adjusts, trying to rest her head on Hope’s shoulder but the distance is too far so her head just ends up bumping into Hope’s elbow. She pulls back with an embarrassed look on her face and Hope suppresses a laugh.

“Thanks for the head butt.” Amy holds her face in her hands and groans. Hope, having a much better trajectory, lowers her head to rest on Amy’s shoulder even if the position is awkward and entirely uncomfortable to do in a car. Hope feels Amy’s head come to rest on top of her own, and they sit in silence for the rest of the ride.

Annabelle pulls up in front of Molly’s place not too long after and Molly hops out of the car with a thanks and a bye. Before Annabelle can pull away, Amy tells her to wait. Amy pulls Hope in for a quick kiss and a murmur of “love you”, before hopping out of the car after Molly. Amy is gone before Hope has the chance to reply so she takes out her phone and sends her a text. 

_Love you too, nerd._

When Hope puts her phone away she looks up to see that they’re still parked, and Annabelle looking at her in the mirror with a raised eyebrow. “Trouble in paradise?”

Hope scoffs and then hops into the front seat over the center console. It’s a difficult task, but she threads the needle with her legs pretty nicely so it goes relatively smoothly. She buckled her seatbelt and turns to Annabelle. “I think I could ask the same to you tonight. What’s that about?”

Annabelle purses her lips and starts driving, heading to Hope’s house probably by the streets she’s taking. It’s silent for a while, Hope just looking out the window as the night flying passed and Annabelle just driving. 

“Fuck!” Annabelle exclaims and runs her hands along the steering wheel. Hope’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise for a second not having actually expected a response to her jab, but she schools her features before turning to look at Annabelle. “Okay. So maybe Molly and I have drunkenly kissed a few times this semester. And maybe we’re both a little confused about it and whether it means something to either of us. We’re trying to work through whatever this is, even if it’s just drunk experimenting, but I think seeing Nick and Jared just brought up even more confusion for her tonight. And I’m just...I don’t even fucking know. Do I like kissing girls? Maybe. I just like kissing, doesn’t really matter to me.”

“Wow. That’s a lot.”

“Yeah, and now I’m unloading onto you cause you’re the closest thing to a friend that I have here who would get it. _Fuck._ ” Annabelle lets out a deep breath. 

“Okay,” Hope starts slowly. “I don’t offer this often, but if you need someone to talk to about this—or whatever—you can text me. No guarantee I’ll respond or anything, but you can still get it out so you don’t explode on your next unknowing passenger.” Hope smirks a bit as she finishes her statement. 

“Shut up.” Annabelle rolls her eyes before squeezing the steering wheel in her hands. “Thanks.” She says more softly and Hope nods, turning her head back to look out the window knowing that’s all she and Annabelle really need. 

Annabelle drops her off and Hope drags her hand gently along Amy’s car as she walks up the driveway having forgotten that it would be here. Hope quietly enters her house, apparently only alerting Louie who simply lifts his head off the couch before lowering it again seeing it’s just her.

Hope makes her way into her room and quickly gets ready for bed, changing into her pajamas. She slides into bed and hugs one of her extra pillows to her chest. She thinks over the night and can’t help the smile that grows on her face and the warmth that starts in her chest when remembering Amy telling Hope that she loves her. She falls asleep soon after, dreaming of Amy.

* * *

The next two weeks go by much too quickly for Hope’s wanting. She and Amy hang out as much as they can, since they know it won’t happen again for at least six more months. She actually manages to read and make commentary for all the books she bought Amy at the bookstore. She hangs out with Annabelle once or twice just to grab coffee, but Hope finds they get along pretty well and have similar types of humor. She and Molly go out for lunch again and it’s actually enjoyable. Even Gigi just shows up at her house one day and they hang out, even if them hanging out was just Gigi falling asleep on Louie on the floor and Hope reading on the couch until she woke back up.

Hope having a full schedule is definitely new, weird, and honestly not entirely unwelcome. It’s actually kind of _nice?_ to be friends with these girls, which is something past Hope would rather vomit than say. Her parents notice too and ask her one day at dinner about her shockingly busy schedule. She shrugs.

“I don’t know. It just kind of happened.” Her dad laughs and pats her on the shoulder and her mom’s lips quirk up into a smile. 

“I’m glad you have friends now.” Her mom says before taking another bite.

“Yeah...me too.” And Hope finds that, surprisingly, she means the words.

* * *

Before Hope knows it, it’s the day before Amy leaves to go back to Botswana and 3 days before she, Molly, Annabelle, and Gigi set back off to the East coast. Amy’s leaving early in the morning, so they have to say goodbye today. Amy had lunch with Molly earlier, so Hope is able to have dinner with her, before they head back to Amy’s house for a group goodbye.

Dinner is great, if not too quick, and then Hope is driving Amy back to her house. Hope pulls into the driveway and parks the car, but makes no move to get out. Amy unbuckles her seatbelt and reaches for the handle before she pauses seeing Hope not following.

“What’s up?” Amy settles back into the seat, turned towards Hope.

“I’m just not sure if we’ll get anymore time to ourselves tonight, which is fine, but I just want to say something while it’s just us.” Amy nods and takes Hope’s hand.

“Okay. Go ahead.” Hope opens her mouth to talk but stops and blows out air instead, flapping her lips. She drops her head back against the headrest and looks at the ceiling.

“God, vulnerability is the worst.” Amy barks out a laugh and pokes Hope in the side.

“Thank you for telling me this in our final moments alone for months.” Hope rolls her eyes.

“I think I’m rubbing off on you too much.” She mutters before taking a deep breath and continuing. “I’m gonna miss you. Like a lot. And I’m really glad we were able to spend these weeks together...and I love you.” She throws it in for good measure; she’s exposing her vulnerability here in a heartfelt farewell so she might as well go for broke with it.

“Back atcha.” Amy says, shooting finger guns at Hope before immediately face palming. “Wait! _No_. Let me try that again, please.” Amy looks down at her fingers as if they’ve betrayed her with their use of finger-gunning and Hope has to fight not to laugh. “I’ll miss you a lot too, but I’ll call and text whenever I can.” Amy leans forward to peck Hope on the lips. “Love you too.”

“Cool,” Hope smiles, “now we can go face everyone.”

Hope gets out of the car and Amy follows after before they walk into the house together. Molly is already there and sitting with Amy’s parents, talking about her time at Yale. 

“So then, in the middle of the lecture hall I corrected—Hey Ames! Hope.” Hope nods at Molly in greeting.

“Hi again, Mr. and Mrs. Antsler.” Hope gives a slightly awkward wave and Amy’s parents smile.

“Hope! How are you?”

“Hi, honey.”

Doug and Charmaine answer at the same time, their attention shifted directly to Hope. “I’m good,” Hope answers slowly and a bit unsure, “not sure if I’m ready to go back to school yet but here we are anyway, I guess.” She slides her hands into her pockets and internally cringes at how awkward that interaction just was—she really doesn’t do parents well.

“Oh, we understand that. Don’t know if we’re ready to see our Amy leave again, but here she goes regardless.” Doug says and gets up to envelope Amy in his arms. Charmaine gets up and joins in on the other side, Hope stepping back to allow Amy’s parents to cocoon her. Her dad exaggeratingly and repeatedly kissing the top of her head with a “mwah!” as her mom squeezes her tightly.

“Is Ling-Ling still taking good care of you?” Her mom says as she rests her cheek on top of Amy’s head. Hope watches as Amy’s cheeks flush and Molly almost chokes on laughter from on the sofa. 

“That’s—I...um...okay! I have to finish packing so we’re gonna go to my room, now.” Amy untangles herself from her parents and quickly walks off toward her room. “C’mon!” Hope follows after Amy, a bit confused. Molly joins her, still laughing, until they get to Amy’s room, and she flops down on the lower bed.

Hope sees that Amy is mostly packed with a few piles of clothes still scattered around and the stack of books that she’s given Amy. Hope crosses her arms and leans against the wall. “So who’s Ling-Ling?”

Molly opens her mouth but before she can even get a word out a shirt is thrown in her face and Amy is looking at her with a glare of embarrassment. “Don’t. You. Dare.” Amy says before turning to Hope. “She’s no one.”

Molly drags Amy’s shirt off of her face and tosses it back to her. “I wasn’t even going to say anything! What kind of best friend would I even be?” Amy narrows her eyes a bit before nodding and going back to her packing.

“Yeah, so that entire exchange did nothing to sate my curiosity.” Hope says mostly because watching this exchange is amusing and not because she really wants to know. “My mind will just go wild at the possibilities. Long lost twin? Pet monkey? Great aunt? Secret wife?” 

Amy’s cheeks are still red when she responds, “No, I only just have the one wife.” Hope chuckles.

“Damn straight!” Molly says from her position on the bed.

“Alright then, keep your secrets.” Hope smirks, but it drops when Amy and Molly’s heads whip up to look at her. “...what?”

“Did you just quote _Lord of the Rings_?” Molly asks, incredulously. Hope shrugs, playing it off.

“I like Tolkien as much as the next person.” Molly’s mouth drops open in surprise and Amy’s drops open in...something other than surprise judging by the look in her eyes.

“You continue to surprise me.” Molly says and looks at Hope in approval while Amy gulps, shakes her head and gets back to packing. 

“What time is your flight again tomorrow?” Hope asks even though she already knows, as if the time will change if she asks Amy again.

“Nine. So leaving here by six.” Hope scrunches her nose up in distaste of the answer. Amy finishes packing her clothes and starts looking through the pile of books. She grabs four from the pile and puts them in her suitcase. “I’ll save the others for when I get back.” She says mostly to herself but loud enough for Hope and Molly to hear. She adds the remaining books to her bookshelves and then claps her hands together. “Okay! Done!”

“You sure?” Molly says from the bed. “You got everything? Toiletries? Chargers? Mace?” Amy slaps her hand down on her bag, producing a nice sounding thud.

“Yep! It’s all in there. Now! It’s documentary time.” Hope rolls her eyes goodnaturedly as Amy goes to join Molly on the bottom bed. Amy and Molly squeeze together and Amy pats the other side of her pulling her laptop up onto the desk next to the bed and opening it. “C’mon.”

Hope raises an eyebrow. “Yeah no, as if I’m fitting there.”

“Hope, you better squeeze your butt in there or you squeeze your butt in next to me. Those are your two options.” Molly phrases it as a threat and Hope kinda takes it as one. She placating puts her hands out and she crosses the room in two easy strides. She considers the bed for a moment tilting her head and figuring out how her limbs are gonna fit. 

“I just wanna make sure I get the geometry right.” Molly straight up cackles at the comment and Amy drags a hand down her face as she groans. “Yeah, no. There’s no way I’m gonna fit in there, plus I’m the tallest, why am I gonna sit directly under the bunk?”

Molly and Amy exchange a glance and Molly shrugs. “You make a good point.” Molly and Amy wrap their arms around each other and Amy rolls to the other side bringing Molly along with her, depositing her in her new spot. Amy pats Molly’s old spot for Hope to sit in.

“There. No more excuses.” Hope huffs out a laugh and sits next to Amy as she adjusts the pillows behind them. She folds one leg up onto the bed so the sitting is more comfortable but she still shifts a little, trying to get in a comfortable position. After a few attempts at adjustment Amy just lifts Hope’s other leg and drapes it over her knee, “Come on, bring that long limb over here.” Hope sees Molly stifling a laugh from the corner of her eye.

“Dork.” Hope says fondly, able to lie back on the pillows more comfortably now.

“I take that as a compliment. Now Molly, will you do us the honor?” Molly grins with excitement and presses play on the new documentary that she and Amy had watched together and _loved_ the first time so they’re watching it again.

Amy and Molly are immediately zoned in on the documentary, attentively watching but adding some commentary and discussion of their thoughts this second time around. Hope is watching, but not nearly as attentively; it’s keeping her interesting for the most part at least. Honestly, she’s content enough to just be here as the two best friends discuss one particular historical factoid to the next.

Hope’s attention shifts suddenly from the documentary to her thigh where Amy’s hand has been resting for most of the film. Amy is in the middle of discussing something particularly passionately with Molly, and she has subconsciously started rubbing her thumb along Hope’s— _thankfully_ —clothed thigh. Even so, Hope doesn’t want her body reacting in _any_ of that type of way when she’s on the same bed as Molly so she slides her own hand down her thigh to hold Amy’s, occupying it for the time being.

The discussion comes to a lull when there’s maybe forty-five minutes left in the documentary. During that lull, Amy moves their hands onto her lap and just starts playing with Hope’s hand absentmindedly as she pays complete attention to the documentary. Hope thinks they must be a pretty funny sight at that moment; Hope’s leg draped over Amy’s, Amy holding and playing with Hope’s hand, Molly’s head resting on Amy’s shoulder, and Amy resting her head on top of Molly’s. Hope wonders, since Amy’s parents had thought she and Molly were dating for years, what they would think of this situation.

Amy eventually moves her hands down to Hope’s wrist and starts playing with her many bracelets before she must recognize her own handiwork. She plays with the bracelet she made Hope and Hope smiles, watching for a minute before looking back at the screen. 

The documentary ends not too far later and Hope has to admit it’s pretty good and she actually enjoyed it. As the credits roll the girls all sit in silence, knowing that it is getting close to the time to say goodbye. Hope hears Molly take a deep breath.

“What’s six more months?”

“I’ll be back before you know it.” Hope doesn’t like to intrude on the pair’s moments, but she thinks if she moves that will be even more intrusive. One of Amy’s hands moves from playing with Hope’s and grabs one of Molly’s. Hope can see them squeeze each other’s hands tightly, knuckles going white at the pressure. After a minute or so Hope watches as the pressure releases and Amy and Molly start to untangle themselves so Hope does as well.

The three stand up from the bed and face each other in a triangular fashion in the middle of the room. Molly wraps Amy into a very tight hug; they bury their faces into each other’s necks. Molly pulls back, holding onto Amy’s shoulders. “You are the most beautiful, smart, courageous, and wonderful woman in the whole world. I love you so much. You better continue kicking ass all day every day and you better call me.”

“Duh.” Amy interrupts.

“Now I’m gonna go through a whole thing in the car. Hope, I’ll talk to you soon.” Hope nods as Molly gives Amy one last hug before heading out, leaving just Amy and Hope. Hope clears her throat and tilts her head at the door.

“I should probably head out too...let you sleep.”

“Yeah...yeah, probably.” Amy says with no conviction in her words.

Hope quickly closes the space between them and connects their lips, kissing Amy passionately. Hope puts as much into it as possible since this will be their last for months. Before getting too carried away though, Hope pulls away, giving Amy one final peck, and then separates. Their chests heave, slightly out of breath from the lengthy kiss. Hope pushes some hair behind Amy’s ear.

“I’ll see you soon, okay? And talk to you sooner.” Amy nods.

“Yeah, yeah. Definitely.” Amy smiles—although Hope can tell it’s a bit strained—and takes Hope’s hand, walking with her to the front door. Hope says bye to Amy’s parents from where they sit in the living room. When it comes to the moment to say goodbye, Hope simply gives Amy another peck.

“Love you.”

“Love you too.” Hope smirks and walks backwards away from Amy down the driveway before finally turning around and throwing a hand over her head in a wave like she’d done months before. She gets in her car and drives home, ignoring the slight clench of her heart. 

* * *

By the time she gets home it’s almost eleven. She hops in her bed, brining Louie with her to keep her company. She looks through her social media on her phone; she checks it once a day just to see if anything has happened. Usually it hasn’t. 

However, this time, when she opens up Instagram she has a notification that she’s been tagged in something. She clicks on the notification and it brings her to something that Amy has just posted. It’s a photoset—the first picture being one of Amy and Molly—with the caption ‘just a few things I’m gonna miss’. Hope scrolls through the photoset, laughing at some of the pictures of Molly and Amy’s parents. She swipes to the next picture still laughing at an obvious screenshot of a Snapchat that Molly had sent Amy, and her laughter immediately subsides. She’s looking at her own face.

Now, logically Hope knew she was gonna be in here somewhere, but while looking through the other pictures she kind of forgot. She’s also never even seen this picture of herself before. It was obviously taken by Amy in the passenger seat since she’s driving in it. Hope is resting her elbow on the doorframe and her head in her hand as she’s driving. She looks content, facing forward, but the sunlight frames her hair and profile beautifully. Hope isn’t sure if she’s ever seen a better picture of herself.

Hope swipes to the next picture to see another one of her from the same day—this must’ve been from when they went to the bookstore. In this picture her mouth is open in a smile, and Hope suspects Amy sniped this picture when she got her to sing. Hope screenshots both of the pictures, her heart warm, and then types out a reply under the photoset. _You’re ruining my reputation._

Directly after, she exits out of Instagram and opens her messenger to text Amy. _Wish you were here._

She doesn’t get a response so Hope rests her phone down on her chest, assuming that Amy has already gone to sleep for the night. She settles further into her bed, trying to find a comfortable enough spot to fall asleep in when there’s a knock on her window. Quirking an eyebrow she gets up and moves over to the window, moving the blinds a bit to see Amy shifting nervously on her feet. Hope smiles and opens the window letting Amy climb in. 

“Oh thank god, I started to second guess myself that this was your window.” Amy makes her way through the window almost gracefully and Hope closes it behind her. Amy wipes her hands down her pants as Louie excitedly goes to greet her. She kneels down to pet him and let’s Louie lick her face. Hope smiles.

“Not that I don’t appreciate the visit—I’m definitely sure Louie does—but shouldn’t you be asleep? Flight in eight hours and all that.” Amy looks up at Hope and shrugs before standing again.

“I can sleep on the plane. Plus, you wished me here. There are...better things for me to be doing right now.” Hope bites her lip.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Amy says a bit breathless and steps closer, pulling Hope toward her at the same time by her shirt. Amy leans up to kiss Hope but at the last second Hope turns her head to the side, so that Amy only kisses her cheek.

“Wait. Just one second.” Amy pulls away from her, confusion clear on her face as Hope steps away and opens the door to her room, ushering Louie out and closing it behind him. “Now. Where were we?”

“You really stopped yourself from kissing me to let Louie out of the room?” Amy raises an eyebrow at Hope. Hope walks over and sits on her bed.

“Did you want him staring the whole time? Cause I certainly didn’t. Now, are you gonna come over here or not?” Amy nods.

“Yeah. Yep. Absolutely, I am coming over there.” Amy quickly closes the distance between them and straddles Hope. Hope wraps her arms around Amy’s lower back without thought, holding her there. Hope leans up to connect their lips, sliding her tongue along Amy’s bottom lip. She pulls away with a satisfied hum and brings her mouth close to Amy’s ear.

“Let me give you something to think about during your nights in Botswana.” Hope nips at Amy’s jawline and she hears the shuddered breath that Amy lets out. Hope holds one hand securely on Amy’s back and uses the other to encourage Amy’s legs to wrap around her waist, keeping one hand firmly on Amy’s thigh. “Hold on.” She says into Amy’s neck that she’s kissing and biting down. Hope stands, easily carrying Amy who finally gets the message and her legs wrap more tightly around Hope’s waist.

Hope doesn’t go far, simply turning them around and climbing onto the bed before lowering Amy down onto it. As she settles Amy down she lifts Amy’s shirt, letting her finish take it off, and unbuttons Amy’s pants sliding them down her legs, pulling off Amy’s shoes as she does. That all done she settles on back on top of Amy and hungrily captures her lips.

“Mmm...not fair. You still have all your clothes on.” Amy gets out in between kisses and Hope once again starts kissing down Amy’s body. She pauses and scrapes her teeth along the skin right next to Amy’s bra.

“I have my sleep shirt and shorts on, but...there’s nothing on underneath.” Hope deftly reaches under Amy, undoing her bra and sliding the straps down and tossing the bra to the side. She kisses Amy’s chest rubbing her tongue over one of Amy’s nipples as her hand comes up to massage the other. 

Amy’s hands run up her back, sliding underneath her shirt, and then drag down as she moans, arching up into Hope. Hope eventually kisses down Amy’s sternum and stomach until she nips at Amy’s pelvis, sucking a bit at the skin there. Amy’s hands tangle in Hope’s hair as Hope hooks a finger around Amy’s underwear and slowly pulls it down. As soon as she has the underwear off, Hope resettles between Amy’s legs and gently pushes them further apart, giving each inner thigh a gentle kiss and making Amy gasp.

Hope then turns her attention to where Amy needs her most right now and drags her tongue through her labia. Amy’s hands immediately tighten in her hair, tugging at it, and Hope smirks. “Just like that, babe. I forgot to grab a hair tie.” She lets her tongue circle Amy clit, flicking against it a few times before she wraps her lips around it and sucks a bit. Amy’s breath is ragged and she brokenly moans Hope’s name as she pants. 

It’s only when Amy’s thighs start to tighten around Hope’s head that she slides two fingers slowly into Amy. Amy arches her back and gasps when Hope starts to move her fingers in and out of her. Hearing Amy’s breath start to get more unsteady, Hope knows she’s close, so she curls her fingers inside Amy right as she reattaches her lips to Amy’s clit. Amy’s moan goes silent as she tenses and stills before melting into the bed. Hope slides her fingers out of Amy and leaves open mouthed kisses up her body until she’s straddling her.

Hope looks at Amy’s flushed face as she puts her fingers in her mouth, sucking them clean. Amy’s chest heaves and her mouth flaps open and closed at the display. “Holy... _fuck.”_

Hope smirks and leans down to kiss Amy. “Well, I don’t know if it was biblical.” Amy just hums into the kiss.

“You’re amazing.” Before Hope realizes it, her eyes wide in surprise (and arousal) Amy has rolled them over and is hovering above her. She must have a questioning look in her eye because Amy answers a question she doesn’t even ask. “Self-defense classes. Now, where were we?” Hope can’t help but smile at Amy’s cheekiness, quoting her from earlier, as she connects their lips. Hope never wants this to end, which is a frighteningly vulnerable thought for her to have but she’s able to forget about it for the moment, focused solely on how Amy is making her body feel.

* * *

Later, they lay in bed, re-clothed, holding each other. Hope slowly runs her fingers through Amy’s hair as Amy rests her head on her chest. “I’m really glad you kicked Louie out earlier. I wouldn’t be able to look him in the face anymore.” Amy says out of nowhere and Hope chuckles.

“See? I told you.” Hope glances at her alarm clock at her bedside and sees it’s almost 3:30 by now. “You should probably get going soon…” Hope feels Amy’s grip on her tighten a bit.

“I know.” Hope rubs her hand up and down Amy’s arm, understanding how she’s feeling.

“Yeah...me too.”

Eventually, Amy gets up to leave and she walks to the window again. Hope laughs.

“You know you can go out the front door, right?” Amy shrugs.

“This is easier...and I’ve always wanted to climb in and out a girl’s bedroom window.”

“Well there’s one off the bucket list.” Hope says softly and cups Amy’s face, rubbing her thumb along her cheek. Amy closes her eyes and leans into Hope’s hand. “Text me when you land, okay?”

Amy nods, “yeah, I will.” Hope kisses Amy’s forehead before kissing her gently on the lips and—holy _shit_ has she become a softy. She ignores the little annoying voice in her head that tells her she’s always been this soft on the inside. 

After the kiss, Amy opens the window and crawls through, waving at Hope one last time before getting into her car. Hope keeps her window open until she sees Amy drives away. Only then does she close and lock her window, drawing the blinds again. She slips back into bed and buries her face in her pillow, letting Amy’s smell surround her, lulling her into comfort and then eventually sleep.

* * *

The next few days pass pretty quickly consisting mostly of hanging out with her parents, packing, and messaging with Molly, Annabelle, and Gigi in the new group chat that they have. It’s weird but…nice. Not that Hope would outwardly admit that to any of the girls.

Annabelle messages her separately to tell her that she and Molly still haven’t talked, but they at least seem better on the friendship side of things. Hope just wishes that nothing erupts during the trip back to school.

In the group chat they decide to leave at 8 the next morning in order to get a good start on the day. Hope finishes packing up that night and sits down to have dinner with both of her parents; her mom was able to get away from work at a reasonable time that day. Her dad makes stuffed peppers and they sit around the table talking about their days and the classes Hope is taking this coming semester.

Hope doesn’t have to declare her major for a whole year, but she’s done a lot of thinking and she thinks she’s started to pinpoint what she wants to do. After seeing the world and all the stories that have to be told in it, she’s considering going into journalism. This way she also gets to call people out on their shit for a living too, which she can definitely do.

She tells her parents her thoughts and they are fully behind her which feels very nice.There’s a lull in the conversation before her dad speaks up again. 

“We really like Amy, honey.”

“Such a sweetheart.” Her mom agrees nodding.

“Yeah, me too...I can’t wait until she’s at Columbia next year. She’s gonna do some great things.” Hope keeps her eyes on her plate as she talks, taking another bite of pepper.

“And she’ll be right across the street from you.” Her mom supplies the thought for Hope.

“Yeah,” the right side of her mouth quirks up into a smile and she looks at her mom, “that too.”

Hope gets a text from Amy later that night telling her that she’s landed safe and sound. Hope isn’t sure how her heart can feel both lighter and heavier at the same time.

* * *

Annabelle pulls up outside of Hope’s house at 8:15 the next morning. Hope says a quick goodbye to her dad, squeezing him in a hug, and pets Louie, giving him a kiss on his head. She hikes her backpack and guitar case over her shoulder and heads outside, placing her backpack and guitar in the trunk of the car and hopping into the passenger seat. 

“You picked me up first?” Hope asks as she buckles her seatbelt.

“No,” Annabelle says as she pulls away from Hoe’s house and starts driving, “Gigi is asleep in the back.” Hope glances over her shoulder and sees no one asleep on the seat until she looks down and sees Gigi curled up asleep on the floor of the car. Hope looks at Annabelle questioningly and she just shrugs. “She insisted. Plus I kind of didn’t want to pick Molly up first.” Hope just hums and nods. 

They pull up in front of Molly’s place twenty minutes later and Annabelle honks the horn a couple of times. Molly exits her place almost as soon as the last honk finishes and goes through the same motions as Hope: walking to the car, throwing her stuff in the trunk, and opening the back door to get in.

“Gigi, what the fuck. It is too early for this.” Gigi just shushes Molly and Molly rolls her eyes, climbing into her seat. “Alright, let’s get this on the road.”

Annabelle pulls away from Molly’s place and heads for the interstate. Being in the passenger seat, Hope is in charge of music for now, so she plugs the aux cord into her phone and plays one of her many playlists.

During Annabelle’s time driving everyone stays pretty quiet, still partially waking up and Hope is content to just listen to music and watch the outside rush by. They don’t stop until they cross over into Arizona and then Annabelle pulls into the first restaurant she sees.

Gigi takes some rousing but all the girls climb out of the car and head in to eat. They each devour their meals and talk a bit about what their next semesters look like, but it’s an overall pretty calm and quick affair. 

Annabelle continues driving until late afternoon where Hope takes the wheel. Annabelle falls asleep in the back and they start the same cycle that they did on their way over. 

* * *

It isn’t until they get back around to Annabelle driving and Hope in the passenger seat when they’re in Oklahoma that Hope glances in the backseat to see Molly asleep with her head on the window and Gigi asleep with her head on Molly’s shoulder. Hope looks at Annabelle, who is tapping along to the music on the steering wheel.

“So…” Hope starts and Annabelle shakes her head.

“No. Nope. Absolutely not.” Hope puts up her hands placatingly. 

“Alright. Just saying you won’t have buffers in a couple hours.” Annabelle huffs and Hope settles back into her spot, looking out the window.

The rest of the trip passes much more quickly than the trip there, the deadline of having to get back before school starts having a definite effect. They have some nice conversations and laughs, especially when Gigi decides to stick her head out the window, seemingly forgetting that they get winter on the east coast and it’s January. By the time she brings her head back it her nose is running, her eyes are watering, and her cheeks are red.

Molly is the one driving by the time they reach New York late in the night. Hope offers her floor if they all want to rest and head out in the morning but both Molly and Annabelle decide they’d rather just stick it out. Gigi says she’s going all the way to New Haven with Molly and Annabelle and then hitchhiking up to Harvard. By the concerned and shocked look that Molly sends Gigi’s way Hope knows she’ll try to convince Gigi to do otherwise.

Molly pulls up out front of the gates to Barnard and parks the car. Hope climbs out of the back and pops the trunk, grabbing her backpack carefully. She closes the trunk and peeks her head back in the car. “Thanks guys, and uh...if you’re ever in New York this semester let me know. I don’t mind all of your company.” That’s as close as Hope allows herself to saying that she likes having them as friends.

“Aaaawwwww!” Annabelle says exaggeratingly at the same time as Molly says, “you _like_ us.”

Gigi just makes very intense eye contact for a few seconds before finally blinking and nodding, “Good. I’m glad you understood my message.”

“Uh...yeah. Anyway, drive safe.” Hope shuts the car door and sends one final wave before she walks through the gates and to her dorm.

She tries to be as quiet as she can since it’s pretty late, and slowly swings her door open when she reaches it, closing it carefully behind her. She places her bag on the ground and reaches into it, gingerly taking out Amy’s Christmas gifts, placing the bottle of sand on the shelf above her bed and the picture frames on her desk. She sheds her clothes and pulls on pajamas before climbing into bed, completely fine with unpacking and showering tomorrow. She takes out her phone and sends a text to Amy.

_Made it in one piece. Wish you were here._

The response is almost immediate.

_Good. Me too <3\. _

Hope falls asleep with her phone on her chest.

* * *

The semester starts up and this one is much like the last, except now Hope misses Gigi, Annabelle, and Molly a bit as well as Amy. Hope decides that having friends is overrated if you spend most of the time having them missing them. Surprisingly, they keep the road trip group chat going and Hope talks with the girls individually as well.

The day before classes start, nearly everyone is back in the dorm so it’s nice that it doesn’t feel like a ghost town anymore; the first day Hope thinks she was the only person here because it definitely felt like it. Hope is just sitting on her bed, absentmindedly playing “Teenage Dirtbag” on her guitar when there’s a knock on her door.

“It’s open!” Hope calls out and pauses her strumming as the door opens. Kelly peeks her head in through the door before fully entering.

“Hey!”

“Oh, hey, how’s it going?” Hope puts her guitar aside, happy to see a familiar face but also hit with a bit of guilt that they barely talked over break.

“It’s good! Yeah, break was nice. I’m guessing yours was too—didn’t hear from you too much.” Hope winces internally, she’s really not too great at this friends thing.

“Yeah, sorry. My girlfriend came back from Botswana for the month and surprised me so I got a bit distracted. Also turns out that not everyone from back home sucks...who knew right?” Hope smirks at her own joke, but when she looks at Kelly her face has dropped a bit from the happy look on her face earlier.

“Girlfriend?” Kelly questions and Hope tilts her head in confusion—she’s definitely mentioned Amy to Kelly before, right? She thinks back on their conversations and her eyes widen a bit when she realizes that she hasn’t. She just hasn’t come up in conversation yet in the times they’ve hung out. Hope really hopes she isn’t about to lose a friend over misread signals. 

“Yeah, Amy. She’s in Botswana,” she leans back in her bed far enough to point at the small heart drawn in Botswana on her tapestry, “she’s helping women make their own tampons, and then she’s going to Columbia in the fall.”

Hope watches as Kelly’s eyes flick quickly around her room, most likely picking up on the other touches of Amy spread throughout it including the new presents from her. Kelly bursts out into laughter and covers her mouth to try to suppress it.

“Oh my god, how did I not see it? You’re so totally in love with her.” 

“Well, I uh….yeah.” Hope says when nothing else comes to mind; it’s not like she has any right to deny it.

“Now that solves why you were picking up on none of my signals.” Hope blinks at the sentence. Okay, so definitely misread signals. “She sounds amazing though—Amy.”

“Yeah. She is.” Hope says so easily even though she’s a bit out of her depth in the rest of this situation. “So, like, are we good? We’re still friends, right? I don’t really know the procedure when this happens.” Hope mentally rolls her eyes at herself ‘know the procedure’? Who is she? Her mother?

“We’re good. Don’t worry. But uh, we actually have a floor meeting in like two minutes. It’s actually why I came to get you.”

“Oh, okay,” Hope stands and crosses her room, “lead the way, I guess.”

Kelly walks out of the room and Hope follows, relieved to have avoided drama and the loss of a friend. 

* * *

After the meeting when Hope is back in her room, she gets out her phone and texts Annabelle mainly because she doesn’t really know who else to text. 

_So one of my only friends here didn’t know I had a girlfriend and was definitely coming on to me without me realizing until I mentioned Amy off-handedly._

Annabelle answers almost immediately.

_LOL. Dude you’re so into Amy you didn’t even realize another girl was trying to make a move on you?_

_Shut up. It’s probably gonna be weird now._

_Probably, yeah. At least for a little bit. That’s gotta be a blow to this chick’s pride._

_Why did I even text you?_

_Hell if I know._

_Well this can work both ways. How’s Molly? Make out recently?_

_Anyone ever tell you you’re a bitch?_ Hope laughs at that reply.

_All the time. Doesn’t answer my question though._

_Good. And no. Not that you’d deserve an answer._

_Alright, well you know when to reach me if it does happen._ Annabelle’s only reply to that is the middle finger emoji. Hope just snickers and switches over to her conversation with Amy. She knows Amy is definitely asleep right now, so she texts her a _Morning. How was your day yesterday?_

Hope picks her guitar back up and starts to strum another song, humming out the tune as she does.

* * *

Unfortunately, Annabelle is right and the next few times she and Kelly hang out are a bit awkward. Eventually, though, it seems like they’re back where they were and Hope tells Kelly all about Amy. They hang out pretty frequently and at least see each other every day with them being neighbors. Hope’s just glad she hasn’t lost the one friend she’s made in college so far. She still keeps mostly to herself, but she’s actually started to get to know the other girls on her floor and not just observe them through her open door as they walk past.

A couple of the girls on her floor are in the same seminars she’s in, so sometimes they get together to study or go over some things. Hope would not say that they are friends by any means, but they’re definitely some form of acquaintance.

It’s during one of these study sessions that she gets a text from Amy—which isn’t anything out of the usual, she gets texts from Amy whenever the other girl is available to text. She opens her phone, reads the message, and had she been drinking or eating would have promptly choked. She must’ve made some noise in the absence of actually choking and a couple of the girls look at her, questioning.

“I’m fine. Just a bit of a cough.” This seems to sate the other girls’ curiosity as they go back to their business sometimes piping up with a question or two for their work, but Hope remains entirely focused on the text from Amy.

_So quick question, what’s your stance on phone sex?_

Hope probably spends a good three minutes just reading the text over and over again to make sure it’s something that she’s actually seeing. By the time she’s moving to answer another text comes through. _Sorry if that was abrupt._

_It’s okay. I can choke on my tongue in front of my peers. My stance is absolutely._

_Cool._

_The absolutely part, not the choking part. Please don’t do that._

_Um, do you wanna try tomorrow 11 my time, 5 yours?_

Hope scans through the rapid fire texts and raises an eyebrow. _Are you scheduling our phone sex? Also then I can have dinner and a snack._

_Yeah, otherwise our schedules will get in the way. Especially with the time difference. And that’s possibly the cheesiest thing you’ve ever said._

_Fair point. And it’s important to have well-balanced meals._

_Oh my god. Stop._

_I’m just saying, midnight snacks are good too._

_You’re the worst._

_And yet you love me._

_Yeah, I do._ Hope smiles and feels her heart warm at the text. Even though they’ve said it to each other multiple times and in person, it still doesn’t get old. Hope still feels that deep happiness and warmth every time like her body and heart knowing that it’s found its place. 

_Now who’s being cheesy?_

_You started it._ Hope places her phone down, realizing she’s been out of the study loop for probably a bit too long and gets herself back in, picking up where she left off. 

* * *

Hope is catching her breath, her phone resting next to her head on speaker. She can hear Amy’s deep breathing on the other side of the phone as they both rest in the moments after their orgasms.

“So…” Hope hears Amy say from the other end of the line and smiles with a breathy laugh.

“Yes?”

“How was that for you? Was-is—would you, um, wanna do that again?” Hope closes her eyes and she can picture Amy in this moment, still a bit nervous but completely sincere and wanting Hope’s comfort even if she’s an ocean away. She also almost laughs at the phrasing; it brings her right back to that bathroom and certainly one of the bigger surprises in her life.

“Good—really good. Definitely down to do that again. You?” Hope turns on her side toward her phone.

“Fuck yeah.” Hope hears Amy laugh a little on the other end of the phone with her exclamation.

“Love the enthusiasm.”

“Yeah, well, it’s you so…”

“Smooth Antsler. Very smooth.”

“I try.”

“I know you do.” Hope chuckles at the squeak of indignation she hears through the phone.

“Hey!”

“What? I think it’s cute that you try to be smooth, babe.”

“I _can_ be smooth.”

“I know.” Hope says this with sincerity and they both just rest for a moment, listening to each other over the phone. “Wish you were here.”

“Yeah,” Amy hums, “me too.” There’s another pause before Hope speaks up again.

“You should go to sleep.”

“You should eat dinner.”

“Well, I already had a pretty big snack so…”

“Oh my god, stop talking.” They both laugh.

“Night, Ames.”

“Night.” Hope doesn’t immediately hang up and neither does Amy, just staying on the line a little bit longer before Hope rolls her eyes at herself for being that person and reaches out to hang up the phone. 

Hope rolls out of bed and straightens out her clothes, running a hand through her hair a few times before grabbing her things and heading down to the cafeteria.

* * *

Hope sits down, placing her plate down on the table in front of her. She digs into the pasta in front of her; it’s one of the only good food options available on campus. Mid bite someone bumps into her back, and she just manages to keep herself from choking. She turns to see a girl glaring at her friend who then profusely apologizes to Hope.

“Yeah, whatever. It’s fine. Just watch it next time.” Hope turns back to her food and continues each before someone slides into the seat across from her. Kelly sits across from her with a bottle of iced tea and a piece of cake on her plate.

“You’re in a good mood.”

“What makes you say that?” Her voice stays even and uninterested as she quirks an eyebrow.

“You didn’t even rake that girl over the coals even a little bit for knocking into you.” Hope shrugs. 

“I’m tired, didn’t feel like putting in an unnecessary effort.” Kelly just hums and look at Hope a bit unbelieving. Hope just ignores the look and goes back to eating her pasta. 

* * *

It takes seven weeks for Hope to get the text from Annabelle.

_It happened again._

“Well, shit.” Hope closes her book when she reads the text and puts it aside. 

_And? Did you talk about it?_

_No, of course not._

_Dude._

_We’re roommates! It’ll get really fucking awkward if we have to talk about it. I don’t wanna deal with that._

_Bet it’ll be more awkward if you don’t._

_Fuck off._ Which Hope knows is Annabelle speak for ‘I’ll think about it’ so she picks up her book again and resumes reading.

* * *

Midterms come and go with only slight suffering. Hope barely talks to Amy the entire week because she’s so busy writing essays and exams. The only times she does manage to speak to Amy are when Amy checks in to tell her to eat, get some rest, and share some of her study techniques with her. Thankfully, Hope gets through midterms in one piece and everything settles down again.

That is, until Hope is walking back from lecture one day and suddenly a form jumps on her back. She immediately tenses ready to flip her attacker onto their back until she hears their voice.

“This place is pretty swanky, I had to climb over three different gates.” Hope groans but just keeps walking with Gigi draped over her back.

“Would it kill you to text me before you show up?” Hope ignores the strange looks from her peers and even some of the girls on her floor as she walks down the hall and outside with a girl on her back. 

“And lose the mystery? Never.” Hope rolls her eyes at the very Gigi answer.

“And you couldn’t wait until spring break because…?”

“Jared and I are sailing to the Bermuda Triangle to see if we can contact the aliens that kidnapped me when I was seven.” 

“Oh, of course.” Hope makes her way across campus. Gigi has fallen silent and a quick glance at her side confirms that Gigi has fallen asleep on her back. This girl must seriously be some degree narcoleptic because she falls asleep at the most unexpected times and the strangest of places.

At least Gigi has the decency to come on a Friday after Hope’s last class, although how she knows Hope’s schedule is still a mystery to her. No one is at the security desk yet, so Hope is able to sneak Gigi in on her back and into the elevator—thank god there’s an elevator because Hope would not make it up the stairs. When she gets to her room, Hope deposits Gigi onto her bed haphazardly and stretches her shoulder and back. That was her workout for the entire week. 

She takes out her phone and takes a picture of Gigi sprawled over her bed and sends it to the road trip group chat and to Amy. _I have a visitor._ She sits down at her desk and reads a book, content to sit there until Gigi wakes up.

Twenty minutes later Gigi is still asleep and Kelly pokes her head in the door. “You gave a girl a piggy back ride all across campus?” Her eyes then fall in Gigi’s form and she makes a sound of understanding. “Okay. That makes sense.”

“Yeah, Gigi decided to drop in for a visit. Almost literally.” Hope dog ears her page and sets the book down. 

“Sounds exciting.”

“Usually is with her.”

“I remember you.” Kelly startles as Gigi speaks, eyes still closed. Her torso slowly lifts as if she’s levitating and then she finally opens her eyes. Gigi looks Kelly up and down before nodding. “Good, you’re finally over your crush.”

Kelly’s mouth drops open in surprise. “Well, I um…” She looks at Hope who just shrugs, she never knows how Gigi knows what she does. 

“Let’s go eat. I’m starving.” Gigi scoots off the bed and Hope almost laughs at the look on Kelly’s face; she looks like she’s gotten whiplash at how quickly the conversation has changed course. Hope, knowing arguing will do nothing to stop Gigi, grabs her wallet and head to the door. “Let’s go.” Gigi hooks her arm with Kelly’s and starts dragging her out the door and, surprisingly, in the right direction. This time Hope does chuckle as Kelly looks around helplessly as she dragged off by Gigi, Hope following along behind them.

Gigi stays the weekend and it’s actually pretty fun beyond Gigi completely hogging the bed. Hope thinks that by the end of the weekend Kelly and Gigi have become friends by whatever capacity that means to them. As everything with Gigi tends to be, the weekend is a whirlwind and Hope wakes up to an empty bed on Monday morning. There’s a calligraphed letter on the pillow beside her which seems to be stained paper—all in all, a very Victorian aesthetic. The letter thanks Hope for the ‘joyous’ weekend but that she must now leave and rejoin the warfront.

Hope has to give Gigi props for sticking to a theme incredibly well, even if she kind of feels like she just had a one night stand and they left before she woke up. She takes a picture of the letter and sends it to Amy.

_Gigi ‘heart-felt lettered’ me and left without a trace._ Hope takes the letter and places it on her desk. She appreciates the craftsmanship and doesn’t want to toss it.

_Wow, that’s dedication._ Amy’s reply comes a few minutes later while she’s gathering her stuff to head to the showers. 

_Yeah...and I feel used? Or maybe sad? I don’t know the letter hit something deep and nostalgic...maybe from a past life where I was a war widow._ Hope leaves her phone and heads to the shower, quickly getting ready for the day even though she doesn’t have a class till eleven, which is a nice break from the 8:30s. 

Twenty minutes later she’s back in her room, dressed and reading for the day. She hikes her bag over her shoulder and grabs her phone as she heads out the door to get food. She checks her phone as she walks across campus to her usual coffee spot. _You’re such a nerd._

_My reputation begs to disagree._ Hope orders her usual cappuccino and croissant sits down at the corner table by the window, content to people watch until she has to go to class. 

_Your reputation doesn’t know you very well._ Hope smiles into her cappuccino when she reads the text, feeling unusually warm this almost spring morning. 

* * *

The next week is spring break and Hope’s plans involve lounging around, reading, playing guitar, and maybe smoking a couple of joints. Nothing too crazy—she’s not really the crazy type. The first day she sleeps in until noon. Talk about party times.

When she finally rolls over in bed, body naturally waking up instead of waking up to an alarm, she stretches her arms up over her head and arches her back with a satisfied groan when her back cracks. Wiping the sleep from her eyes she grabs her phone and looks through her notifications. Nothing much on social media since she never really uses it other than to look through other peoples’ posts. 

As usual, there is a text from Amy waiting for her. _If I pirate an episode of Girls Gone Wild will I be able to see you this week?_

Hope rolls her eyes playfully at the message and responds. _1\. That show isn’t on the air any more. 2. Do you really think I’d be wild enough to get on that show?_

_I don’t know, I’ve never seen you go full out of control. Who knows what you’re capable of with that much power. And it’s spring break in college, isn’t it like required to party at least a little hard? Not that I’m saying you have to party—this is more of a rhetorical question._

_I don’t think I’ve seen out of control Hope either...parties are a lot less enticing when the possibility of almost having sex with you in a bathroom is removed ;)._

_With the disasters revolving around that I’d think that’d make them more enticing._ Hope laughs aloud when she reads the message and gets out of bed knowing she should probably start her day.

She and Amy continue to text intermittently throughout the day, but mostly Hope reads on a bench outside now that most of the snow has cleared. After living in Southern California her whole life, snow is something that Hope still finds some wonder and beauty in, even after being surrounded by it for months.

It’s nearing dinner time when her phone buzzes in her pocket. She expects a text from Amy but isn’t disappointed when she sees it’s from Kelly instead. _Dude, where are you?_

_Reading outside, why?_

_Was just gonna ask if you wanna go to a party at NYU on Wednesday, a buddy of mine who goes there invited me and I don’t really want to go alone._

Hope reads the text and then rereads the text. She thinks on her conversation with Amy throughout the day and about going to a party where she would know absolutely no one. She could do whatever or be whoever she wanted and would never have to see anyone ever again after it. She could have a lot of fun with that and mess with a lot of people, plus it’d be an interesting opportunity to people watch at a college party. Plus she could always just leave if she didn’t like the vibe.

_Sure, why not._ She finally responds after thinking it through and Kelly’s response is immediate and enthusiastic.

_!!!!!!! Yes!!! ur the best!_ Hope thinks that if this qualifies her as the best that the bar must be really low, and then she updates Amy about her plans.

_Be safe and smart!!!_ Is Amy’s response, which is very Amy. Hope reminds her that the party isn’t for another two days but Amy just reiterates her response. She then also tells Hope that she’s about to start _Sharp Objects_ finally because she will be actually able to find the time in the next couple of days.

_Have fun._ Is Hope’s cryptic reply. 

* * *

The next morning Hope gets a simple: _what. The. Fuck. WHATTHEFUCK !!!!_ Hope laughs. 

_I know, right?_

_I STAYED UP ALL NIGHT TO FINISH IT._

_Babe, it’s a book. It has chapters for a reason._

_I needed to KNOW._

_Holy. S h i t._

_I thought it was her but then I didn’t and then she turned it back around on me. Unfair!_

_But so good._

_We should watch the miniseries together when you get back. Amy Adams plays Camille._

_Ummmmmmmmm absolutely. I’ve never wanted to do something more in my life._

_Ouch. Second place to a miniseries._

_Who says you’re second? Throwing a murder mystery party is definitely up there for me._

_And the dagger is thrust deeper._

_You’re definitely top five though._

_Thanks._

_< 3_

Hope sends the eye roll emoji and then a heart after it. Waking up and being able to have an entire conversation with Amy are her favorite kinds of days.

* * *

The next day Hope does much of the same, lounge around and play guitar, picking up a book to read around midday. Amy periodically throughout the day has been sending her a checklist of things to remember which includes, but not exclusively: hand sanitizer, chapstick, mace, taser (if available), portable cellphone charger, brass knuckles (if available), and Advil. As much as Hope might wish for a taser or brass knuckles, she has absolutely no idea how to get her hands on either of those things and tells Amy as such.

After she has dinner she gets ready for the party which is really just changing her shirt and pulling on her favorite jacket. She sits and plays her guitar, waiting for the text from Kelly saying that she’s ready to go. 

Finally, around 8:30 Kelly tells Hope she’s ready to go and they meet out in the hallway when they leave their rooms. They leave the college and take the subway to the other campus. During the ride Kelly tells Hope about her friend and about how the party is in an apartment building just off campus. The walk from the subway to the apartment is a bit brisk but pretty quick, so all in all not too bad. Hope can see the apartment that they’re headed to from street level based on the lights flashing through the window. They get in the building and take the elevator up with a couple of other party goers. Kelly is friendly with them and chats on the ride up while Hope just hangs back and leans against the wall.

The elevators open right into the apartment which is pretty cool and _holy shit_ it’s a nice apartment. Hope has no idea how a student is affording to live here; the only possible way that her mind comes up with would be parents paying for it. The music is really loud and the lights seem to be timed with the beat. She and Kelly step inside and Kelly immediately brings her to the bar, which _thank god_. This vibe is a bit too much for her to handle entirely sober. Hope immediately does a shot of whiskey before getting a mixed drink. Kelly basically has to talk to her ear in order for Hope to hear her say that she is going to go search for her friend. Hope nods and sends her a thumbs up.

Hope starts off on a patrol around the party while she drinks, looking at the different areas and just observing the general dynamic of the group. It’s different to the one back home, everyone here is displaying so intensely about money and relationships that Hope can see it without even talking to anyone. There is still beer pong, though, so that grounds her a little bit that it is just a college party still no matter how it is dressed to appear. 

It’s a large studio apartment, so there’s not many places for privacy and the vibe is the same throughout the party since it’s all one room technically. Hope sees Kelly talking to someone who must be her friend across the room. If this party achieves nothing else, at least Kelly has been able to meet up with her friend.

Hope heads back to get another drink and makes it a double. Spring break and all that. As she’s getting her drink she spots a couple of people coming in from what looks to be a balcony and Hope’s interest is immediately piqued. She was going to just pick her favorite wall and lean against it, but being outside sounds like a much better idea, even though it’s still kind of chilly out. Plus, she can smoke one of the joints she brought. 

She weaves through the crowd pretty easily and makes it to the balcony entrance, sliding the door open. A cold breeze immediately hits her and she shivers, but with her jacket she can handle it for long enough. The balcony is an alright size, there’s a couple sitting very close to each other and whispering in each other’s ears but it’s big enough that Hope doesn’t feel too awkward being out there with them. Not that she would leave for them if she did feel awkward. 

She leans against the side of the balcony and grabs a joint from her pocket. It takes a few times to light with the wind and Hope has to turn into herself and shield it for it even to catch. Hope takes a big hit, really trying to get it started and to keep it lit. She blows the smoke off the balcony and watches it dissipate into the air. She turns back around to the couple and holds the joint out.

“Either of you want?” The couple startles a bit at being interrupted but they decline the offer and Hope shrugs before taking another hit. She usually smokes alone mainly because before a couple months ago she had no friends, but if someone is there while she’s smoking and they haven’t done anything to annoy her, she’ll offer. 

Not long after the couple heads inside, shivering a bit at the prolonged time outside, Hope also feels the cold getting to her a little bit, so she finishes the joint off as quickly as she can and heads back inside with her drink. The warmth of the apartment from all the people inside is instant relief from outside. The warmth settles in her and a little bit of Hope thinks of home. 

Going back to her primary objective she picks her spot, hopping up to sit on a countertop and watches the party. She finishes her drink quickly and just sits as she starts to feel the effects of the alcohol and weed. She’s still functional but she’s definitely feeling it, and she realizes hasn’t been this intoxicated in a while. 

Hope is enjoying making up stories about people that she sees around the party when she feels a body hop up next to hers. She turns her head to see a yuppie looking redheaded guy in a suit. Hope raises her eyebrow, unimpressed before turning back to the girl who she thinks is trying to be a social media influencer but failing. Maybe her friendships are suffering because of this?

“Hey, I’m Noah. Are you having fun?” The guy sitting next to her speaks up and scoots closer. Hope sighs.

“It’s alright, I guess. Not really my scene.”

“No, it doesn’t look it. You look a bit too cool for this.”

“Yep.” Hope pops the ‘p’.

“I’m just here because one of my buddies is the host.” Hope scoffs at the flex. 

“I’m happy for you.” Hope says with a tone so flat there is no other interpretation other than she doesn’t mean a word. Hope turns to look at him, glare prepared, but suddenly the light hits his hair and the color makes Hope think of Amy. God, she really misses her girlfriend and her red hair and cute freckles and—Hope is horribly displaced from her thought of Amy by Noah grabbing the back of her head and pulling her into a kiss.

She is stunned only momentarily before shock is over taken by anger. She tries to pull away but his hands are keeping her in place as he tries to slip his tongue into the forced kiss. Hope pushes him with all her might in the chest, forcing him off of her. “WHAT THE FUCK?” Hope rubs at her mouth with the back of her hand as if it can remove the feeling of his mouth and remove the last twenty seconds from her night. “What the _fuck?”_

_“_ Woah, relax. It was just a kiss.” Hope pretty much sees red and pushes the yuppie hard so that he falls off of the counter and onto the floor. She hops down off of the counter, landing on the guy’s hand, and stalks off. 

“Fuckin’ douchebag.” She feels her chest tighter and the party seems to be all too much at once, so she calls the elevator and leaves. She texts Kelly while she’s in the elevator to tell her that she had to get out of there and that she’ll see her back at the dorm. After she finishes the text, she realizes her hands are shaking—no, her entire body is shaking. 

Her fingers move as if on autopilot, and before she knows it she’s holding her phone up to her ear and walking out of the elevator and building. Her feet just start taking her to the nearby Washington Square Park as she listens to the phone ring. She isn’t quite sure when the ringing stops and when Amy’s sleep-addled voice comes over the line.

“Hope?”

“Hey.” Hope breathes out shakily as she finally reaches the park and takes a seat. She hears some shuffling on the other end and then a much more alert Amy. 

“What’s wrong?” Hope feels a lump form in her throat as she opens her mouth. She squeezes her eyes shut and shakes her head.

“Nothing—nothing. I’m sorry for calling. It’s like 6 in the morning there. I’ll just talk to you later.”

“Don’t you dare hang up” Hope hesitates but stays on the line, “...what happened, babe? Don’t worry about me, I was gonna get up soon anyway.”

Hope opens her eyes to look around the park, the cool air on her skin is refreshing. She takes a deep breath and lets out a sigh, but Amy just patiently waits on the other end.

“There was this guy at the party, and he...grabbed my face and kissed me. And I-I couldn’t pull away but then I pushed him and I pushed him onto the floor and then I just left...I’m okay. Just _angry_.” Hope is shaking with anger and so many emotions; she doesn’t realize she’s crying until she feels the teardrops fall onto the hand fisted in her lap. The other end of the line is quiet for a moment. 

“You have _every_ right to be furious. That should have never happened, I’m so sorry.” Amy’s voice is low and serious, Hope can hear the anger slipping through it. 

“I just—ugh.” Hope runs a frustrated hand through her hair.

“I really wish I was there...so I could know you’re okay tonight.”

“Me too...but I’ll be okay.”

“Will you?” Hope takes a deep breath, realizing how much she’s calmed down just by talking to Amy. She nods to herself.

“Yeah. I will be.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” Hope sighs out and feels some tension leave her body. As if Hope’s heart is relieved at the admittance that Amy still loves her.

“ _Please_ get home safe. Message me when you do but also if you need anything. I can try to swim across the ocean; I don’t know how far I’d get to be honest, but I would try.” Hope gives a dry chuckle as she wipes her face clearing away remaining tear tracks. 

“I will. And please don’t, you definitely would not make it.”

“That!...yeah, is pretty fair.” Amy laughs lightly.

“Thanks for picking up.”

“Of _course_...I’ll talk to you later okay? And remember! If you need anything, don’t hesitate.”

“Mhm. Bye.” Hope waits for Amy to say bye as well before hanging up and walking to the subway station. 

She sees that she has two texts from Kelly and opens them. 

_I heard about what happened. Are you okay? (You broke one of his fingers so good on you)_

_Do you want me to break his face?_

_Just got off the phone with Amy. I’m alright. Good, he fucking deserves it. And I definitely wouldn’t be opposed to it._

_Oh thank god, I was starting to worry. I’ll see what I can do. Get home safe._

_Will do. You too._ Hope puts her phone in her pocket and gets on the train. She stares out the window and lets her mind go blank, just watching the lights in the tunnels pass by. 

She makes it back to her dorm in one piece and texts both Amy and Kelly. She changes out of her clothes and uses a bunch of mouthwash in another attempt to clear away the feeling. Hope isn’t sure if it works or not. She crawls into bed and tries to fall asleep as she holds her pillow close to her.

* * *

Amy checks in the morning after to make sure Hope is okay, and she is—really. Just angry. When Kelly gets back to the dorm the next morning, she’s sporting a bruise on her fist and a satisfied grin on her face. It eases Hope’s anger a bit. 

After that Hope decides she’s partied out for a while. She spends the rest of spring break reading and playing guitar like her original plan. She texts the road trip group chat to see what they are all up to. Gigi says that she’s made it to the Bermuda Triangle with Jared. Molly and Annabelle don’t have the same spring break week as Hope, so they’re both currently busy studying. 

_“Studying”,_ Hope sends the message separately to Annabelle and receives an actual picture of Annabelle flipping her off for it. 

_Talk yet?_ Hope responds and Annabelle’s answer is the same picture again. _So that’s a no._

_Fuck off._ Hope does, having had her fun, and picks up where she left off in her book. 

The rest of spring break goes by uneventfully. She and Kelly hang out and explore the city, finding a couple of hidden gems including Hope’s new go-to bookstore. It nowhere near as elaborate as The Last Bookstore; it’s quaint and quiet and right up Hope’s alley.

Then, spring break is over and school comes back at full force. Should Hope have studied over the break? Possibly, but it’s too late for that now and she’s not worried anyway. Her grades are perfectly fine and she’s still pretty on top of things.

Hope goes back to her schedule of reading, hanging out with Kelly, relaxing, and going to class. So really nothing changes other than the going to class part. She has a couple of big essays and projects due at the end of the term so she tries to start what she can now, just so she’s not in over her head. Hope might not be the most passionate about school (about most things, really) but she knows how to manage her time and she knows what she’s capable of, which makes for a good combination. 

* * *

The only bump in the road comes on a Friday afternoon a couple weeks later in the form of a text from Annabelle. _I’m on my way._

_Okay._ Hope replies because really, she doesn’t know what else to say to that. Something obviously must’ve happened. Hope can’t even deal with her own emotions well let alone other people’s emotions, so she calls in help. And by that, she messages Amy. 

_Hey, so you know about Annabelle and Molly right?_ The response comes almost immediately; normally Amy is lying in bed right now so Hope expected a quick response just not _that_ quick.

_How do **you** know about them?_

_Annabelle._

_Oh, makes sense. How long have you known?_

_New Years. Anyway, that’s not important. I think something happened and I am emotionally inept with other people._

_What happened? And you aren’t emotionally inept with me._

_…I gently bullied you for years because I didn’t know how to handle having a crush on you._

_Okay, point seen._

_And idk what happened exactly, but Annabelle is on her way to me right now practically unannounced...basically you just might wanna check in or something? Idk._

_Awwww you care about them and wanna be a good friend._

_Yeah yeah yeah. We’ll see how that goes when I open my mouth._

_You’re cute when you care._

_Shut up._

Amy replies with a kissy face. Then another message comes through after. _I’ll check in, make sure nothing’s been destroyed._

_Thanks. <3\. _There are so many things about Amy that Hope admires, but one of the biggest things is how genuinely she cares about everyone and everything. Seemingly such a contrast to the apathetic persona that Hope puts on most of the time. Hope loves that Amy cares so much for Molly, even when she sometimes perceives that care and attention to be disproportionate, and that she cares so much about people that she’s constantly fighting for the rights of everyone. Hope just one day hopes that she can climb that list of things that Amy cares so much about to maybe even be equivalent to Molly. 

Amy doesn’t add anything else to the conversation, so Hope assumes she’s messaging Molly. Hope has nothing else to do but wait the couple of hours for Annabelle to get here, so she opens her laptop and plays _Parks and Rec_ on Netflix while playing her guitar.

About an hour and a half later Hope gets the message from Annabelle letting her know that she’s here. As soon as Hope opens the door to the dorm building to let Annabelle in she’s storming past her into the dorm and Hope follows after. “I’ve honestly had it! I’m done. I can’t deal with this any—wait, where the fuck do you live?”

Hope chuckles as Annabelle stops short in her walking and turns to face Hope. “Hey. Welcome. Nice to see you. My room is this way.” Hope leads Annabelle up the stairs and to her room.

“Oh, don’t be a bitch about it. You know you would’ve never said ‘welcome’ and ‘nice to see you’.” Hope just shrugs with a small smirk on her face. When she gets to her room, she pushes the door open and extends her arm out. 

“ _Welcome_ to my place.” Annabelle rolls her eyes at Hope’s emphasis on the welcome and walks in dumping her bag on the floor and flopping onto the bed. Hope closes the door behind her and walks over to sit at her desk. “Gigi did the same thing.”

Annabelle doesn’t respond and just lays on the bed, so Hope just grabs one of the books she has on her desk and starts reading it, or rather rereading it. Not that she really cares because right now it’s just something to pass the time with. She gets about 5 pages in when Annabelle finally says something.

“We talked.” Hope just puts the book down and turns toward her bed with a raised eyebrow, encouraging her to continue. Annabelle flips over onto her side to face Hope. “Didn’t go well.”

“Could have guessed that.” It slips out before Hope can stop it, but she relaxes a bit when she remembers who she’s talking to. Annabelle barks out a laugh.

“Right, it’s not like I come for day trips often.” Annabelle sighs. “So, I told her we needed to talk about whatever was happening. She said we didn’t. Said that people make out with their friends all the time and that it’d be fine. I got mad. I left.”

Hope wants to point out that Molly has never made out with Amy, but she isn’t sure if that’ll help or hurt in this situation so she doesn’t say anything about that. “So you didn’t talk to each other, you talked at each other.”

Annabelle levels her with a look that can only be described as unimpressed. “Okay, Dr. Phil. You try talking to Molly to get her to talk about something she doesn’t want to; it’s like talking to a wall.”

“I’d rather not...do you even know what you want from this anyway? Clarification? To stop? Something more?” Hope tilts her head and leans back further in the chair. Annabelle huffs and shuffles her position. 

“I...don’t know.” Annabelle says almost begrudgingly and then rolls back onto her back, looking at the ceiling. Hope shrugs and picks her book up again, continuing where she left off and giving Annabelle time to think. “I think just clarification right now is what I want. Whatever we’re doing is fun and I don’t necessarily want more, Y’know? I just wanna know that _something_ is going on more than just ‘accidentally’ making out with your roommate”

Hope lifts her eyes from her books to look at Annabelle. “That sounds fair.” Annabelle groans and meets Hope’s gaze. 

“Stop sounding so reasonable.” Hope laughs.

“You want me to be unreasonable? I can—” Before Hope can continue her sentence her own pillow hits her in the face, smushing the book she’s holding up against her in the process. Hope calmly puts her book down on the desk and then chucks the pillow back at Annabelle. “You wanna sit and mope or do you want food? Cause I’m hungry.”

Annabelle is quiet for a moment, just staring at the ceiling until she abruptly sits up and hops off the bed. “Fuck it, I could eat.” Hope stands from her seat, grabs her wallet, and walks to the door, opening it for Annabelle.

“Let’s go then.” Hope and Annabelle leave her room and head out of the dorms. Hope spots Kelly walking back to the dorm and gives her a small wave as they approach. “Hey.”

“Hey,” Kelly says coming to a stop in front of Hope and Annabelle, “is Gigi hiding somewhere in the dorms today?” Kelly quirks an eyebrow and looks around the pair suspiciously. 

“I don’t think so, but you honestly never know. Just Annabelle for the moment.” Hope motions to Annabelle and then from Annabelle to Kelly. “This is Kelly.” Hope watches Annabelle give Kelly a once over and then nod.

“Nice to meet you.”

“Likewise! See you later?” Hope nods as Kelly moves around them to head into the dorm. She and Annabelle continue walking, Hope leading them off campus to a restaurant.

“It was her, wasn’t it?” Hope glances at Annabelle, already knowing what Annabelle is referring to.

“I don’t really have many friends for it to have been, so yeah.”

“Well, at least the awkwardness didn’t seem to stick.” Annabelle sounds a bit thoughtful and Hope just nods in agreement, actually happy of the fact.

The two friends, Hope feels alright in calling them that now, have dinner together. They don’t talk about anything big but it’s fun, and when Annabelle leaves later that night she thanks Hope. Hope just shrugs. “Don’t worry about it. Wasn’t doing anything tonight anyway.”

Annabelle smirks. “See you around.”

Annabelle leaves and Hope isn’t sure if she helped her, but she doesn’t think she worsened anything. That’s a win in her books.

Hope gets a text from Annabelle the next day saying that she and Molly talked and figured things out. Hope just sends a thumbs up emoji, not knowing what else to say. She doesn’t know what they figured out, but she hopes whatever works out.

* * *

Hope is in the middle of typing up an essay in her room when her phone buzzes. She’s been on a roll, so she ignores it trying to finish off this page. It takes about half an hour for her to decide she’s done enough to take a break. She grabs her phone and unlocks it, going to her messages and opening her chat with Amy. 

The image that greets her is a selfie of Amy in a hospital bed and gown with an awkward smile and a thumbs up. The message underneath just says _I lived bitch._ Hope is immediately throwing her laptop off to the side and sitting up in bed as she waits for the phone to ring. 

Amy picks up after the second ring and Hope doesn’t even hear her greeting before she speaks. “What the fuck!?? What happened? Are you okay?”

“I’m good! I’m okay—I’m fine. I’m okay, I promise. I just maybe broke my ankle.” Amy rushes out from the other end of the line. Hope lets all the air out of her lungs in an attempt to calm her racing heart, and takes a deep breath. She falls back down onto her bed, panic passing as she realizes that Amy truly isn’t in any immediate danger.

“Jesus Christ Amy, you really thought that was the best way to tell me you broke your ankle? By sending me a picture of you just _in_ a hospital? With no further explanation?”

“I’m sorry. I can see now how that might’ve been a bit off-base—“

“A bit?”

“—but I was trying to reenact that meme. It just seemed like an opportune moment. I swear if I was in any real danger I wouldn’t just reenact a meme to you.” Hope can still feel her heart calming down as Amy speaks.

“Don’t worry me like that. _Fuck_. I think I just lost a couple of years.” 

“Really, _super_ sorry.” Hope sighs.

“It’s fine. Just maybe make sure I know the next meme you try to reenact before you do so.”

“Sounds good.” Hope feels some of the tension leave her body before she remembers that Amy is still in the hospital with a broken ankle.

“Babe, how the fuck did you break your ankle?” She hears Amy laugh nervously over the line.

“I, um...I,” Hope hears Amy make a defeated sigh before speaking up again, “I tripped down a flight of stairs.” Hope can almost hear the disappointed frown on Amy’s face as she speaks.

“Well, at least it was just the ankle.”

“Yeah, that’s why I’m still here. They did a bunch of scans to make sure everything else is still in top shape.”

“Good...so are you gonna be rocking the boot or the crutches? Or those new scooter type things that I’ve seen some people use?”

“I’m gonna be rocking a crutch boot combo for the next six weeks.”

“Oooo, that’s hot.” Hope smiles as she hears Amy laugh from the other end of the line. 

“Bone fractures do it for you, huh?”

“What can I say? I’m bad to the bone.” Hope deadpans and Amy full on snorts.

“You did _not_ just say that! Oh my god. One of these days I’m gonna tell everyone what a nerd you are.”

“No one will believe you. You have no permissible evidence.”

“Okay Ms. my mom is a lawyer, we’ll see.” Hope just hums.

“Will you still be in your boot when you get back?”

“I should definitely be okay by then. Hopefully, if all goes well. Wow, I can’t believe it’s coming up so quickly! Three more months.”

“...I can’t wait. Wish you were here.”

“Me too.” For a minute they just exist together over the phone, not speaking but just being there until Amy speaks up again, voice quiet as if she doesn’t want to shatter whatever moment they’re in. “Hey, I have to go do some other tests now, but I’ll talk to you later, okay?...love you.”

“Okay, let me know how they go. Love you too.” The line disconnects and Hope drops her phone to her side and runs her hands down her face, groaning at the rollercoaster of the past few minutes.

She needs a drink, a joint, or some other version of stress relief. There’s no way she can get back to working on her paper right now. She grabs the current book she’s reading from her desk and heads out to her spot on the Columbia campus to enjoy the nice spring break and try to relax. 

* * *

The rest of Amy’s tests go fine and her ankle heals perfectly over the next six weeks. Hope is frequently sent pictures of Amy’s crutches and boot along with updates of the increase of itchiness. Amy still goes to work since most of the time she’s already sitting while helping the women make the tampons anyway, so she’s happy about that at least.

The week that Amy gets her boot off is the same week as Hope’s finals, so she is completely swamped with finishing up essays and studying. Hope really can’t believe that her freshman year has gone by so quickly, let alone that she’ll see Amy again in a month and a half, _and_ Amy will be with her at school in the fall. Hope submits her last paper the day before her last final and proceeds to cram what she can about that final with Kelly, who is also in that class.

The final comes and goes, and with it so does the end of Hope’s freshman year. Hope does what she can in the final, and she thinks she does alright all things considered. She and Kelly go out to dinner to celebrate the end of the year and then head back to the dorm to hang out. They talk about summer plans, Hope lets Kelly know that she’ll have a place to stay if she wants to come out to LA from New Jersey. Kelly tells Hope that she’ll legitimately think about it. Hope promises to actually stay in touch with her this time around.

“You fucking better, I’m like, your only friend out here.” Kelly narrows her eyes a bit but then smiles. Hope chuckles and shrugs.

“Yeah...you’re right.” The day goodnight and Hope heads back to her room next door to start packing. Her parents are getting to the school sometime tomorrow afternoon to help her bring all of her stuff back to school. She’s already talked to everyone else in the road trip group chat and they are all pretty much in the same boat with parents coming in some way or another to help them pack all their stuff up. 

Luckily, Hope still doesn’t have too many things. She hasn’t accumulated much over the year other than more books, which honestly was anticipated. She takes all of her clothes out of the closet and drawers of the dorm, folding them and putting them in the boxes that she’s had stashed at the bottom of the closet and underneath her bed all year. One of the boxes is almost entirely books with Amy’s Christmas gifts placed delicately on top. She slips her guitar up into its case and rests it against her bed. All in all, it only takes a little over an hour before her room is almost entirely packed up and she’s going to bed.

When she wakes up she gets food and then goes to say goodbye to Kelly, not really knowing the exact time her parents are going to show up today. Kelly only has about a two hour drive back home, so her parents aren’t coming until later tonight. Hope knocks on Kelly’s door and seconds later the door swings open her friend leaning against the frame of it. 

“Hey, just wanted to say bye now cause I don’t know when I’ll be heading out.” Hope sticks her hands awkwardly in her pockets, not really knowing how to say goodbye. She’s never really been good at them. Kelly rolls her eyes at Hope good-naturedly—at least, Hope thinks so—and pulls her into a tight hug. 

“God, you’re bad at this. How do you have a girlfriend?” Kelly laughs, Hope takes her hands out of her pockets and wraps her arms around Kelly, patting her back a couple of times.

“I’m hot and she likes my standoffishness, makes me mysterious.” Hope grins as they pull back from the hug. 

“Yeah right. I’ve seen you talking to her—I would classify that as the opposite of standoffish. More like enamoured.”

“Should’ve seen me in high school. I was a master at both...anyway, I’ll talk to you soon, but have a good summer.” Hope waves anyway since that’s just what she does and walks back into her dorm. She looks at the boxes surrounding her and sighs, not too shabby of a year in all.

Her parents get there at around two in the afternoon and she and her dad immediately start packing up the car while her mom is on a work call. Even with just the two of them it only takes about thirty minutes before Hope is doing a final sweep of the room, making sure she has everything before heading out of the dorm and squeezing into the one spot left for her in the car. 

Her mom finishes up the call and spins around in her seat. “Hi honey, how are you?” She reaches into the back seat to give Hope’s knee a squeeze before turning back around to rebuckle her seatbelt as Hope’s father starts to drive, wanting to get as far as possible before having to call it a night. 

“Good, I’m good. Yesterday was my last final and that went pretty well I think…”

“Read any good books lately?” Her dad makes eye contact with her in the rear view mirror and she nods.

“Oh yeah.” This spurs an hour long conversation between Hope and her father about all the books that they’ve read recently, with her mom chiming in here and there with a couple that she’s read as well. Conversation flows nicely in the family, and when there are lulls her dad just turns up the radio.

Once it gets to be eleven, they are on the hunt for a hotel or a motel—really anywhere to stay for the night. They find a Holiday Inn right past Cleveland that they stop in for the night. It’s basic and fine for the night, much better than a motel would be.

The next morning they set off after grabbing complimentary breakfast at seven. It’s an early rise, but Hope just goes right back to sleep as soon as they’re in the car and her mom starts to drive. She doesn’t wake up until they stop for lunch and then after just listens to music while watching the midwestern landscapes pass by. Spoiler: it’s a lot of corn.

That night they stop in the middle of nowhere at a motel near the world’s biggest something or other. This bed is much more uncomfortable than the last, but Hope makes do. 

They set out again at seven, Hope once more taking a nap in the car until they get breakfast since the motel didn’t have anything. Depending on their pace today they could make it home. Hope really wants to sleep in her own bed and curl up with Louie, so she votes for as little stopping as possible.

Her parents, thankfully, are of the same mindset, and even though they have to drive into the early morning hours, it is worth it just to pull into their driveway and see home. “We’ll unpack tomorrow.” Her dad says through a yawn as they all crawl out of the car. “No early morning for anyone tomorrow, and that’s a rule.”

“No complaints here.” Her mom ruffles through her purse until she finds her keys and opens the front door, practically stumbling in due to her tiredness. Hope hears Louie runs for the door and his body immediately erupts into wiggles upon seeing her. Hope basically walks inside and falls to the floor next to him, allowing Louie to bombard her with kisses.

“Goodnight.” Her parents says pretty much in unison as they walk off to their bedroom.

“Night.” Hope returns, although it is probably blocked by Louie. Finally, Hope pushes Louie’s face away and gets up. “C’mon, boy.” She trudges to her room, strips, and changes into a pair of shorts and a shirt that she left in her room over the semester. She climbs into bed. Louie hops up and joins her, laying his head constantly on her stomach. Hope tangles her fingers in his fur, petting him gently until she drifts asleep.

* * *

Hope stays home and does nothing but sleep and read for the first week of her summer vacation. No one else who she really wants to interact with is home yet, so she catches up on lost time with Louie. He’s just about as talkative as she is though, so for the most part it’s companionable silence. Hope thinks it’s why they’ve always been so close, Louie just gets it.

The next week Hope gets a job at a nearby hole in the wall bookstore and she honestly couldn’t be happier. She gets paid to restock and shelve books all day with minimal customer interaction; it’s basically her dream job. Amy says the same thing when Hope messages her that she got the job. 

Hope may or may not have a hidden countdown deep in her phone to the day that Amy comes back. It’s buried so deep that someone would have to spend an adequate amount of time on her phone looking to find it, which Hope will never allow. 

She updates Kelly on her life and asks how she is doing—she’s fine and spending most days at the shore. Hope’s never really been one for the beach too much even if it’s barely an hour away. 

All in all, Hope’s summer is starting out pretty nicely. She’s got an easy job that she likes and she’s soaking in the quiet of home life after the constant noise of dorm life. She misses school a little bit, but nothing beats her own bed. Except maybe her own bed with Amy in it with her, but she still has to wait a bit for that to happen again.

Two weeks into her job she gets a text while she’s reshelving books in the right places. She waits until she’s finished with this particular shelf before she takes out her phone to check it; the store has been pretty slow today, but even if it hadn’t been the owner is a lovely old woman who is very lax. Hope raises an eyebrow when she sees a text from Molly—not entirely unheard of since they did get along now, but definitely uncommon.

She opens the text message. _Just got back last night, you up for a lunch?_

Hope glances at the time on her phone; she still has another three hours of her shift. _Can’t, I’m working till 5._

_You have a job? Where?_ Hope isn’t really sure if this is a jab at her or not, so she proceeds with caution. 

_You aren’t the only one capable of work...A New Chapter. It’s a bookstore._

_You know I didn’t mean it like that. And that makes total sense._ Okay, so it was a genuine question. Well, that’s nice at least. Hope almost feels her walks lower a bit at the message.

_Amy said the same._ Not wanting to take advantage of her boss’ laid back attitude, she pockets her phone and starts reshelving books again.

About an hour later, Hope is sitting at the front counter and reading since no one is currently in the store when she hears the bell on the door ring. “Welcome, please let me know if you need anything. I’m—“ She closes her book and stops her greeting when she sees it’s Molly who has walked in. “Oh, hey.”

Molly walks up to the counter with a teasing smile. “Love your greeting, fantastic delivery, wish I could’ve heard the whole thing.” Hope rolls her eyes.

“Yeah, yeah. What’s up?” Molly just shrugs and looks at the books around the counter.

“Nothing, just thought I’d drop in.” Hope looks Molly up and down and nods to herself.

“You were lonely without Amy or Annabelle and figured you’d finally move further down the alphabet, huh?” Molly opens her mouth with a rebuttal but then just stops and narrows her eyes at Hope, a faint blush coating her cheeks. Hope just laughs. “It’s alright. I’ve kind of missed you too.” 

Molly very seriously covers her heart with her hand. “I am. So. _Honored_. To even be slightly missed by you.” Molly keeps a straight face only about half way through the statement and then laughs intermittently. Hope chuckles at the jab. Molly’s laughs fade and she turns more serious again. “Annabelle told me you were the one that told her we should talk. I—uh. Thanks. For that. Things were bad for a while, but they’re much better now. That’s partially because of you so…”

Hope rubs the back of her neck with her hand, uncomfortable with this show of gratitude—especially from Molly, and especially when she feels like she hasn’t done anything at all really. “Don’t even mention it, like seriously. It was nothing, dude.”

Molly’s expression turns to a teasing one again. “You just don’t want everyone to know that deep down you’re a real softy.”

Hope opens her mouth to argue, but the bell rings again signifying another customer so Hope just does her greeting. Molly’s grin widens when she’s able to hear the entire thing. She places her hand on the counter in front of Hope. “Let me know your next day off and we’ll grab lunch, okay? Talk to you later.”

Molly leaves before Hope can even respond to her demand. Hope sighs and just messages Molly that it’s Saturday.

* * *

Hope and Molly actually meet up for lunch a few times, Annabelle joining them once or twice when she also gets back to California. Hope still isn’t really sure what’s going on there between them, but it does seem better so it’s whatever. Somehow throughout these lunches Hope has been roped up into planning a welcome home party for Amy in two weeks. _Two weeks_. Hope almost can’t believe it. It’s both felt so long and flown by. 

Obviously Molly does most of the planning because that is what Molly does, but her plans include Hope which means Hope has to plan. She isn’t really given much of a choice, but even if she had been given one Hope would’ve still helped. Luckily, Molly doesn’t leave Hope with too much responsibility. Her main jobs are to show up on time, and bring cake from Amy’s favorite bakery. Both of which she feels extremely capable of doing. 

Hope also wants to get something for Amy to finally welcome her home. Something more personal and not just for the party, which really is just Hope, Molly, Amy, and her parents from what Hope knows. Hope doesn’t know what to get her, but she spends every minute for about a week trying to think of something. Finally she thinks she lands on something that is personal and that she thinks Amy will enjoy. 

The week that Amy is supposed to come home Hope can feel her body nearly vibrate with anticipation. She and Amy text whenever they can, working around Hope’s work schedule and Amy finishes up everything she has to and packing.

At the same time, Molly is finishing up whatever her plans are for the welcome home party. Beyond the instructions Hope has been given, she isn’t too sure what else to expect. She puts the order in for the cake when the countdown is on three days, just to make doubly sure that it’ll be ready for Thursday afternoon. She also makes sure that she has Thursday off, which her boss is more than happy to give her when Hope tells her the circumstances. 

After Amy texts her that she’s at the airport there’s radio silence for the duration of the long flight. The rest of Hope’s shifts that week seem to both drag on and fly by, which Hope knows doesn’t make much sense but it’s honestly how it feels.

On Thursday, Hope wakes to the alarm of her countdown letting her know that today is the day. She wakes up and turns off the alarm, looking at the notification with a smile for a moment before getting ready for the day. As she’s brushing her teeth she receives a text from Molly. _Everything going according to plan?_

If there’s one thing that Hope has learned is that Molly loves her plans and one should never mess with them. _Yep. Gonna go get the cake soon._

_Good. Remember, try to be at her house latest 1:15._

_I know, I gotcha._ Hope pockets her phone and rinses out her mouth.

Hope dresses quickly and sits down with her dad to have breakfast. She starts eating and subconsciously hums while chewing. He glances over at her and squints a little bit. “Today’s the day that Amy’s coming home right?”

“Yeah, why?” Hope asks around a mouthful of food. 

“You just look...excited. It’s nice.” Her dad smiles and Hope feels the blush on her face, so she just takes another bite of food and shrugs. Luckily, she manages to avoid any further embarrassing comments and heads out to pick up the cake, putting her guitar in the back seat.

Traffic is horrible but she still manages to get to the place early as they’re doing finishing touches. Maybe she’s a bit antsy and excited for her girlfriend to be back, sue her. She sits down at one of the small tables in the bakery and waits, looking around the place and taking in all the cute, homey details. She can totally understand and gets why this is Amy’s favorite bakery; it just makes sense.

Twenty minutes later Hope is placing the cake in her car carefully so it won’t be destroyed while she’s driving. It’s only noon so she has plenty of time, but she doesn’t mind getting there early. It’ll also probably prevent Molly from having a heart attack if she shows up just right on time. 

The drive over to Amy’s place is easy, and she’s parking down the street—as per Molly’s instructions—and walking up to the house with a cake in hand at 12:45. High school her who always walked in as the bell rang is shaking. Hope knocks on the door and a minute or two later it’s swung open by a smiling Molly. “You’re early! That’s great.” 

Molly pulls Hope inside and shuts the door behind her. “Just put the cake on the island.” Molly motions to the island which is filled with foods that Hope is sure Amy’s parents made; they are quite good cooks. Hope places the cake delicately at the other end of the island, seeing the natural flow of the food from appetizer to dessert. 

She looks around the living room and sees that Molly has put up a ‘Welcome Home’ banner, and is in the process of hanging streamers, precariously on her tiptoes in a chair. Hope walks over to offer her help. “Need a hand? Or rather, longer arms?”

Molly huffs but then laughs and hands Hope the streamers as she steps down from the chair. “Yes, please put those long limbs to actual use.” Molly heads off to do...something else that Hope doesn’t know about, and Hope is left to her own devices to hang streamers. It’s actually kind of calming. 

When Hope thinks the room had been sufficiently streamered she puts the chair back with the table and sits on the couch. She checks her phone and sees it’s already 1:20 which means that Amy and her parents should be home in the next ten minutes barring traffic. Molly rejoins her soon after and sits down at the opposite end of the couch from her. 

“I can’t believe it’s already been a year since she left...since graduation.” Molly says and Hope looks over at her, the words fully registering because _holy shit_. It’s really been a year since they graduated high school. So much happens in a year. 

“Woah, yeah...that honestly didn’t even cross my mind. That’s a little...weird, I guess?” Molly nods. 

“Oh definitely. Just think of our relationship a year ago compared to now.” Well, when Molly puts it like that, it’s absolutely insane how much can change in a year. Hope grimaces just a bit.

“Time is fucked.”

“Eloquently put.” The two laugh and then fall into an actual comfortable silence. 

A couple of minutes later Hope hears keys rustling in the door and then Molly’s whacking her arm repeatedly, telling her to stand up. Hope does and follows Molly closer to the door. It swings open and Doug walks through carrying Amy’s suitcase, followed by Charmaine, and then there’s Amy. 

“WELCOME HOME!!” Molly shouts and basically tackles Amy in a hug, while Hope’s is much more subdued as she just looks at Amy wrapped in Molly’s arms. She sees a tear slide down Amy’s cheek and knows this hug won’t end anytime soon, so she goes to the kitchen where Doug and Charmaine are standing to offer any help.

“Oh no, we’re all fine. Thanks for the offer though. It’s great to see you, Hope.” Doug smiles and Charmaine nods in agreement. 

“It’s nice to see you, too. I—oof!” Hope’s next words are interrupted by a body colliding with her back and squeezing tightly around her middle. Hope squeezes the hands interlocked on her stomach and gently pries them apart just so she can turn in Amy’s arms and wrap her in a real hug. Hope rests her head on top of Amy’s and takes a deep, calming breath; her lungs filling with Amy’s natural smell and a little bit of airplane. 

“Hi.” Amy’s voice is muffled against Hope’s collarbone. 

“Hey.” Hope whispers and nuzzles her cheek into Amy’s head. 

They pull apart after a couple more moments, grinning at each other until Amy’s stomach growls. Charmaine claps her hands together and the two girls turn to face them. “I think that one is our cue.”

They all start to make their plates of food and then sit at the table. Amy talks about her flight and her final days in Botswana.

“My host family threw me a going away dinner with a bunch of traditional dishes. It was delicious. Oh! And a bunch of the women that I was teaching got together on the last day for a send off and one of the women, Shelo, gave me a Mbira because she remembered me talking about my autoharp. It’s so cool and beautiful. I might have teared up a little. I’ll have to show you all after dinner.” Amy laughs a little. Hope _is_ listening, but she’s also just watching Amy talk enthusiastically and passionately about her time in Botswana while she eats. The way her face brightens when she remembers another detail and the way the more prominent freckles on her tanned skin form together on the apple of her cheeks as she smiles. Molly and Amy’s parents ask questions, but Hope is happy just watching and listening.

They finish their lunch and Amy’s parents cut up and hand out the cake. Amy’s face lights up when a piece is put on her plate. “My favorite!”

“Yeah,” Molly says while eating a forkful already, “Hope grabbed it.”

Hope peeks up at the mention of her name and shrugs with a small smile. “It was nothing.” She takes a bite of the cake and—holy shit that’s fucking delicious. She hears laughs probably from her reaction to the cake, but she’s too busy experiencing it to care. Amy digs in as well and the table falls silent as they all eat their dessert. 

After dessert they sit around the living room and continue to catch up. Amy grabs the Mbira from her bag and plays it a little bit. It looks like a Kalimba only with two rows of keys, and it sounds heavenly. Hope gives an update on her life with work, which both Molly and Amy already know so it’s really just for Doug and Charmaine. They listen intently though and congratulate her, telling her they’ll have to check the bookstore out sometime. 

Around three, Amy yawns deeply and covers her mouth. “Sorry, jetlag.”

“Oh!” Doug slaps his thigh with his hand. “We’ll let you girls relax and maybe you can take a nap. We’ll be around if you need us.”

“Yes, just give us a holler.” Charmaine adds on and they both get up from the couch and head off into the house. Amy yawns again and nods.

“Let’s just relax in my room because there’s a very real chance that I’m gonna fall asleep, sorry.” The girls all get up and Hope grabs Amy’s luggage to take it to her room. Amy goes to argue but yawns as soon as she opens her mouth and Hope just gives her a look before taking her bag down the hall and to her room. Hope stands to the side of the door and waits for Amy to open it, knowing that that’s a big moment and realization of being home. 

Amy throws her door open and sighs, content. She drops her backpack onto the ground and then flips onto her bed. “Oh I’ve missed you.” Hope can hear Amy mumble into her bed. Hope chuckles and brings the suitcase into her room, dropping it next to Amy’s backpack. Molly moves past Hope to sit next to Amy and Hope notices the smug look on her face as she taps the back of Amy’s shoulder.

“Hey, Hey Ames. Quick thing, just one quick thing.” Amy groans into her bed and flips over onto her back to look at Molly. Hope watches as Molly just glances upwards and raises her eyebrows. Amy’s gaze follows hers, she turns beet red, and then she quickly reaches up and rips away a piece of paper that must’ve been taped to the underside of the top bunk. 

“Dude!” Amy crumples up the piece of paper and Molly bursts into laughter. Now, Hope is curious.

“You said once a day, I just wanted to change my delivery. Welcome home!” Molly leans over and places an exaggerated kiss on Amy’s cheek.

“Okay, what am I missing out on?” Hope crosses her arms as she sits in the chair at Amy’s desk. 

“Nothing!” Amy quickly squeaks out and Molly laughs.

“I mean, I think she has a right to know. It does involve her.” Amy shoots a glare at Molly that seems to be fueled by embarrassment and Hope just raises an eyebrow in waiting. Amy just throws the crumpled up piece of paper at Hope and rolls back over to lie face first on the bed. Hope fumbles for a moment in surprise before catching the crumpled up ball. She unravels the paper and smoothes it out before reading it. _Happy first anniversary to butthole-gate!!_

Hope bursts out into laughter and Amy groans while Molly joins Hope in her laughter. Hope figures out this must’ve been what Molly was doing when she disappeared earlier. Hope crumples up the paper again and tosses it into the trash can. 

“Happy anniversary.” Hope says still in a fit of laughter. Amy pops her head up and looks at Hope.

“No. Nope. This is not something we are commemorating with an anniversary.”

“Oh come on. Up until the throw up, it wasn’t that bad.”

“I disagree entirely.” Amy says with a pout and Hope just smiles at her. 

“Well, no matter what you two decide, I will commemorate it for the rest of my life.” Molly says very sincerely with her hand over her heart. 

* * *

Molly hangs out until dinner time when she has to go home to eat with her mom, but Hope hangs around, moving to sit next to Amy. Amy’s yawns are almost continuous now. “Before you fall asleep, let me just show you something, okay? I’ll be right back.” Hope squeezes Amy’s thigh and she nods. Hope runs out to her car and grabs her guitar from the backseat before heading back inside. She creeps back into Amy’s room to find Amy still awake—but barely—and tracing random patterns into the underside of the top bunk. 

Hope clears her throat and Amy glances up. When her eyes fall on Hope’s guitar she sits up and pats the spot next to her. Hope smiles and sits down, taking her guitar out of her case. “So...I was trying to think of a way to welcome you home and all my ideas were pretty shitty.” Hope laughs self-depricatingly. “But then I remembered that time we were in the car and we sang, and you said that you’d seen my guitar but you’ve never heard me play it...so I thought I’d play you something.” Hope glances at Amy for any objections but she is just looking at Hope with rapt attention through her tired eyes and a smile on her face.

Hope gives her a nervous smile back; she’s never really played in front of many people. Taking a deep breath, Hope starts to softly play the opening notes to “Valerie” by Amy Winehouse. She looks down at her guitar as she plays, concentrating, before she starts to sing the song. She sings softly, her voice nowhere near as incredible as Amy Winehouse’s (few people’s are) and smiles when she reaches the line about jail remembering last year. 

Three minutes later, she finishes strumming and looks up at Amy and shrugs, hoping Amy liked it. “Welcome home.” Amy is grinning and she reaches out to take Hope’s guitar and carefully place it to the side before scooching closer to her. Amy cups Hope’s face between her hands and pulls her into a kiss. Hope feels relief surge through her body at the feeling of Amy’s lips once again on hers. Sure, they fooled around over the phone, but nothing beats feeling Amy’s lips on hers.

“That was amazing,” Amy says, resting her forehead on Hope’s, “but I’m gonna pass out any moment, so let’s take a nap.” Hope laughs and agrees, moving her guitar from the bed to rest it against the wall. She lays down next to Amy and wraps her in her arms. She falls asleep with Amy in her arms and her head resting on Hope’s chest. Hope wouldn’t have it any other way.

* * *

Hope and Amy try to see each other at least three times a week with their work schedules, but even if it was just once a week, it's better than the months of not seeing each other. They manage to watch all of _Sharp Objects_ in one sitting one day and they both are completely blown away by the show. Hope had only heard about the show, not having the time to watch it last year when it came out, but _wow_ is it good.

On the days that Hope has off she hangs out with Amy or the girls from the road trip group chat depending on who’s available. 

Amy even manages to drag Hope to a beach on one of the rare days that their off schedules line up. When they get there Hope worries Amy might pass out for a second when she strips to her bikini. Hope’s plan is to just lay on the towel, sunbathe, and read a book. That plan lasts a good fifteen minutes before Amy is dragging her into the water. 

At some point in the day Molly, Gigi, and Annabelle all show up and join them. Hope has been watching Annabelle and Molly’s interactions for a while and she thinks they might be dating? She isn’t too sure, but they look happy so it really doesn’t matter. It’s a fun day, even when Gigi gets pulled out to sea by a riptide and says it’s her mermaid ancestors wanting her to return to the ocean. The lifeguards manage to get her and bring her back to the beach without too much fuss. Hope only stays in the water for an hour or two before she returns to the beach to continue her original plans for the day, picking up her book. 

She’s alone with all their things and reading stretched out along a towel when a shadow covers her sun. She glances up to see what she can only describe as a dude-bro standing above her. “You’re blocking my light.” Her voice is completely deadpan and she returns to her book, turning the page.

“You don’t need light when you’re so radiant.” Hope scoffs.

“Could not be more uninterested. Move.”

“C’mon,” the guy squats down so that he’s no longer blocking the light, but that means he’s unfortunately closer to Hope. “You’ve barely even—“

“Can I help you?” Hope eyebrows shoot up in surprise at the sound of Amy’s slightly breathless voice. She looks at her girlfriend, seeing her chest heaving a bit, meaning she definitely hurried over here from the water. Hope’s lips quirk up into a smile.

Dude-bro shifts his focus up to Amy and gives her a once over which immediately sours Hope’s expression. “Yeah no, I was just talking to your friend here—“

“She’s my girlfriend actually.” Hope bites her lip, always enjoying when Amy takes charge and surprises her. 

“Really?” Dude-bro says and looks between them, “that’s hot.”

Amy scoffs and crosses her arms. “Seriously, dude? How gross and misogynistic can you get? We are not something to be consumed by your gaze. I feel sorry for every woman on this beach right now that even has to be in proximity of your and that superiority complex you have to cover up for your inadequate penis size.” Amy’s voice is loud enough that another group of girls nearby laugh, Hope joining in. The dude-bro turns read and immediately walks away, fumbling over a comeback that Hope doesn’t even pay attention to. 

“I’m sorry,” Amy looks at Hope. “I know you definitely could’ve handled that on your own, but he looked like he was bothering you.” Amy rubs the back of her neck and avoids eye contact, her confidence once again retreating. Hope just shakes her head. 

“That dude-bro was right about one thing…” Amy looks at Hope, confused. “That _was_ hot.” Amy blushes, embarrassed, as Hope pats the towel next to her. Amy sits down on the indicated towel and Hope brings her into a kiss. 

“You better not fuck on my towel!” Annabelle yells from the water and they pull apart, shocked. Hope just flips her off and goes back to reading her book one-handed; her other hand is occupied holding Amy’s hand as she lays next to her. After a moment, Hope quietly starts to read the book aloud to Amy who hums in acknowledgment and listens, scooting her head over to rest against Hope’s shoulder.

* * *

Hope texts Kelly often. They update each other on their summers and Kelly let’s Hope know that she probably won’t be able to make it out to California this summer since she’s working non-stop. 

It’s August almost too quickly and Hope thinks about where she was this time last year, backpacking across the world. Hope and Amy’s actual anniversary is coming up soon and Hope has absolutely no idea what she’s gonna do. She can barely believe that they’ve already been together for a _year_. 

The week before their anniversary Amy texts Hope. _This time I’m gonna plan something, so don’t you dare!!_ Hope smiles at the message.

_Okay, ready to be wowed._

_That’s too much pressure, lower those expectations a little bit._ Hope laughs.

_Ready to be moderately impressed._

_That’s more like it, thank you <3\. _

_Here to help._ So now, Hope just has to figure out what to get Amy. 

She spends a couple of days thinking about it before she thinks she lands on something that’ll work. She immediately gets started on putting it together as there’s less than a week now until their anniversary. 

The idea that she lands on is a self-help/survival guide to New York filled with Hope’s favorite spots and spots she thinks Amy will like. She also fills it with some funny little tips and tricks that are only about half true, including a checklist for Amy to fill out titled “How to know when you’ve become a New Yorker”. Hope includes a couple of playlists of songs that she’s put together, hidden spots she’s found on both of their campuses, and keeps spots for pictures in the back, putting a few that they’ve taken together over the summer in it. Hope knows it’s overall, incredibly cheesy, but she always prefers something personal and made with care than something bought. She thinks Amy will like it, or rather, she really hopes she will. 

August 11th comes around and with it, their anniversary. Amy comes over to Hope’s right after she’s gotten home from work; she couldn’t take the day off since she is leaving for school soon and needed as many days to work as possible. 

Hope has just gotten out of the shower and is drying her hair when her dad yells that Amy’s here. 

“Give me five minutes!” Hope shouts back. She knows they aren’t leaving until a bit later and are just going to hang out for a bit, but she still doesn’t want to leave Amy waiting for too long. She can’t hear if Amy and her dad are talking at all, but she’s too busy drying her hair anyway; she just hopes that he doesn’t say anything too dad-like. 

Five minutes later she’s walking into her room with her towel wrapped around her and finds Amy sitting on her bed petting Louie. “Hey.”

“Hi!” Amy says still focused petting Louie until she looks up and her mouth drops open. Hope closes the door with a laugh and heads over to her closet, trying to decide what to wear. 

“It really is every time you see me in any state of undress, huh?” 

“It’s our anniversary, it should be against the rules to tease me.” Hope smiles and walks back over to Amy, whose eyes and pupils widen at her approach. She pulls her in for a sweet kiss.

“Happy first anniversary.” She pulls away, holding onto her towel to make sure it doesn’t drop and looks at Amy’s outfit before nodding—casual wear. 

“That wasn’t the teasing I meant.” Amy pouts and Hope laughs, turning around. 

She returns to her closet, slipping on her underwear and bra under her towel before letting it drop. “Louie cover your eyes!” She hears Amy exclaim and glances over her shoulder to see her covering Louie’s eyes with his ears. Hope quickly pulls on a pair of jeans, jumping around a bit to pull them all the way up. Instead of her usual t-shirt and jacket combo, she grabs a plaid button up shirt and rolls the sleeves up to her elbow. 

“Okay, now we’re good.” She turns and strolls over to her bed sitting next to Amy with Louie in between them. “When do we have to head out again?” 

“Not for another half an hour or so.” Amy says, looking at Hope but still playing with Louie’s ears. He doesn’t mind. 

“Okay, cool.” Hope gets up and grabs Amy’s wrapped gift from her desk before sitting back down and handing it to her. “Thanks for putting up with me for a year.”

Amy rolls her eyes and takes the gift. “Yeah, right...your gift is in the car by the way.” Hope smiles and pets Louie, not wanting to focus on Amy unwrapping her gift in case she doesn’t like it. She glances to see Amy unwrapping it and then focuses on Louie. She hears Amy let out a small gasp and then hears the turning of pages. Hope chances a look up and sees Amy fully absorbed in the book, looking through and carefully flipping each page as if it’ll fall apart if she touches it too hard. 

“It’s nothing too much…”

“Shut up,” Amy looks up at Hope with a smile, “I love it.”

“Okay.” Hope smiles back at Amy and watches as she flips through the rest of the book, laughing when she gets to the checklist. When she finishes, she shuts the book and leans over Louie to kiss Hope.

“Thank you...now, grab all your favorite pillows and snacks, and let’s head out!” Amy hops out of Hope’s bed so suddenly that Louie gets up, wondering about the commotion. Hope laughs and grabs some pillows, not really knowing what they’re for yet but going along with it anyway. She and Amy raid her family snack cabinet for all that it’s worth while her dad throws in suggestions of food for them to snag. 

Ten minutes later and arms filled with pillows and assorted snacks, they head out to Amy’s car and fill the backseat which is already piled with blankets and even more pillows. Hope slips into the passenger side, taking the wrapped gift that was on the seat and placing it on her lap. Amy gets into the driver’s side and pulls out of Hope’s driveway. 

“You can open it, you know?” Amy looks over at Hope and Hope gingerly starts to open the oddly shaped package. She lifts the lid of the box and it takes a moment to register what’s inside. It’s a ukulele with a flower pattern drawn onto it, but the lines of the pattern are the names of all the countries she’s been to so far. “There’s room for all the other one’s you’ll go to as well. At least, I hope so. I spent a lot of time trying to get the pattern at the right size so that you can add all the others. Lots of practice papers in the trash before I felt confident enough to do it on the actual ukulele.” 

Hope runs her fingers along the flower, tracing over everywhere she’s been, and smiles. “I love you.”

Amy looks at Hope with a smile and responds, “I love you too.”

Hope places the ukulele back in the box and delicately places it on the floor of the car. She turns up the music just enough to hear it comfortably and she looks out the window, trying to figure out where they’re headed. It isn’t until they pass the Hollywood Forever Cemetery that she clues in.

“What’s playing tonight?” Amy grins as she parks the car in one of the specified lots. 

“Fellowship of the Ring.” Hope laughs as she gathers some of the pillows, blankets, snacks from the car.

“Perfect.” Amy grabs the other half of the things and they walk down the street to get in line in front of the cemetery. The line is already pretty long and doors still don’t open for another 20 minutes. 

“Have you been before?” Amy asks as they stand in line and Hope nods.

“A couple of times. My dad likes to come, says his favorite way to watch movies is with thousands of people in the middle of a cemetery with a bunch of famous people buried in it.” Hope deadpans and Amy laughs, nudging Hope with her elbow. “What? It’s true.”

Twenty minutes later the line starts moving as people are let into the cemetery. Hope notices a _lot_ of people in costumes, and even though it is pretty nerdy it’s awesome for the atmosphere of the night. Amy fumbles with her phone and everything in her arms as they get close in order to pull the tickets up on her phone. 

As soon as they pass through the gates, they follow the crowd deeper into the cemetery until they reach the massive wall that the movie is going to be projected on. Amy immediately claims a spot for them, laying down a blanket, and Hope starts to furnish their little spot with more blankets and the pillows. Amy places the snacks over on one side of the main blanket, and then she and Hope sit down, getting comfortable. 

The movie doesn’t start for almost two more hours, but it always pays to get in early to get a good spot. With all the snacks they brought they still didn’t bring any popcorn or drinks, so Hope jumps up. “I’ll be right back.” Amy nods and moves the pillows around more to make optimal comfort. 

Hope weaves through the incoming crowd of people, all making their own spots on the grass, to get to the tents in the back. She buys a bag of kettle corn and two ginger ales. 

Hope makes her way back to Amy pretty easily, only losing sight of her once. She thinks squeezes through and steps around people until she’s sitting back down next to Amy, handing her one of the ginger ales and placing the kettle corn between them. “Can’t have a movie without popcorn.”

“Facts.” Amy opens the bag and grabs a handful of the still warm kettle corn. Hope cracks open her ginger ale and takes a sip. She holds it between her thighs and leans back on her hands, looking around. 

She and Amy talk and stuff themselves with snacks for the next hour before the movie even starts. The sun finally starts setting and the projector is turned on, showing different movie posters as they wait for it to be showtime. The music they’re playing is pretty alright, so Hope is enjoying it and Amy sings along quietly in intervals when they aren’t talking. 

Finally, the creator of the event comes over the mic and talks about the event, thanking everyone, and telling them to enjoy the show. Amy cheers and Hope settles down into the blankets, propping the pillows up so she has a nice angle.

The couple of trailers start and Hope tugs gently at the bottom of Amy’s shirt. Amy hums and looks down at Hope who just looks at the spot right next to her, where her outstretched arm currently is and raises her eyebrow. She lets go of Amy’s shirt and Amy smiles as she settles down next to Hope, maneuvering the pillows more to get comfortable. Amy laces their fingers together and whoops excitedly with many others when the movie starts.

Throughout the film they shuffle about, changing positions and grabbing snacks, but never straying too far. Hope quotes some parts of the movie under her breath and every time Amy squeezes her hand, sometimes joining in when she also knows the quote. 

Nearly three hours later when the credits are rolling, Hope stretches her arms up over her head and Amy sits up from her position against Hope’s chest. Any starts gathering their things and after Hope has adequately stretched her limbs she joins in to help. 

“You’d definitely be Sam.” Hope says off-handedly as she’s folding up a blanking and Amy gasps, turning to Hope.

“Really?” Hope just nods and smiles at the heartfelt way Amy asks. “Thank you so much… you’re probably Legolas.” 

“I have always wanted a bow.” Hope comments as they start the walk back to the car. 

“Archery is very attractive.” Amy comments without thought and Hope smirks.

“Noted.”

They get back to the car and put everything in the back seat before climbing in the car and heading back home. 

“So are you ready for Columbia?” Hope questions, looking at Amy. Amy drums her fingers on the steering wheel. 

“Yes. A little nervous about the move, but more excited than anything.” Amy is leaving the week before Hope is since she has to go to orientation week, which is now less than two weeks away. “I still have so much to pack.” Amy groans.

“Do you want help? I can come over after work tomorrow.”

“Yes please. Molly is helping out where she can but we keep getting distracted by finding things in my room from our childhood and reminiscing about them so we don’t actually do anything.” Hope laughs and nods. 

“Consider it done.” 

The rest of the car ride is spent in comfortable silence with nothing but music filling the car. Amy pulls up to Hope’s house and Hope unbuckles her seat, grabbing her gift. “Come in?”

Amy immediately puts the car in park and nods, following Hope inside to Hope’s room to continue celebrating their anniversary, making sure Louie stays out of the room. 

Amy leaves early the next morning before Hope has to go to work, leaving Hope with a kiss and a reminder that she’ll see her later. 

* * *

Hope’s day at the bookstore passes uneventfully. She grabs dinner at a Chipotle nearby and then heads over to Amy’s.

When she gets there she knocks on the door, and Amy answers it. She’s wearing a tank top and her hair is pulled up into a bun. She looks adorable. “Please, I need all the help I can get.” Amy says gravely and walks back to her room leaving Hope to close the door behind herself. Hope chuckles, closes the door, and follows Amy to her room, stopping to say hello to Amy’s parents in the living room as she does. 

Amy’s room looks like a mess. Things are strewn about the room and half of the posters that are normally on her wall cover the floor. “Woah.” Hope says as she carefully steps into the room, trying not to knock any piles over. 

“I know.” Amy says as she goes back to her suitcase.

“What have you decided to pack?” Amy pats the top of the suitcase.

“So far I’ve done clothes, that’s easy, but I don’t know what else.” Hope nods.

“Okay, so let’s go through your room and figure out what you want to take with you.”

“Are we Marie Kondo-ing this?”

“That depends...will that bring you joy?” Hope smirks and Amy mumbles a ‘Jesus christ’ before laughing a bit.

“Okay, so I guess I’ll just go around the room…” And Hope does exactly that. She goes around Amy’s room, pointing at and grabbing different items, asking Amy if it’s something she wants in her dorm. She frequently reminds Amy approximately how big her dorm room will be, just so she doesn’t over pack, and they start to get into a grove. 

They’ve been at it for almost two hours when Hope reaches for a stuffed panda bear on Amy’s shelf. 

“Don’t touch Ling-Ling!” Comes Amy’s panicked shout and Hope pauses, the name familiar. She turns to Amy and points up at the panda.

“ _That’s_ Ling-Ling?” Amy turns red and nods. Hope looks between the panda and Amy, confused for a moment before she remembers what Charmaine had said and Amy’s reaction to it. Then it dawns on her. “ _Oh.”_

Amy covers her face with her hands and groans. “Please don’t.”

“Well, you probably won’t need Ling-Ling at Columbia. I’ll be right next door.” Hope smirks and Amy makes a strangled sound in her throat. Hope continues on to the next thing on the shelf, but has to wait for Amy to become responsive again.

Hope and Amy make a lot of progress that night and Amy almost entirely finishes packing.

* * *

The day Amy leaves Hope, goes to see her off alongside Molly, Gigi, and even Annabelle. They actually had a lot of good times this summer, so Hope is happy that they’ve come to wish Amy well. 

Hope helps Doug finish packing the car while Molly and Amy hug tightly. As soon as that’s finished, Amy is wrapped up in a tight hug with Gigi and a short, but friendly hug with Annabelle. When it’s Hope’s turn she just wraps her arms around Amy, placing her cheek on Amy’s head as Amy nuzzles into her shoulder. 

“See you in New York. Let everyone at orientation know who’s boss.” Amy laughs into Hope and nods, pulling apart and giving Hope a quick ‘in front of parents’ appropriate peck. When they pull apart, Amy and Molly go in for another round of hugs and Hope smiles. 

Finally, Amy and her parents are in their car and pulling out of the driveway as the rest of them wave goodbye. The four of them decide to go out to lunch after and they talk about the upcoming year and what they have planned. 

* * *

This time, when Hope steps onto campus it feels more like she’s returning to something, not quite a home, but still something. This year, she gets to live in the bigger dorms that are more like shared apartments. 

She and Kelly coordinated over the summer so that they’re in the same apartment pod, sharing the living space but still maintaining their separate rooms. With the help of her parents, Hope moves in pretty quickly and gives her room a similar set up to what it had last year.

Soon, she’s hugging her parents goodbye and they’re leaving once again. She unpacks what little she has left, during which Kelly and her parents arrive, bringing her things in. 

Hope peeks her head out to say hi and Kelly introduces them. She offers to help, but Kelly waves her off and tells her to finish up her things. Kelly moves in almost as quickly as she does, and soon they’re sitting down in their living room/kitchen area, relaxing and catching up.

There’s a knock on the door in the middle of one of Kelly’s work horror stories and Hope gets up to answer it. She pulls open the door to reveal Amy and smiles. Amy immediately wraps her up in a hug and Hope reciprocates. “Hey, wasn’t expecting you so soon, come on in.”

“The last day of orientation ended early so I figured I’d come over.” Amy follows Hope into her faux apartment and looks around. 

“Ames, this is Kelly.” Amy looks at Kelly and waves.

“Nice to finally meet you.”

“You too, the famous girlfriend who has Hope completely enamoured.” Hope rolls her eyes and takes Amy’s hand leading her to sit join Kelly on the couch. 

“That’s completely untrue.” Hope says crossing her arms as she sits, but still doesn’t let go of Amy’s hand. 

“You aren’t really doing a good job at proving her wrong.” Amy laughs and tugs slightly at their still joined hands to emphasize her point. Kelly laughs with Amy.

“I think we’ll get along fine, Amy.” Hope rolls her eyes again, but it’s entirely performative. She thinks about the coming year, Amy and Kelly becoming friends, spending time with Amy whenever Hope can, and actually being able to declare her major. 

Hope sits next to Kelly and Amy, surrounded by the possibility of the future, and she feels happy.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it. I might do one of each year of college, but definitely not as long. Anyway, let me know what you think.
> 
> You can also talk to me on tumblr at lover-of-many-things.tumblr.com :)


End file.
